Posted on 02/24/2008 5:23:22 AM PST by Huntress
Bridesmaids may soon be forced to sign contracts agreeing not to put on weight or get pregnant before a friend's wedding.
One in five brides-to-be is so concerned that her bridesmaids might let her down that she would ask her maid-of-honour to sign a written "pre-nuptial agreement", according to a new poll.
A bridesmaid contract is the latest American-style trend for brides
Despite the fact that 61 per cent of brides picked a best friend as their choice of bridesmaid and 49 per cent chose their sister, 48 per cent would sack a bridesmaid who failed to stick to the rules.
The survey of 1,000 women, commissioned by You & Your Wedding magazine, asked women which clauses they would put in their contract.
It found that respondents' biggest gripes were with bridesmaids who put on weight, became pregnant or changed their hairstyles before the big day.
A series of suggested clauses included that bridesmaids should not consume more than 10 units of alcohol or make any advances towards "inappropriate male guests" - or the groom.
Many women who had already married reported stories of their bridesmaids letting them down on their big day.
One woman said her maid-of-honour left her dress at a service station on the way to the wedding after deciding she didn't like it, while another revealed a bridesmaid had left 30 invitations unsent in her desk drawer.
Colette Harris, editor of You & Your Wedding magazine, said: "Planning weddings can be a stressful time for brides and while our contract is meant to be tongue-in-cheek, the survey demonstrates that issues with bridesmaids are of concern to many readers.
"Perhaps official contracts are the way forward for brides struggling to keep the peace."
Siobhàn Craven-Robins works with hundreds of brides a year in her role as wedding planner and has organised the weddings of celebrity clients including Joan Collins and Barbara Windsor.
"There has been a spoof contract like this on the internet in recent years but I'm not sure if the brides I know would actually use the real thing," she said.
The bridesmaid's contract is the latest American-style trend for brides. It follows the opening in Berkshire of the country's first bridal boot camp for women determined to shape up to fit into their dresses.
Trudy Dixon, the director of Bridal Boot Camp, said while many of the bridesmaids that work out at the boot camp had complained about the colour or style of the dresses chosen for them, few brides she knew would resort to such draconian measures to keep their ladies in line.
"I've been a bridesmaid several times and if I was presented with a contract, I would suggest they found another friend to do the job" she said.
How many men want anything bigger than a short ceremony? Weddings are nothing more than major productions.
I gotta see some pics of that!
Oh, good grief, it’s come to this!
When I married mr. a, my bridesmaids were his sister and our two best friends. His sister was, I think, 42 years old and our friends were not fashion models by any means - one friend was 200+ pounds.
I picked them because I love them. No contract necessary because none of us would ever let another down.
On the wedding day, they were a beautiful sight to me, and to everyone who cares about me.
My younger sister went all out for her wedding and she was a wreck worrying that every little thing would come off as planned. She spent more on flowers for her wedding than my wife and I spent on our entire wedding (no joke).
How about the brides signing a weight contract? :-)
(Ducking for cover. Okay, the grooms should sign one too!)
...my sister-in-law is insisting that her daughter’s wedding be “black tie” for the guests....so in addition to transportation costs, hotel costs, wedding gift costs; I gotta rent a tux!...my wife says I need do it or it will be a big stink in the family....I’ve been to a lot of weddings over the years but I’ve never heard of one were the bride tells the guests what to wear....am I in the wrong about resenting this demand?
Just can't resist an anti-American dig...
You better get the tux.
I always wanted my grandmother to be my matron of honor.
I’m no fan of today’s glitz weddings, but I can see a point here. The bride (or her family) pays for all this stuff including the bridesmaid outfits. These things are arranged months in advance.
What chaos I can only imagine would befall an already frazzled bride and her mother, to find out the week of the big event that the maid-of-honor can no longer fit the dress.
Women are their own worst enemies...
That’s true. But in this narcissistic nation it’s very unusual to find young women who are interested in anything but making themselves the center of attention.
IF that were true, I'd agree, except that it's still very rude. But the truth is, most bridesmaids "get" to pay for the gowns themselves. Just part of the joy, buying every expensive hideous dresses we'll never wear again.
I wish it was customary for brides to pay for it.
....am I in the wrong about resenting this demand?
No, just see if you can find an American flag tux and wear a black tie.
I told (suggested) my guests what to wear, but it was a casual wedding on the beach. I didn't want them dressing up and ending up uncomfortable. I wanted to make sure they wore shorts and beach shoes and were dressed to have fun :~)
My cousin has an annual "Ugly Bridesmaid Dress" party with her friends. It's a hoot.
Heh... I’d at least like to cut them up and make some nice curtains out of some of them. :~\
Every bride wants everything to be perfect on her wedding day. In reality there is no such thing, no matter how hard one tries.
What’s the performance penalty? You can always change your mind about the bridesmaids, even without a contract. After all, its a “by invitation” position.
So, I guess the contract is just to make things clear so there will be no hard feelings. LOL
Yes.
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