Posted on 01/22/2002 3:13:55 AM PST by vannrox
And there's nobody in America who would miss you. But for heaven's sake don't inflict yourself on one of our Allies. Move to Sudan or Somalia.
Hit the road altman, you maroon.
No Gosford Park for me.
America wouldn't miss you either, you creep.
Monday, January 21, 2002British generosity
By LOUIS B. HOBSON -- Calgary Sun
HOLLYWOOD -- Robert Altman is pretty certain his award-winning mystery comedy Gosford Park couldn't have been made in America.
He says a great part of the appeal and success of the film is the participation of so many of Britain's premiere stage and screen actors.
Featured in the cast are Maggie Smith, Helen Mirren, Clive Owen, Alan Bates, Emily Watson and Kristin Scott Thomas.
"The thing about British actors is that they are almost all by nature generous people and particularly generous with one another.
"You don't get that in America and I think the real problem is the agent thing. Agents are always out there chasing everything from the biggest salary to the biggest trailer," says Altman.
"Everyone comes with his or her own costume person, hairdresser and trainer. It's a lot of unnecessary people and unnecessary expense.
"I've experienced that and I'll never do it again. That's one of the reasons we set Gosford Park in England.
"I went through the whole celebrity thing with Miss Helen Hunt on Dr. T and the Women. It was horrible.
"It was all about managers and agents coming in and saying Miss Hunt needed this and Miss Hunt needed that.
"We had Dames and Sirs on Gosford Park, but when they got to the set they were all peers and they were all good people.
"It was about the work and the material and the movie and nothing about themselves."
Cheap Shots
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I take it back
After threatening to expatriate themselves if Bush won the election, most would-be celebrity defectors put the back pedal to the metal.
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By Carina Chocano
Jan. 25, 2001 | Confirming once again that no statement has been set in stone since the early days of parchment, it's been a big year for retractions, reversals and capricious changes of heart. Former President Clinton admitted last week to giving false testimony under oath; the Rev. Jesse Jackson reversed his decision to withdraw from public life with record alacrity; and reports of the mass celebrity migration that seemed imminent when several celebrities announced their intention to expatriate themselves should Bush be elected president turned out to have been greatly exaggerated.
The fun began on Aug. 31, when Eddie Vedder told USA Today, "I'm moving to a different country if little Damien II gets elected." This statement was followed by director Robert Altman's announcement on Sept. 6: "If George Bush is elected president, I'm leaving for France." Then, on Sept. 18, the New York Daily News ran an interview from German magazine Focus in which Kim Basinger announced that her husband, Alec Baldwin, "might leave the country if Bush is elected president," adding, "and then I'd probably have to go too." (She has since filed for divorce.)
It could have been an extraordinary television event. ("The heartwarming epic dramatization of the fall of Hollywood to the right-wing has-been phalanx!") Cue clip: In the desperate moments before the final plane leaves Los Angeles International Airport for Charles de Gaulle, throngs of damp, tastefully soiled and tousled personalities fight their way through a thick sea of humanity, tossing babies overhead like tiny sacks of grain, crying "Over there! I think I see a Baldwin! Pass ... the Baldwin ... the child!"
But scare tactics can backfire. On Sept. 19, the Daily News ran the following Baldwin retraction: "I never said I'd leave the country, and my wife never heard of Focus magazine and never talked to them."
Then, on Sept. 20, the Daily News ran the following retraction of the retraction. "Kim did indeed speak to a Focus magazine," he told the paper. "But my wife and I never said unequivocally that we would leave the country if Bush won. Never."
Two days later, on Sept. 22, Altman also retracted his statement, again in the Daily News: "Here's what I really said. I said that if Bush gets elected, I'll move to Paris, Texas, because the state will be better off if he's out of it."
For a while it seemed as though the trend might be reversing itself entirely -- until, on Nov. 3, the Washington Post quoted Kennedy White House press secretary and former ABC News correspondent Pierre Salinger as saying, "I don't want any more Bush presidents. If Bush wins, I'm going to leave the country and spend the rest of my life in France."
By December, the intention to decamp for parts un-Bushed had been ascribed to no fewer than a dozen actors, directors, rock musicians and other recognizable persons, among them Martin Sheen, Rosie O'Donnell, Matt Damon, Whoopi Goldberg, Ed Asner, Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon.
So where are they now? (Or, as our friends in France surely must be asking themselves, "Alors, où est tout le monde maintenant?")
Most of the reports were unsubstantiated. Barbra Streisand, it turns out, had promised to leave the country if George Bush the elder was elected to a second term in 1992, but more recently announced her decision to leave the White House, not the country, for at least four years.
So far, only one threat has resulted in actual relocation. On Dec. 22 the Washington Post's Lloyd Grove caught up with Salinger in the French town of Le Thor ("The Thor"), where Salinger's wife runs a bed and breakfast.
"I'm going to come back to Washington in January to dispose of my apartment in Georgetown," Salinger told Grove, "but otherwise I'll come back here to live for the rest of my life." When asked about Baldwin and Altman, Salinger replied: "I don't know them very well, but if they come here they'll be very welcome. And if you want to come here, it would be very wonderful for us to be together and talk about things."
Whether the invitation reached them is not known, but on Dec. 29, the New York Post's Neal Travis ran the following item:
"One artist keeping his promise to leave the country in the event of a Bush presidency is director Robert Altman. Bob and Kathyrn were in Elaine's the other night with Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, and confirmed they've taken a house in London for the coming year. (Altman's next movie will be filmed there.)"
Last week, "Bob" Altman's publicist denied the story, saying the director was not planning a move. Asked if it would be possible to obtain a statement from Altman, the publicist said, "I can't reach him, he's out of the country."
"Is he in London?"
"He's -- overseas."
Sarandon and Robbins, a publicist for the couple said last week, aren't going anywhere. "They have a lot of projects lined up here for next year."
Baldwin, who also is not going anywhere, has been flooded by hundreds of "horrid and gratuitous" letters encouraging his exile since the unfortunate misunderstanding first occurred. In an ironic, last-minute and perhaps conciliatory twist, the Creative Coalition, an arts advocacy group co-founded by Baldwin, Whoopi Goldberg and Ron Silver, hosted the "First Party: Bi-Partisan Celebrity Inaugural Event" Saturday night. Among the guests were Creative Coalition president Billy Baldwin; Ron Reagan, son of the former president; Arianna Huffington; Joe Piscopo; Bo Derek; and one-time presidential hopeful Sen. Arlen Specter.
No one was injured.
Meanwhile, Vedder's publicist declined to respond to inquiries about whether Vedder is still planning a move, or indeed if little Damien II has in fact been elected.
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Yeah, and the blindfolds...uh, eye coverings, would keep from seeing the American flag!
Not to mention, he (like me, unfortunately!) looks like he could benefit from the "three squares" the Gitmo guys are getting!
10 celebrity candidates for exile if Bush wins
Showbiz luminaries are threatening to leave the U.S. if the Republican candidate is elected. Here's one writer's passenger list for the first flight out.
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By Carina Chocano
Sep. 20, 2000 | HOLLYWOOD, Calif. -- Recently, a spate of Hollywood luminaries have threatened to go into self-imposed exile should George W. Bush be elected to the nation's top post in November. Director Robert Altman kicked off the trend earlier this month, when he announced his intention to move to France should Bush defeat Al Gore.
"If George Bush is elected president, I'm leaving for France," said the director, speaking from France.
Not to be outdone, Alec Baldwin, the "biggest moralist" Kim Basinger knows, threatened to follow suit. A tentative Basinger then realized: "I guess I would have to go too." The foiled Baldwin has since retracted his earlier statement.
But even foreign Americans are jumping on the bandwagon. Elton John, speaking at a fundraiser for the vice president, expressed his concern about America, a place where "hundreds of friends live." Stating that he "did not want this country to have to live under George W. Bush," John declared himself to be "a great believer in the vice president," adding "His views completely coincide with mine."
John, a British subject, is not eligible to run for office in the U.S. However, should his self-described surrogate be defeated in November, we may experience an unexpected boon in "celebrity" defections.
"The vice president ... wants this country to go forward," John said, "and if you vote for him, it will go forward. But it's back to the Dark Ages, I'm afraid, if you vote for the other guy."
Will a victory for the Shrub cost the nation Michael Douglas? Perhaps, but if so, W. would be a small price to pay.
Every dark cloud, after all, has a silver lining, so here's hoping our loss is also France's.
Top 10 celebrities we hope will leave the country if George W. Bush is elected President:
No. 10 Barbra Streisand: Furious at Loretta Lynn for hogging Lincoln Bedroom.
No. 9 Bill Clinton: Terrified of furious Barbra Streisand.
No. 8 Julie Chen: Marked for banishment regardless.
No. 7 The entire Baldwin family: Why stop at just two?
No. 6 Jerry Lewis: They asked for it.
No. 5 Britney Spears.
No. 4 Britney Spears: Oops, we did it again.
No. 3 Madonna: Seizing opportunity to reinvent herself as "French Madonna"
No. 2 Oprah Winfrey: Bush's aversion to "psychobabble" untenable.
No. 1 George W. Bush: He's just dumb enough to do it.
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Don't let the door hit you in the butt on the way out, dude. Ten to one he shelters his money somewhere other than England, though. After all, ideals are lovely, but good tax rates, well you can't really expect people like Altman and Streisand to support the little people, right?
Please do, Altman.
Set up a commune with Cher, Alec Baldwin, Streisand, Johnny Depp, and all the other dirtbags who run down the country which has given them so much. Memo to US airport security : if Altman changes his mind, give him a cavity search he won't believe, okay?
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