[buccaneer81]

At least the guys in the article can afford it. How about the poor stiff who's wife leaves him through no fault of his own? If he's got two kids, he'll be lucky to see them more than four or five days a month. And if he brings home $3000 a month, he's going to pay at least half of that in child support while his ex continues working at her $40000 a year job.

[IronJack]

Yep. THAT'S the real crime here. Women now have the same earning power as men, yet it is automatically assumed that the woman will get custody in a divorce, and that the man has to pay for the difference.

To stop this outrage, men need to be willing to shoulder the responsibility for their children. Demand that your attorney seek at least joint custody. Then, in most states, the only child support you can be assessed is an equitable division of the child's costs based on income.

As to alimony, that's simply the same fee hookers are paid, with the government acting as pimp.

[afraidfortherepublic]

And if he brings home $3000 a month, he's going to pay at least half of that in child support while his ex continues working at her $40000 a year job.

Sue for full custody. If you don't think you can handle that, sue for joint custody (50%/50%).

Nobody pays anybody anything. You make an agreement of how to split major expenses such as medical, dental, orthadontia, and school clothes, supplies, and tuition. There is an agreement about who declares the child on their income tax. Sometimes this means you declare the child in alternate years. Of course you have to live near your ex souse -- probably in the same school district for this to work. And you have to remain on civil terms.

[conservative cat]

And if he brings home $3000 a month, he's going to pay at least half of that in child support while his ex continues working at her $40000 a year job

Well, as a female living in Washington state, it's the opposite. They have charts that set out the prescribed amount of child support based on total combined income, then they give each person a percent they are responsible for- based on their percent of that income. It makes it more fair for the husband when the woman works and makes good money, but it rewards women who don't take initiative to support themselves.

For instance, my brother in-law pays his ex-wife double what my husband would pay me, although they make close to the same amount- all because I stay employed.

[abclily]

Is the law the same for all states? Is there a state where wages are not garnished? Anybody know? I know a young man who is paying child support to where he barely has enough left for groceries. The mother of the two children lives in state-subsidized rent, has 3 cars in the parking lot (one that was brand new in 1999 that she paid cash for), refuses to work, and has the father's wages garnished. Is there any help anywhere for a person in this situation?

[CDHart]

"How about the poor stiff who's wife leaves him through no fault of his own?"

I work with a woman whose husband left her and the two kids for someone who "paid more attention to him." The husband also works where the wife and I work (interesting situation, and I try not to take sides). He resents paying anything toward the support of the family he abandoned.

OTOH, my son-in-law has paid for years and years to the child support mess in California. His wife left him and took the kids. California charges interest on child support. Now that the kids are 18, he is finally out from under it.

There is no fair solution to these dilemmas, except to return to the obligations of husband and wife, and the duty to their children as outlined in the Bible, the original owner's manual.

Carolyn