Posted on 03/21/2007 8:14:07 AM PDT by TruthWillWin
22 WAYS TO BE A GOOD DEMOCRAT
1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.
2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical documented changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.
12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison & A.G. Bell.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.
16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very nice person.
17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it has been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.
18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.
19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese Government is somehow in the best interest of the United States.
21. You have to believe that it's okay to give Federal workers the day off on Christmas Day but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."
22. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right wing conspiracy.
Can you add to this list?
You feel the objective in an election is to win.
Quick!
Somebody send this to RINO Rudy and his bots.
11 has to be expanded
11. You have to believe that Al Gore Spent millions of his own money to make "An Inconvienant Truth" only out of the kindness of his heart, but Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain only.
And lying (called spin) is OK to accomplish the win.
23: You have to believe in the concept of "Carbon Neutrality", and be willing to purchase "Carbon Credits", but be willing to take a limo to the private jet to fly you across country to chastise others for using the wrong kind of light bulbs at home.
I know several democrats who don't think this way.
Sadly, I have not been able to convince them to switch parties.
They will clearly do anything to win.
Expansion is very appropriate.
Freedom of speech must never be suppressed, except for criticism directed at minorities and other constituencies of the Democrat party;
23., Good one.
I'm sure someone can do a better job with it... I can't think clearly today... allergies kicking in.
Bump for later read
# 24. You believe that the eagle (our national symbol) is worthy of federal protection, but our flag (our national ensign) is not worthy of protection and can be burned as a matter of "free speech".
Don't you know you can buy your way into Gaia's grace by purchasing Carbon Indulgences from Al Gore's Bank of Carbon & Trust?
You have to believe the end, justifies the means.
* You believe that Third-World cultures and people are more virtuous than the Judeo-Christian, Western Civilization that forms the basis of traditional America up until the 1970s.
* You believe that the United Nations and the World Court can be better trusted to administer international justice than our own Congress or Supreme Court.
* You wish in the deepest part of your heart that America was more like Europe, rather than the other way around.
as funny as this is, I have seen one aimed at republicans that makes us look equally as stupid.
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