Good grief. Judging from the reactions here, it seems women just can't win no matter what they do. No matter what happens, it's always the woman's fault.
This woman is 67 years old, her husband dumped her for a younger woman, and she has no recent jobs skills! That could happen to any stay-at-home wife. How many Freepers would want that to happen to themselves, to their daughters, sisters, mothers? Is it okay that her husband did that to her? What if your son-in-law did that to your daughter? Would it be okay? Did this woman deserve it somehow? Not one word of condemnation for the husband, but *she's* evil! If she'd had a career throughout her marriage, she'd be financially okay now, but then Freepers would condemn her as a Feminazi. Since she *didn't* have a career, that means she must have wanted to be kept as a "pet" her whole life!
So what the h### are women supposed to do? Obviously stay-at-home wives have a lot of nerve if they expect to be supported all their lives, according to Freepers. But on the other hand, if they have careers, they are evil Feminazis who are neglecting their children!
Come on! Women are people, too, and they get a lot of mixed messages. Even the most vicious woman-hater on FR (and unfortunately, there are a lot of them,) has female relatives. How do you want them to be treated? We're all trying to do the best we can in this life. Have some compassion, for crying out loud.
do I smell a 'I'm gonna write a sequel to my book' publicity stunt here....?
Good summary.
WELL SAID!
I was having trouble finding the words - you took care of that!
Kudos, and thank you.
Excellent post!! It is sad to see some FReepers take such attitudes - in the eyes of some poeple women are damned if they do damned if they don't. I get the impression that certain posters just don't like women period. Really sad. Thanks for being a voice of reason!
That's right. If she stays at home to care for the kids, scrub the toilets, get a hot dinner on the table by 6 every night, and move all over the US in support of her husband's career, she's a leech. If she has a career she's a feminist lib and is, as you say, neglecting the children and her husband.
. . .the most vicious woman-hater on FR (and unfortunately, there are a lot of them,). . .Have some compassion, for crying out loud.
Sorry, Nea, your assessment is accurate: a lot of them are vicious woman-haters, and as such they are devoid of compassion for females.
For those who expect a 67-year-old woman to maintain current job skills, I'd like to ask how she is supposed to fit that little activity into a day that involves taking care of a house, a husband, and FIVE children. That's more than a full-time job and it often goes on until late at night, seven days a week. So she finally gets the last child raised, maybe ten years ago, and she's supposed to go back to work at the age of 55 or so on grounds that her husband might at some point have an affair and dump her? Most women who were not paranoid would not guess that a husband to whom they had been devoted for many years would simply ambush them with divorce papers and that they'd need to prepare for that possibility.
Well said!
Thank you!
My mother was a stay-at-home mom. She left college to get married but finished her degree afterwards. While we we children she didn't work, but she went back to work when I was a teenager. Her initial jobs were low-paying clerical jobs--she started back temping. However, right now she has a very promising job where her employers find her invaluable (and are expressing their appreciation monetarily!) She is now 56 and my father is 58, and who knows when either will retire.
I can understand staying home when a person has children, but when it's just the house to take care of I think it would get boring. I certainly would find other work more appealing than cleaning house all day.
Excellent post.
Excellent comments. Said it better than I could have
bravo! everytime the subject of divorce comes up here, the woman is made out to be the witch who deserves it or caused it... must be some really bitter Freepers... i'm disgusted not only with the husband but with the new woman and others like her who have no problem taking part in ending a marriage... and who will do, say and believe anything to justify it...
So what the h### are women supposed to do? Obviously stay-at-home wives have a lot of nerve if they expect to be supported all their lives, according to Freepers. But on the other hand, if they have careers, they are evil Feminazis who are neglecting their children!"
You NAILED it. The attitudes toward women on this forum, and the contradictory expectations are a disgrace. I say this as someone who is and always has been very traditional.
Excellent post, Nea!
BRAVO!
Great post.
I think some DIVORCED male FReepers use this forum to bash women because they are so ineffectual in having a genuine discussion of their problems in real life.... I suspect a lot of men like playing the femme fatale as much as women do.
Many apparently yearn for the good ole days when women died early and saved their husbands from having to divorce them.
One question though about the "younger" woman how young is younger? 60? 65? 30?