Democrats Call for U.S. Troop Pullout from Lebanon

ScrappleFace ^ | November 22, 2006 | Scott Ott

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

Democrats Call for U.S. Troop Pullout from Lebanon by Scott Ott

(2006-11-22) — A day after the assassination of Lebanese Christian politician Pierre Gemayel, Democrats in the U.S. Congress called on President George Bush to pull U.S. troops out of Lebanon as a way of ending the strife that threatens to descend into civil war.

“As everyone knows,” said Rep. Jack Murtha, D-PA, a former Marine, “the American military is the cause of terrorism and sectarian tensions around the world. We can’t win in Lebanon, so we need to begin a phased redeployment immediately.”

Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, a professional Vietnam veteran, said, “There’s no reason that young American soldiers need to be going into the homes of Lebanese people in the dead of night terrorizing kids and children and women, breaking historical customs, religious customs. Lebanese soldiers should be doing that.”

The former Democrat presidential nominee added, “if American young people would study hard, do their homework and make an effort to be smart, they wouldn’t get stuck in Lebanon.”

House Speaker-elect Nancy Pelosi, D-CA, said the recent U.S. elections in which Democrats swept to a majority in the House and Senate, “were a mandate from the voters to get out of Lebanon and liberate those people from the oppression of the U.S. occupation that causes them to act out like this.”

Asked when the president would submit to the will of the people and pull the military from Lebanon, an unnamed White House spokesman said, “1984.”

In related news, Iran and Syria today offered to mediate the crisis by holding a summit meeting with the president of Lebanon and Hezbollah leader Sheik Hassan Nasrallah to discuss ways of preventing foreigners and Muslim fanatics from upsetting Lebanon’s natural state of peace and security.

[Piquaboy]

Those people are so smart they scare me.

[100-Fold_Return]

So CNN and pMSNBC can demand we invade Iran, N. Korea, and Venezuela!

[fatnotlazy]

Asked when the president would submit to the will of the people and pull the military from Lebanon, an unnamed White House spokesman said, “1984.”

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My laugh for the day. Thanks for posting this.

[Dog Gone]

Asked when the president would submit to the will of the people and pull the military from Lebanon, an unnamed White House spokesman said, “1984.”

I love Scrappleface.

[Falcon4.0]

This would be more believable if the headline was...

"Democrats Call for U.S. Troop Pullout from America"

[Skylus]

bookmark for later

[Wolverine]

[JohnLongIsland]

Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, a professional Vietnam veteran


i'm still laughing.

[Wolverine]

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

It is good to read the comments by readers at ScrappleFace.

A sample is below.
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There are a lot of other places we should pull out of. What about Arizona, Texas, California, Nevada, and New Mexico? Didn’t we forcibly take that land from Mexico after the Mexican War?

And what about Alaska? Two cents an acre??? Even in the 1860’s that wasn’t any money. We took advantage of Russia, and as an act of good faith and friendship we should give it back. Just think how much good will that would get us in the World community.

Do I need to mention the Louisiana Purchase? It was a deal, fair and square, but just imagine how it would improve our relations with France if we gave it back. Not to mention that it would finally legitimize France as a superpower.

We can’t forget Native Americans. We came here 400 years ago, murdered them and stole the East Coast. We have to pull out of there too.

Think about the upside. We get rid of Ted Kennedy, Chuck Schumer, Hillary et al because there would be no more Senate or House and we all get to live in Hawaii!!

Regards,

Comment by egospeak