Posted on 03/10/2016 7:38:09 AM PST by Gamecock
They say you can’t judge a book by its cover. That may be true, but disregarding it entirely is equally as big of a mistake—especially when the cover has a dude rocking a windbreaker so fly that an Urban Outfitters employee would be jealous (see below).
We’ve spent the last several weeks (yesterday afternoon), searching the labyrinth-like halls of the world’s most intricate libraries (Google) to create this list of mind-bending (somewhat entertaining) Christian book covers.
As the subtitle makes clear, this is actually serious business. Image
Admit it. You want to read this one. Image
This one gets a spot solely on the merits of Beau’s shirt choice and his custom, Jesus-fish CB radio thing. Image
OK, we’re just going to be honest here. We have no idea if there are any religious implications to David Arora’s tome about consuming wild mushrooms, and we have no reason to believe there are any. But honestly, how could you see this cover and not include it? Image
Real talk: That’s actually a pretty dope jogging suit. Image
Finally, someone asking the theological questions we've all been thinking. Image
In all fairness, Ruth may be a perfectly entertaining Amish romance novel. But why did they pick a cover photo where Ruth looks disappointed with you for reading it? Image
OK, so maybe this one isn't mind-bending in the traditional sense, but it presents a bold truth so few are willing to face: Let’s face the facts, wind surfing is a one-person sport. You’re just out of luck, married people. Image
According to the cover of this "teen devotional," the secret to being cool is to be a teen who looks like he is a 27-year-old John Tesh. Image
Sure, there’s nothing overtly Christian about this book, aside from the fact that a lot of funerals take place at church and are presided over by a minister. That’s beside the point. (You’ve just spent the last two minutes reading a list of mind-bending old book covers, so, honestly who cares at this point? Seriously, what are we doing with our lives?) If the title of the book contains the words “Fancy Coffins," then it better show a pretty darn fancy coffin. The choice is no less than baffling. Image
We’re not even sure where to begin here. Image
Anyone remember when Archie comics had some Christian releases? I still remember the covers of some of those til today!
Jesus is in the microwave?
This is the prophetic one about Trump, right?
I’m guessing some cheese exploded and created an apparition?
Amish Vampires in Space? I honestly thought that was a joke until I checked Amazon.com. It just sounded too weird to be real.
http://www.amazon.com/Amish-Vampires-Space-Kerry-Nietz/dp/0983965552
I guess Amish will go to space only if they become vampires first?
..I guess Amish will go to space only if they become vampires first....
If the ‘’Most interesting man in the world’’ can go into space without becoming a vampire, so can the Amish.
This series isn't even the one I saw in the library; there are two authors doing this.
“Ruth” looks to be about 50 years old. The vampire in space is better looking.
As for “Awesome” - is that a boy or girl in the sweater looking longingly at the frat boy?
There is an Amish romance genre, and there is a vampire romance genre, and now there is Amish vampire romance, that is not satire or parody.
Here is the whole boxed set for the Amish collection. At least two of them look happier than poor Ruth.
To #12
Naomi looks a bit Hispanic, doesn’t she?
I think one would be hard pressed to find any of these books at a Christian bookstore, especially the silly notion of an “Amish vampire”.
Probably correct!
I had no idea!
You don’t live in Texas, do you. Compare her to Miriam and Ruth. That isn’t a tan from hanging out the wash.
Speaking of pictures - the CB guy reminds me of Jim Jones of ‘Jonestown’ infamy.
Lived in San Antonio for a while. You make a great point!
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