This Might Be the Wokest Confession of Sin Ever Recited in a “Church”

Disntr ^ | August 26, 2024 | staff

[Morgana]

“Reverend” Caroline Unzaga—ever heard of her? No? Well, that’s understandable, given that she’s the latest in a long line of clergy more interested in appeasing the ever-ravenous gods of wokeness than actually preaching the gospel, not that she’s qualified to do so. Unzaga hails her tripe from the Brick Presbyterian Church, which, judging by this spectacle, seems to have swapped out bricks for cardboard in the foundation of its theology.

Imagine this. You stroll into church on Sunday morning, expecting to hear something that, oh I don’t know, resembles actual Christian teaching. But instead, you’re greeted by the dulcet tones of Unzaga leading her congregation in a confession of sin—a moment that traditionally calls for some introspection about, say, the Ten Commandments or perhaps the Sermon on the Mount.

But no, that would be far too straightforward for our intrepid “reverend.”

She starts off seemingly well enough, even making you think this might be an orthodox moment, “Merciful God, you have commanded us to love you above all and to have no other gods.” Sounds about right, doesn’t it?

But then, it all goes sideways faster than you can say “cultural Marxism” as Unzaga pivots into a full-throated wail against the so-called sins of “racial and ethnic privileging,” “gender exclusivity,” and “nationalistic imperialism.”

First, we get the nod to “prosperity and materialism,” which, while a bit of a cliche, is at least in the ballpark of biblical concerns. But what follows is a descent into the fever dreams of academia’s most progressive departments—racial and ethnic privileging? Gender exclusivity? Nationalistic imperialism? What Bible is she reading from? The Gospel according to Karl Marx?

The only thing missing was a confession for the original sin of not having signed up for the latest DEI seminar.

[Flavious_Maximus]

I would bet this “Reverend” has had multiple abortions, and numerous sexual encounters with the pool boy and landscaper.

The exact type that the Presbyterian Church wants administering their flock. /spit

[Leep]

What an odd name .. Caroline.

[Morgana]

My thoughts as I was posting this? We all know this is wrong but young people who are un-schooled in the Bible don’t know that.

More and more of her kind are in churches leading people astray. Leading young and old to hell. Worst of all it’s like it changed over night. I don’t remember this when I was little.

[chajin]

Was she predestined to become a wokespokejoke?

Remeber, tulips are better than one...

[Major Matt Mason]

Marxists have taken over most of our institutions, including churches/religion. I personally don't waste my time with attending church anymore since the church services are no longer religious, but are political.

[No name given]

This so called reverend is a heretic.

[Seruzawa]

I’m assuming she never mentioned the 10 Suggestions.

[arthurus]

There is none of that in the Orthodox churches or the Latin Mass Catholic churches.

[Gay State Conservative]

No,it’s now 9 Suggestions.Adultery was long ago officially dropped by “progressive” churches.

[IamConservative]

Wokeism seems like a form of arrested development in my view. Perhaps identity politics in general. It is like they want High School to be real life. Meanwhile, the rest of matured and hate the idea of going through HS again.

[Seruzawa]

Thanks for the update. Being old school Missouri Synod Lutheran I still think infidelity to be a terrible crime. I guess I haven’t been enlightened. Ruined marriages and lives apparently don’t upset the Presbyterians any more. The benefits of adultery seem elusive to me. I guess I need some reeducation.

[Southside_Chicago_Republican]

I visited a United Methodist church years ago on “Social Justice Sunday”, and they had a similar “confession.” It occurred to me that I was made to confess a lot of things I hadn’t done. That’s why I like this one from the :Book of Common Prayer”, which allows a person to think about his actual sins and confess them:

Almighty and most merciful Father,
we have erred, and strayed from thy ways like lost sheep.
We have followed too much the devices and desires
of our own hearts.
We have offended against thy holy laws.
We have left undone those things
which we ought to have done;
and we have done those things
which we ought not to have done;
and there is no health in us.
But thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us, miserable offenders.
Spare thou them, O God, which confess their faults.
Restore thou them that are penitent;
according to thy promises declared unto mankind
in Christ Jesu our Lord.
And grant, O most merciful Father, for his sake,
that we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life,
to the glory of thy holy name.
Amen.

If your actual sins include “white privelege”, then you can so confess. If not, then you don’t.

[jjotto]

Nice to hear.

Likely inspired by the Jewish Tachanun prayer, a penitent supplication recited most weekdays.

https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/5776805/jewish/Tachanun.htm

[Southside_Chicago_Republican]

Interesting!