List of "Tired" Christmas Music (That Should Be Retired)

Self (Vanity)

[SamAdams76]

The Christmas season is upon us once again and the sounds of holiday music can be heard in shopping malls, restaurants, and other public places. Radio stations are already slipping the occasional Christmas song into their playlists and by mid-December, it will be wall-to-wall Christmas music.

Now that is not a bad thing. I like Christmas music. I collect Christmas music. Later in the Christmas season, I will post a vanity on my favorite Christmas music and that post promises to be much longer than this one.

But why is it that so many tired and really annoying Christmas songs seem to get the most airplay? Is it just me or does it seem like the radio stations play the same few Christmas songs 90% of the time?

On this thread, I will list some of my least favorite or more accurately, the most tired Christmas songs of alltime and will seek your input. I put a lot of thought into putting this list together. You are welcome to disagree with me and/or list a few really tired Christmas songs of your own.

Surely there are worse Christmas songs out there than the ones I am about to list. But I kept my list to songs that are familiar and that get a lot of airplay. The emphasis here on on "tired" rather than "bad." Also, to make my list, the song must have been out for at least five years. These songs have established some longevity of being really tired. I am listing the ones that have been "in our face" year after year. Without so much great material out there (I'll have a separate post on that closer to Christmas), there is no excuse for radio stations not to pursue fresher material.

So in no particular order, here goes...the most "tired" Christmas songs of alltime.

• Elmo & Patsy - Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. Now I'm not normally a violent person. But if somebody was to shoot the person who wrote this song, it would be okay by me. This has got to be absolutely the most annoying Christmas Song I have ever heard. It stopped being funny sometime around 1984. Yet year after year, radio stations seem to play it at least once every hour. Many a Christmas compilation album has been ruined for me by the inclusion of this tired ditty.
  

• Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song. Okay, maybe it was funny the first 232 times I heard it. But this song has really run its course and it should be retired. And to add insult to injury, Sandler released a "sequel" version of this song a few years ago but it already seems like 20 years ago. It's just not "funakah" to hear this anymore.
  

• The Waitresses - Christmas Wrapping. Many, many years ago, back when Ronald Reagan used to refer to Russia as the "Evil Empire," it was cool to play this record at Christmas. It was cutting edge and having this song in your Christmas collection separated you from the Perry Como and Bing Crosby crowd. Well it's not cutting edge, cool or "New Wave" anymore. It's as mainstream as Garth Brooks and as dull as Peter Jennings. Give this record a rest, please.
  

• Jose Feliciano - Feliz Navidad. Must be a "PC" thing because the song itself is lame. Okay, okay, so it's politically correct to be "diverse" and know "Merry Christmas" in 17 different languages. So Buon Natale to you then, I am putting a contract out on this record. I am going to have it inserted into a block of wet cement and send it to the bottom of Boston Harbor. At least the Italians know what to do when something becomes tired and no longer "useful." Time for some new Christmas material from Mexico, and fast.
  

• Cheech & Chong - Santa And His Old Lady. Cheech: "Like I PLAYED with that dude, man." Chong: "Whoa, like Santa Claus ain't no musician, man!" Cheech: "I'm hip, man, like that dude couldn't play for beans, man!" Well I'm hip to Cheech & Chong. They can't play for beans and they aren't funny anymore to boot. Were these guys EVER funny? Must have been a 70s thing.
  

• Band-Aid - Do They Know It's Christmas? Not only was this song a blatant rip-off of "We Are The World" (or maybe it was vice versa) but the question the song poses is ridiculous. Of course they don't know it's Christmas, and they probably couldn't give a shit either. Until this year, did we ever know it was Ramadan over there? And that "Feed The World" chorus, well, here it is 15 years later and the people are still starving over there. Guess it makes liberals feel good to sing the song though. Like the next one on my list...
  

• John & Yoko - Happy Xmas (War Is Over). Maybe it's the spelling of Christmas that irks me most about this record. Didn't this song start the whole loathsome "Xmas" thing? Anyway, you can be sure that this song will get even heavier airplay this Christmas season in light of the current war situation. But I'm so tired of this song already!
  

• Bruce Springsteen - Santa Claus Is Coming To Town. Okay, I like Bruce Springsteen. But I still think he could have picked a better Christmas song to cover. Or even have done an original. Anyway, I was already tired of this song by 1979.

I could think of a few more but I'm going to let my fellow Freepers get a crack at adding to the list of "tired" Christmas music.

[retrokitten]

The worst Christmas album is Barbra Streisand's first Chrstmas album called "Christmas Album".

Ok, I don't get this. Why does she even have a Christmas Album? She is Jewish!! SO is Neil Diamond and he has one, too!!

[Joshua]

Using that record to swat bugs seems fitting.

[Tony in Hawaii]

I don't know, but it was used on the old Andre champagne TV commercials. When I was a kid, I thought it consisted entirely of the phrase "Christmas is here" repeated endlessly, but I've since learned there are other lyrics.

[THUNDER ROAD]

I was a D.J. in West Tennessee back in 1978
when the Eagles released " Please Come Home for Christmas"
( Bells Will Be Ringing)

After I played it for the first time on the Air
I commented " Well Guys.....You have a Whole Year to come
up with something Better than this Crapper "
..........I spent the Next hour answering calls from
Angry Eagle Fans that thoroughly disagreed with my opinion !

I STILL don't like it !

[Tennessee_Bob]

How about one not to ban? Jethro Tull...Christmas Song and Another Christmas Song.

[TexanaRED]

Okay, Sam, help me with this one please.

I love this song but have no idea who it is by or the correct name. The only thing can remember are the words "So this is Christmas" I can hum the tune, but can't figure out a way to hum it to you over the Net. (and you probably wouldn't want me to!) LOL!

[Interesting Times]

Wow. I thought I knew a lot of useless crap. I bow down to the master.

C'mon, you can do it. Quick, who did George Jetson work for? Who was his competitor? What did both companies make?

Now then. Let's sing the "Gilligan's Island" theme song together...

[Tennessee_Bob]

Porky Pig singing Blue Christmas.....

[katnip]

another one I like is Harry Belafonte's "Mary's Boy Child

I'm going to have to get that one. I like Harry Belafonte.
Have you ever heard "Mary did you know?" by Kathy Manea(sp?). Beautiful!

[Lucius Cornelius Sulla]

If you can imagine, we had the chicken contract for the New York World's Fair back in the early '60s.

The World's Fair of 1964-1965 -- Great Show. Most of the best stuff ended up in Disneyworld (the Disney Imagineers made most of it). VP candidate Bill Miller's daughter worked as a guide, and Leonard Miller of the Federation of Economic Education had a great free market exhibit. Had a great time, of course it helps when you in your early 20's.

[Tribune7]

Sam, Your post was exponentially better than anything I have recently read by any professional humor columnist. Chalk one more up to FR.

[Captainpaintball]

I'm begining to hate ALL Christmas music they play on the radio. I swear it is a conspiracy to make people tired of all Christmas music in general, and breed contempt the holiday.

I'M SICK OF IT!!! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!

[Utah Girl]

Barbra has TWO Christmas albums, she released a new one this year. I'm avoiding it like the plague. And Neil Diamond has two Christmas albums out too. I have to confess I have both of them. There are several songs on both that I really like. But it is incongruous to be Jewish and release Christmas albums...And did you know that Neil and Barbra went to the same high school, at the same time?

[BamaFan]

I like the Canadian guys!

[Tennessee_Bob]

Carol of the Bells is one of the few Christmas songs I like. I have a copy of it here done by the Chemical Brothers that is just awesome.

[BamaFan]

That's the Lennon/Ono song. BTW, I like it too, despite the "X" in the title

[Tony in Hawaii]

How 'bout Cher's version of O Holy Night? :)

[Citizen of the Savage Nation]

All excellent examples, to be sure, but Jingle Cats, and really, Jingle *anything* needs to be added to the Must Retire NOW list. That song was so stupid I knew it was destined for instant success among the sheeple.

There's also one song that I don't know the name of, sung by these very remarkably laid back mall chicks...singing lyrics about mall shopping and stuff. Needs to go.

[Clovis_Skeptic]

I cringe when I hear the "Little Drummer Boy"...I hate this song!!!...I have always hated this song!!!...when it's on, it seems to never end... Pa rumpa pum pum, Pa rumpa pum pum..yuuuuchhhh!!@3$%***

[Tony in Hawaii]

Will somebody more patient than I am please explain the X in "Xmas"?

Briefly, it goes back hundreds of years and isn't disrespectful.