Posted on 01/13/2017 3:56:27 AM PST by grundle
Dear Amy: I am 21 years old and attend college out of state. I am lucky to go to college, except that I cant do anything without parents approval. They pay for college because they refuse for me to have loans. The problem is that since they pay for my schooling, they hold everything over my head.
If I want to get a piercing, tattoo, etc., I need to ask even if its with my money.
When I come home they only let me go out or visit friends in other towns if I give the names, address and phone numbers of the people Im visiting.
I understood this in high school, but I cant live like this anymore. Im at a loss of what to do.
A Not So Independent Adult
Not So Independent Adult: Figuring out the solution to your problem does not require college-level deduction. Its really very simple.
You are legally an adult. As an adult, you have the legal right to be in charge of your life.
This means that you can drop out of school, sign up for the military or try to get a job and rent your own place, tattoo and pierce yourself with abandon...
I gather that you are not ready to take on adulthood to that extent. And, of course, it would be wisest for you to stay in college.
And so if you choose to stay in college, your parents will control certain aspects of your life. Thats the contract: As long as they are paying the bills, they will treat you like a teenager.
Please understand, however, that their choice to refuse to let you take out loans is a huge, life-altering gift to you...
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtonpost.com ...
Exactly what I tell my own Offspring. The day they can't bear the constraints of living in our house, they are welcome to leave. They may take whatever they personally own and our best wishes. "Write when you find work."
The horrors! Piercings and tattoos are *so* vitally important for todays job market, especially in sales.
....commitment....responsibility..... servitude..
. NO WAY
I’ll delete servitude...*smiles*
unsee
unsee
unsee
same way at my house.
I used to say “Let me help you pack!!”
Imagine your daughter showing up with THAT on her arm - “But Daddy, I LOVE him!” :-)
What career path do you suppose Mr. IMakeGoodDecisions has chosen?
People whose parents are paying the bills are not adults, regardless of their chronological age.
A few years back, when I still went to movies, my wife and I were standing in a line to get tickets. As we got closer to the box office, I could see that the young kid selling tickets had obviously had some kind of reconstructive facial surgery, and even from where I stood, I could evidence of a facial prosthetic.
In addition, you could see the poor kid had a pretty bad acne problem.
I was thinking to myself that being a young teenager can be tough sometimes, even when you seemingly have everything going for you. When you have a bad case of acne and facial surgery...well, I felt a pretty deep sense of sympathy and compassion for that kid.
As I got closer, I realized the “prosthetic” I thought I had seen from further away was actually piercings that were placed all the way around the top of the mouth on the lip, and came around the corner of the mouth and halfway across on the bottom.
I was nearly spitting with irritation. I felt that somehow I had completely wasted my sympathy on this turd who did this to himself.
I don’t judge people who cannot control the color of their skin or things like their appearance. They cannot help how God made them, and that is that. But have no problem judging people who dye their hair green and pink, or get stuff inserted all over their face.
As Eddie Murphy once said “You brought that **** on yourself.” (I know, I know...quoting Eddie Murphy!)
Given the outrageous costs and marxist climate at most of today's campuses, many would take issue with said 'wisdom'.
This country will ALWAYS need people who know how to make things work.
Most $150,000 BAs are today's equivalent of a HS diploma, and often worth about as much to the marketplace as a landscaper's assistant.
I would disagree, but it is important to define your terms. I would say they are adults, but I would also say they are freeloaders.
Imagine your daughter showing up with THAT on her arm - But Daddy, I LOVE him! :-)
= = = = = = =
“”For ONCE my father was right.
The country is going to hell under Affirmative Action etc.
The ONLY reason I didn’t get the job is because I am White and some Foreigner or Minority got it instead of me””
True, and depending on your definitions, you are likely to be saying something similar, but in a different way.
I will NEVER have a W-2.
Oldest joined the Navy. But blew alot of $$ on crap so she was always broke.
Younger went to college, we helped her pay. She had to maintain most A’s, or we would not pony up. She did not believe we would make her stick to that deal. We did, she was FLOORED that 1 A and the rest C’s was not acceptable. She dropped out for awhile, but when she resumed, she paid everything.
they are both $$ Nazis now which amuses me to no end. You have to earn to appreciate.
I do believe that is the scarlet pimpernel twining around his ear
That's the truth! My oldest is in the Coast Guard. Second has graduated from college but doesn't have a job in his field (marketing) yet.
Tattoos and piercings so early in the discussion is the obvious clue that this is really the issue, not the rest. Just like when a Libertarian wants to tell you seriously about the virtues of their cause and the first thing they zero in on is marijuana or the War on Drugs. That’s a dead giveaway that all they *really* want is to have their dope legally and the rest is all window dressing to disguise their addiction.
For the life of me, the only thing my brain sees when I notice tattoos and exorbitant piercings is “lemming, lemming, don’t hire, don’t hire”. Sorry. I see no creativity or self-expression. I just see a moron who wants to be a human pincushion. Mom and Dad are wise to tell her no.
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