Groaner Puns (Your favorite?)

[Lucky9teen]

And this church...

[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

[aruanan]

That’s pretty good.

[Political Junkie Too]

Sorry about my remark... I didn't mean it to come off as cross or short-tempered. I don't know what to tell you about your joke.

-PJ

[engrpat]

LOL....bad, bad!

[allmendream]

Here lies Pecos Bill
He always lied and always will
He once lied loud
He now lies still

[Zack Attack]

A string walked into a bar and orders a drink. “Sorry, we don’t serve strings,” said the barman. “What? That’s discrimination,” said the string. So the string walked into the bathroom and tied himself in a knot and split his end. He came back out and approached the bar and again attempted to order a drink. “Aren’t you that string I just refused to serve?” asked the barman. “No. I’m a frayed knot.”

[A_Former_Democrat]

She’s a little skinnier than I like, but I’ll take her.

[bert]

Go ahead. I asked the mods and they say this is a pun thread, not political or religious.

[Nathan Jr.]

Two termites walk into a saloon. One asks the other, “Is the bartender here?”

[GSWarrior]

A mushroom walks into a bar.
The bartender says "Sorry, but we don't serve your kind here."
The mushroom says, "Why not? I'm a fungi."

[Ruddles]

What goes forth and back across the Wine-Dark Sea?

Homeric fish I do believe, the Ichthyid, then Codessey.

[Alouette]

A Louisiana farmer grew the world's largest watermelon, which he kept in a melon patch guarded by his faithful watchdog, a collie, who gave birth to a litter of pups

During Hurricane Katrina, the farmer called out to his faithful dog to float her pups over on the prize-winning fruit:

"Come to me on my melon, collie baby!"

[Overwatcher]

I think you win the prize. By the way, a termite went into the local tavern and asked, “Where’s the bar tender?”

[KenHorse]

No problem! Still, I can’t make up my mind whether to post it or not!

[Overwatcher]

I think you win the prize. By the way, a termite went into the local tavern and asked, “Where’s the bar tender?”

[ConservativeAtLast]

Mahatma Gandhi, the famous holy man, developed very thick pads on his feet over a lifetime of walking. In his old age, he became frail and ill, and developed horribly bad breath.

He was a super calloused fragile mystic, plagued with halitosis.

[Overwatcher]

In the deep south two boll weevils were born at the same time. One grew up and went to Hollywood, where he became rich and famous. The other one stayed on the cotton farm and became known as the lesser of two weevils.

[Radix]

I knew a Wrestler who had his arm twisted so out of shape that it looks like an “ess”.

Now he cannot tell his Ess from his Elbow.