How can anyone live a chaste life? What can help?
Someone lives chastely when he is free to be loving and is not the slave of his drives and emotions. Anything, therefore, that helps one to become a more mature, freer, and more loving person and to form better relationships helps that person to love chastely, also. One becomes free to be loving through self-discipline, which one must acquire, practice, and maintain at every stage of life. It is helpful for me in this regard to obey God's commandments in all situations, to avoid temptations and any form of double life or hypocrisy, and to ask God for protection against temptations and to strengthen me in love. Being able to live out a pure and undivided love is ultimately a grace and a wonderful gift of God.
Does everybody have to be chaste, even married people?
Yes, every Christian should be loving and chaste, whether he is young or old, lives alone or is married. Not everyone is called to marriage, but everyone is called to love. We are destined to give our lives away; many do so in the form of marriage, others in the form of voluntary celibacy for the sake of the kingdom of heaven, others by living alone and yet being there for others. All human life finds its meaning in love. To be chaste means to love with an undivided heart. The unchaste person is torn and not free. Someone who loves authentically is free, strong, and good; he can devote himself in love. Thus Christ, who gave himself up completely for us and at the same time devoted himself completely to his Father in heaven, is a model of chastity, because he is the original model of strong love. (YOUCAT questions 405-406)
Dig Deeper: CCC section (2338-2345) and other references here.
Part 3: Life in Christ (1691 - 2557)
Section 2: The Ten Commandments (2052 - 2557)
Chapter 2: You Shall Love Your Neighbor as Yourself (2196 - 2557)
Article 6: The Sixth Commandment (2331 - 2400)
Jesus said to his disciples: "Love one another even as I have loved you."1 ⇡
You shall not commit adultery.113
You have heard that it was said, "You shall not commit adultery." But I say to you that every one who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.114 ⇡
II. THE VOCATION TO CHASTITY ⇡
The integrity of the person ⇡
The chaste person maintains the integrity of the powers of life and love placed in him. This integrity ensures the unity of the person; it is opposed to any behavior that would impair it. It tolerates neither a double life nor duplicity in speech.125
1.
113.
114.
125.
Cf. Mt 5:37.
Chastity includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery which is a training in human freedom. The alternative is clear: either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy.126 "Man's dignity therefore requires him to act out of conscious and free choice, as moved and drawn in a personal way from within, and not by blind impulses in himself or by mere external constraint. Man gains such dignity when, ridding himself of all slavery to the passions, he presses forward to his goal by freely choosing what is good and, by his diligence and skill, effectively secures for himself the means suited to this end."127
126.
Cf. Sir 1:22.
127.
GS 17.
Whoever wants to remain faithful to his baptismal promises and resist temptations will want to adopt the means for doing so: self-knowledge, practice of an ascesis adapted to the situations that confront him, obedience to God's commandments, exercise of the moral virtues, and fidelity to prayer. "Indeed it is through chastity that we are gathered together and led back to the unity from which we were fragmented into multiplicity."128
128.
St. Augustine, Conf. 10,29,40:PL 32,796.
The virtue of chastity comes under the cardinal virtue of temperance, which seeks to permeate the passions and appetites of the senses with reason.
Self-mastery is a long and exacting work. One can never consider it acquired once and for all. It presupposes renewed effort at all stages of life.129 The effort required can be more intense in certain periods, such as when the personality is being formed during childhood and adolescence.
129.
Cf. Titus 2:1-6.
Chastity has laws of growth which progress through stages marked by imperfection and too often by sin. "Man ... day by day builds himself up through his many free decisions; and so he knows, loves, and accomplishes moral good by stages of growth."130
130.
FC 34.
Chastity represents an eminently personal task; it also involves a cultural effort, for there is "an interdependence between personal betterment and the improvement of society."131 Chastity presupposes respect for the rights of the person, in particular the right to receive information and an education that respect the moral and spiritual dimensions of human life.
131.
GS 25 § 1.
Chastity is a moral virtue. It is also a gift from God, a grace, a fruit of spiritual effort.132 The Holy Spirit enables one whom the water of Baptism has regenerated to imitate the purity of Christ.133
132.
Cf. Gal 5:22.
133.
Cf. 1 Jn 3:3.