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Heteroflexible -- or Fauxmosexual?
WebMD Health ^ | March 19, 2004 | Daniel DeNoon

Posted on 01/30/2005 7:57:30 PM PST by scripter

Parents and teens alike are exploring sexual identity issues.

Are they heteroflexible -- or fauxmosexual?

Girls barely in their teens are exploring their sexuality. And more and more often, that exploration includes same-sex behavior.

The trend has, inevitably, spawned new words. Some say they're "heteroflexible." Others sneer that they're merely "fauxmosexual."

Is it really new? More importantly -- to parents and to the teens themselves -- what does it mean? Lisa M. Diamond, PhD, assistant professor of psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah, Salt Lake City, studies young women's sexual orientations, sexual attractions, and sexual behavior.

"Women's sexual behavior is more influenced by cultural and situational and even educational factors than men's," Diamond tells WebMD. "So given that today there is more visibility of same-sex behavior, it's likely there is an increase in young women experimenting with same sex behavior -- and talking openly about their experiments."

That's true, says Charlotte Patterson, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Virginia. Patterson's work focuses on sexual orientation and human development.

Blame It on Britney?

It has certainly always been true that teen girls are quick to pick up on the latest fab fads. Some 40 years ago, it was teen girls who ushered in Beatlemania. The sexual undercurrents of this phenomenon -- fairly mild by today's standards -- shocked parents of the '60s.

Dick Hall, assistant headmaster at The Lovett School in Atlanta, says teen girls' exuberant embrace of their sexuality can be a good thing.

"With the Madonna-Britney influence and all, things are much more outrageous in the popular culture these days and the girls pick it up," Hall tells WebMD. "I don't see it as unhealthy. For the most part it is girls being proud of their femininity and their strengths and not being timid or taking secondary roles. It is often a matter of pride, although they can also fall into those roles that do dim the light of individuality."

But what's happening today goes far beyond the Britney-Madonna tease-the-boys kiss. It's more than a fad.

Anthony D'Augelli, PhD, professor of human development at Penn State University, hasn't yet heard the term "heteroflexible." But he says girls today are exploring their sexuality in different ways than their mothers and grandmothers did.

"There really are changes in the way young people look at sexuality that are different than other generations," D'Augelli tells WebMD. "They don't stigmatize diversity the way we did." He says the media present positive images of woman-oriented women, and this will make a big difference in females. "There really are changes that are going on in the younger groups: destigmatized sexual discussions, sexual experimentation, and so on."

More Girls Than Boys

What about the boys? The experts who spoke with WebMD agree that although there's much more exposure to sexuality today than in previous generations, the phenomenon of teens openly exploring same-sex sexuality is largely limited to females.

"Since females are allowed by our culture to explore sex-role diversity -- they can be more tomboyish than boys can be sissyish -- there is more flexibility for them to explore sexuality," D'Augelli says. "There are more girls in my research that explore bisexuality than boys."

D'Augelli notes that boys are much more likely to be penalized for exhibiting behavior that goes against the norm than are girls. Patterson agrees but suggests that there's more to it than that.

"Certainly men are more stigmatized for non-heterosexual behavior than women are, because of men's higher status in our society," she says. "But there is also some degree to which our inbuilt nature as sexual creatures is different. The survey data always show women are more likely to describe themselves as bisexual than men. So you would expect on that basis alone to see more women experimenting."

Out: The 'Lay's Potato Chip' Theory of Sexuality

So what are these young women really up to? Are they really heteroflexible? Or are they just going through a fauxmosexual phase?

None of the above, says Diamond.

"A lot of the problem is we have very simplistic ideas of sexuality and development," she explains

It isn't simple because humans aren't simple. Our sexuality is one of the most complex things about us. From time immemorial, humans have engaged in what Diamond calls "an incredible variety of behaviors." And at different times of their lives -- particularly in their youth -- individuals may engage in different kinds of sexual behavior.

"There are sexual behaviors people engage in at some early times in their lives that aren't necessarily consistent with what they end up doing," Diamond says. "Our only language is to say it's only a phase. But it is more accurate to say our sexuality is such that it is possible for people to desire and want something that runs counter to their predominant sexual disposition."

That's hard to understand for people who subscribe to what Diamond calls "the Lay's Potato Chip" theory of sexual orientation: You can't have just one.

"It's the old way of seeing things: The 'you can't have just one' theory," she says. "The old idea is that if you have one same-sex affair, you are a lesbian. But some girls do just have one same-sex affair. It is a real phenomenon. It is neither a phase nor repression. It just results from the complicated nature of sexuality during the adolescent years."

Sex Without Labels

Diamond is eight years into a study in which she's following 80 women who -- between the ages of 18 and 25 -- originally identified themselves as not being exclusively heterosexual.

About half the women changed the way they identified themselves during the course of the study. Although some came to identify themselves as heterosexual, most who switched identities did so by giving up labels altogether.

A woman's sexual identity does not necessarily define her sexual attractions and sexual behaviors.

What About My Child?

Any label other than "heterosexual" distresses many parents.

"It is such a big label in our culture," Patterson says. "Before a child is born, everyone wants to know if it's going to be a boy or girl. We wonder about their sexuality, too, and we all have our intuitions about our own kids. But when you compare parents' ideas to what the kids tell us they have become -- well, I don't know if parents are very good at telling the answer in advance."

Constantly worrying about a child's sexual orientation is an exercise in futility, Diamond says. And it may say more about the parent than the child.

"Rather than monitor their kid for signs of gayness, they should know that what you see isn't necessarily what you end up getting," Diamond says. "Not every sign of same-sex sexuality means homosexuality. But parents have to become comfortable with more sexual ambiguity than they have been used to. And some of this may be reflecting the fact that if I don't know what is happening with my child's sexuality, I am not sure what is going on with my own sexuality. Remember, fluidity is the way we are made."

Even so, the way a parent responds means a lot to a young person.

"Parental reactions are important," D'Augelli says. "They have to get used to the fact that things are changing, and this is not a bad thing. Young people will eventually get to an identity that feels comfortable to them. Things are so different now."

Puberty is a time of turbulence. Traditionally, we've tried to get a handle on human sexuality by trying to fit everything into just a few simple categories. What's going on now, D'Augelli says, is a the rediscovery of true human development.

"That is scary, because most people think of their kids as heterosexual," he says. "Any divergence is scary, even for the most liberal parent. But more and more parents are going to have to deal with their children coming out in more and more ways at earlier ages. And parents are going to need to deal with what it means for them to be a sexual person."


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: division44; gay; homosexual; homosexualagenda; homosexuality; homosexualpropaganda; identitycrisis; lesbian; malpractice; pederast; psychology; teens
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To: Modernman
I also believe that a certain percentage of the population (perhaps 2-4%) is solely sexually attracted to members of their own sex

And I do not, no more than I believe some people cant help but be addicted to alchol!

81 posted on 01/31/2005 12:05:08 PM PST by N3WBI3
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To: scripter
...the word choice can be a complicated word in this instance.

To use the same word, choice, to describe both when you pick out a flavor of ice cream to have at an ice cream store and what sex you are sexually attractive to distorts the meaning of the word too much for me.
82 posted on 01/31/2005 12:09:10 PM PST by BikerNYC
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To: N3WBI3
And I do not, no more than I believe some people cant help but be addicted to alchol!

My evidence is anecdotal, of course. I've had this conversation with homosexuals before and that has been their position: they simply do not find members of the opposite sex sexually attractive.

83 posted on 01/31/2005 12:11:11 PM PST by Modernman (What is moral is what you feel good after. - Ernest Hemingway)
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To: BikerNYC

I can understand that, and one of these days I'm going to write something up that defines all the issues here and then I'm going to save it somewhere handy, as the issue comes around about once a week.


84 posted on 01/31/2005 1:07:45 PM PST by scripter (Tens of thousands have left the homosexual lifestyle)
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To: Modernman
So, the argument that a person can 'choose' to be gay holds no water with me. There has to be at least some predisposition towards homo- or bisexuality, IMHO.

Have you ever read what former homosexuals have to say about the issue?

85 posted on 01/31/2005 2:26:36 PM PST by scripter (Tens of thousands have left the homosexual lifestyle)
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To: scripter
Have you ever read what former homosexuals have to say about the issue?

I doubt those people were truly homosexual. More likely, they were bisexual.

86 posted on 01/31/2005 4:28:19 PM PST by Modernman (What is moral is what you feel good after. - Ernest Hemingway)
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To: EdReform; backhoe; Yehuda; Clint N. Suhks; saradippity; stage left; Yakboy; I_Love_My_Husband; ...

Homosexual Agenda Ping. The Onslaught doesn't stop. Just think of how these girls are going to grow up - what memories will crowd into their minds later on, how their innocence has been ruined, how their parents and schools and churches/synagogues etc have failed them.

If children aren't told right from wrong, and aren't expected to follow moral guidelines, they won't. And those who are supposed to teach and protect them bear the responsibility for their ruination.

Let me and DirtyHarryY2K know if anyone wants on/off this pinglist.


87 posted on 01/31/2005 4:49:16 PM PST by little jeremiah (Moral Absolutes are what make the world go round.)
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To: Modernman
I doubt those people were truly homosexual. More likely, they were bisexual.

That's an incredible statement! Apparently you haven't read any of their life stories - many of the former homosexuals I've read about considered themselves 100 homosexual and were only attracted to members of the same sex... Until their confusion was cleared. We have some here on FR.

88 posted on 01/31/2005 4:55:53 PM PST by scripter (Tens of thousands have left the homosexual lifestyle)
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To: DakotaGator

They need a strong reality check.

Ah but they all know that. They want a voice and a say in OUR reality. And they are getting it too. They keep encouraging this crap, it becomes trendy in school, and they get what they are looking for. We need to get this crap out of the linelight!!!!!


89 posted on 01/31/2005 5:04:44 PM PST by gidget7
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To: cyborg

that's the very reason you see it on tv. They want to desensitize, and as far as these firls, and these self proclaimed experts, it's working!

I think we should send every one of these articlkes to Margaret Spelling!


90 posted on 01/31/2005 5:09:27 PM PST by gidget7
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To: NativeTexun
I got petitions to get that gross show off the air, well it's still there, and in the family hour too. We don't watch NBC anymore, at all!!

The verbal sexual content on that show is horrid. The innuendo, and physical stuff, is way over the top.
91 posted on 01/31/2005 5:16:42 PM PST by gidget7
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To: SweetCaroline

Almost every school and college in the country!


92 posted on 01/31/2005 5:18:35 PM PST by gidget7
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To: Modernman
Re:
I'm with Dennis Leary on this one: If I had daughters, I'd almost rather they be into girls during high school and college. You don't have to worry about STD's and pregnancy.
STD's: Ever seen gonorrhea of the throat? I have. One afternoon at the STD clinic as a medical student . . .
Also, lesbians often get: Allergic Vaginitis, Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis, Herpes (Genital) Infections, HIV/AIDS, Human Papillomavirus (HPV)/Genital Warts, Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID), Pubic Lice, Scabies, Syphilis, Trichomoniasis

A study of the Montreal lesbian community found that 88% had been diagnosed with chlamydia.

One more thing, although not completely related: HIV has been isolated from blood, semen, vaginal secretions, saliva, tears, breast milk, CSF, amniotic fluid, and urine.
(Recommendations for prevention of HIV transmission in health care settings. NY State J Med 88:25-31, 1988. Rhame, Postgrad Med 91:141-144, 1992.)


They lied to us in school.
93 posted on 01/31/2005 5:22:35 PM PST by yevgenie (8 bits in a byte; 2 bits to a quarter ($.25) ==> so, 8 bits is a dollar ???)
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To: Modernman
pregnancy no. but STD's, I beg to differ, yes you do. Girls have to be careful with bubble bath! How do you think foreign objects will be accepted by their bodies? Not to mention fists, which btw, cause bleeding. Blood born diseases in a lot of cases are STD's
94 posted on 01/31/2005 5:28:45 PM PST by gidget7
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To: Blood of Tyrants
The following was excerpted from americanwomensuck.com

I am the medical director of our local hospital's intensive/critical care unit (commonly called ICU in medical jargon). My job as medical director is to assure the quality of care given to our patients of whatever age. I also am one of the main physicians who works in the ICU, given my board certifications in pulmonology and critical care medicine.

Last night, I was called into manage a case involving a young patient who had apparently overdosed on some kind of illicit substance. There are a million designer drugs out there, but the one that is currently winding its way through the state college two towns over is Ecstacy. Ecstasy is hardly a benign drug. Ecstacy is technically 2,4-methylenedioxymethamphetamine or MDMA. It is a nerve terminal poison and can cause extensive central nervous system damage in addition to tachyardia (fast heart beat), respiratory problems and potentially cardiovascular collapse if intoxication is not treated. Rapid increases in body temperature and high blood pressure occur and can exacerbate underlying medical conditions. It ain't a pretty picture, men.

Well, my patient turned out to be a 19 year old AW from the state college who had been drinking and doing Ecstasy at a party near town when she collapsed and her "friends" brought her into the ER. I got the call about ten minutes later after they had started ventilatory support and started to treat her tachycardia with standard therapy. Alcohol and Ecstacy are an especially bad combination because death can result from a multitude of causes, but normally from choking on vomit as both are highly emetogenic forms of substance abuse.

While I was examining the patient, I found that she smelled to high heaven of beer and alcohol, was barely dressed despite how cool it was outside, and that her panties were ripped to shreds. In such cases, it is standard operating procedure at the hospital, and in accordance with state law, to ascertain whether a sexual assault may have occurred. The girl was unresponsive and unable to answer, so I had two nurses witness while I did the pelvic. She had signs of serious vaginal trauma that could have indicated potential rape, and semen was visibly leaking. I got the "rape kit" and gathered the necessary evidence and called the police. The police showed up and certified the evidence and procedure with me and the nurses and proceeded to question this young woman's friends.

It turns out that she was drinking and taking ecstacy in high hopes of "pulling a train" , or having sex with multiple partners (unprotected of course) as part of some type of initiation ritual for some type of social group, and her friends that were with her had provided both the drugs and alcohol. Her "big sister" then started screaming at me that I had better save her if I didn't want to be sued for malpractice and that she was going to "f*ck me up" if this sterling example of modern AW-hood was harmed in the long run.

I told the little AW whore that possession of this drug was a felony under state law, that providing alcohol to the underaged was also a crime. I also told her that threatening a physician in the pursuit of his duties was another crime. All of this took place in front of the local police officers, who took the whole drunken and drugged-out lot of three boys and three girls into custody and charged them. The "big sister" also tried to claw her way past me into the ICU to see the young AW and had to be physically restrained when informed that she had no power to approve any treatments for the girl as she was not a relative. I then had the unhappy duty of reporting the girl's condition to her parents, who immediately told me to do whatever it took. Later, the police took the disgusting partiers down to the city jail, where they are suffering extremely bad hangovers after their night of illicit debauchery. They are also facing a minimum of two years each in the state penitentiary for possession of illegal drugs, drunk driving, furnishing alcohol to a minor and making threats to a physician in the performance of his duties. I know the district attorney personally, and I believe he fully intends to make an example of this trash.

This morning, the girl's condition had started to improve but it will be a slow go for her. The parents arrived at the hospital and were there when I went in for my morning rounds. They were in serious denial until I showed them the results of the girl's toxicology screens indicating illicit drug and alcohol. They are still in denial, but they are going down to the jail to see the "friends", who are going to get their asses kicked but good.

Of course, the "big sister" said that the 19 year old AW did all of this voluntarily because she wanted to be a "slut-sister" like the other "slut-sisters" in that social organization.

Makes me glad that I am taking the extra effort to teach my boys right from wrong.

And here's the follow-up:

Well, as of last night we discharged Miss Chemical Dependency to the custody of the state psychiatric facility. She has some cognitive and motor skill deficits from the combination of the MDMA nerve terminal poisoning and anoxia from her breathing difficulties secondary to her intoxication. She will be a guest of the state for a long, long time to come for possession of illicit narcotics, underage alcohol consumption and conspiracy. Her parents were trying like hell to get me to release her directly to her custody, but our county judge ordered her into the state facility and there is no way in heaven that I would foist that piece of rejected flesh back upon an unprepared public.

As for her "friends", you know the ones who she allowed to pressure her into having unprotected sexual intercourse with multiple partners under the influence of illicit narcotics and alcohol, they were charged with the following: supplying alcohol to a minor, supplying/possession/transport of illicit narcotic substances, assault, physical battery, interference with a physician during the performance of emergency duties, driving while intoxicated, sexual assault, interference with a police officer in the performance of official duties, resisting arrest, making false statements and grand theft auto. Seems they forgot to tell the guy who owned the car that they 'borrowed" it. All in all, they are facing a total maximum possible combined sentence of 275 years in prison if convicted. The DA said he will most likely plea bargain it down with a minimum jail time of ten to twenty with 75% of the sentence required before consideration for parole. Basically, the brats are going to the pen for a minimum of 7 1/2 years in prison each. As for Miss Chemical Dependency, she faces a very rough uphill battle. Not only will she be in prison, but she will most likely not be able to do much more than sit in her wheelchair and drool.

All of this because she had to live life at the end of her clitoris rather than showing the spinal fortitude and character to not get involved with such filth to start. What a waste.

95 posted on 01/31/2005 5:37:14 PM PST by handk (The truth is the truth even if no one believes it, and a lie is a lie even if everyone believes it.)
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To: yevgenie; gidget7
And there's more here: Sodomy: A Public Health Risk

There's additional information from the CDC and others but... I'm out of time for now...

96 posted on 01/31/2005 5:41:08 PM PST by scripter (Tens of thousands have left the homosexual lifestyle)
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To: gidget7

>>The verbal sexual content on that show is horrid. The innuendo, and physical stuff, is way over the top. <<<

but, but, but .. that's just modern-day tv!

Consider the new "Desparate Housewives" that is getting such rave reviews.

Dumb dumb .. and setting such a terrible example.

No wonder the Muslims look at America as ungodly with this kind of trash on tv. Although it might not portray the majority of American society, it is often their only reference point.

Back in the 80's, the cat fights on Dynasty were the worst thing you'd see on the air. Now the shows are just beyond any morality .. most of them.

I was watching Bachelorette tonight and thinking .. this woman has already "tried" one man complete with living with him and now she's "trying" more men to find her soulmate. Something is amiss here.


97 posted on 01/31/2005 9:43:50 PM PST by NativeTexun ("If you don't live in Texas, you don't live in the United States.")
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To: gidget7
Your post #89; "Ah but they all know that. They want a voice and a say in OUR reality. And they are getting it too. They keep encouraging this crap, it becomes trendy in school, and they get what they are looking for. We need to get this crap out of the linelight!!!!!"

Concur!

98 posted on 01/31/2005 10:27:26 PM PST by DakotaGator (MSM or OM, it's all the same. They are the "Enemy Within".)
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To: scripter; little jeremiah

As soon as I saw "gender studies and diversity", I knew I was reading a dissertation based on queer liberation ideology. This stuff is the product of 'queer' whims and fancies. It's wishful thinking packaged as "social science."


99 posted on 02/01/2005 5:56:42 AM PST by Lindykim
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To: scripter
In college, some girls get into girls to be chic, elite, and "progressive".
In high school, they do it to get the immediate rapt attention of the guys.
In junior high, they do it to be and popular, because they can play-act like the older girls who are so popular.
Girls Gone Wild commercials show it, guys love it (and go "Woooooooo!"), and it's thus "no big deal".

(As if getting a date without having to compete with the other half of the population wasn't tough enough for us in those years!!!)

100 posted on 02/01/2005 6:08:58 AM PST by Teacher317
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