Posted on 04/21/2014 3:56:43 PM PDT by NYer
From a reader…
QUAERITUR:
I have been asked to be my nieces godmother but I have to make my confirmation. The lady at the church [?] told me I can not do so until I have my marriage convalidated by the church. I have talked to several people and they find that odd. My husband (who is Methodist) is going to be the godfather is weary about it finds it extremely odd as well. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.
I’m not sure who the “lady at the church” is – and sometimes these nameless and titleless people can have some odd ideas – but here, the lady at the church seems to be right on point.
If one is Catholic, one is bound to have one’s marriage celebrated in the Church. This is not just a matter of canon law, though that it important. This is a matter of following the Church’s teachings on marriage. We must also attend to the traditional Precepts or Commandments of the Church.
To be a confirmation sponsor, one must be a baptized and a confirmed Catholic in good standing. That only makes sense. How can one be a source of encouragement and guidance to the Catholic life for neophytes if one is not fully living a Catholic life oneself?
Getting your marriage convalidated (which is not just getting the marriage “blessed”, for you’ll be instructed and asked to place a new act of consent as you are entering into something new) will allow you to return to the reception of the sacraments of reconciliation and Holy Communion.
I presume that you’ve been informed that if your marriage is not recognized by the Church, you are not able to receive the sacraments.
If one wanted to be a godparent, one would similarly want to receive the sacrament of Confirmation and have one’s marriage celebrated in the Church as well.
Do not fall into the trap of seeing any of this as a “burden” or a “hoop” to jump through. This all makes perfectly good sense.
Another quick point: your husband, who is not Catholic, will technically not be a godparent, but a “Christian witness” to the baptism. Only those who are fully initiated Catholics can serve as godparents. A godparent is there to serve as a guide for the child in the Catholic life. Only those who are living the Catholic life can provide that service.
“I don’t need permission of the bishop for anything.”
Yeah, actually you do for a number of things in the Church.
“My impression too from looking at the canon law site.”
That’s what I always thought too.
Can't quite picture how that would happen. Who is my bishop? I don't belong to any parish, nor am on the records of any diocese. I do not and will not attend Masses or ceremonies of any kind given by the apostacized Church (post Vatican II). I suppose we have a "virtual" parish, who get together to attend TLM Mass given by traveling priests. But I do not a priori and necessarily accept the authority of any bishop (or pope) ordained after the early 60s (the closest one was, no doubt; he is young).
The church is free to consider that we are not married; just living at two different ends of a house with shared rent. That pretty much sums it up. Maybe an FSSP priest can talk us into something else at some point, but we have no easy geographic access to one now. Plus he would have to give us hints he is not really into the post-conciliar thing.
I really don’t care what you do. It’s your soul.
What's the disposition of the soul got to do with it? We are chaste, no kids between us; I was never married before. So what's the problem? Room mates. Pew Mates.
Pre-1960, although I was just a baby, I would have tried to follow the rules by the letter.
It’s helped me for the same reason, but after some more research just now on the subject, according to Canon Law only one godparent is technically required for baptism (as the godparent is actually technically speaking the sponsor for the baby, the parents are not the sponsors) so in mixed marriages, as long as the couple understands only the Catholic of the two can be the godparent, there is no problem. The spouse of the Catholic can serve as a “Christian witness” (as FR. Z states) if he/she desires during the ceremony, but can’t be a godparent.
See here for more info: http://www.catholiceducation.org/articles/religion/re0233.html
“Can’t quite picture how that would happen. Who is my bishop?”
Whoever the bishop of your diocese is. Ask your FSSP priest. He’ll tell you.
” But I do not a priori and necessarily accept the authority of any bishop (or pope) ordained after the early 60s (the closest one was, no doubt; he is young). “
Then you’re not a practicing Catholic. You’re a sedevacantist.
“What’s the disposition of the soul got to do with it?”
No practicing Catholic would ask that question because he would know.
“Pre-1960, although I was just a baby, I would have tried to follow the rules by the letter.”
The rules on Josephite marriage have not changed.
I don't have a diocese. I am itinerant regarding assisting at particular Masses. I hope some day to visit an FSSP parish.
Then you’re not a practicing Catholic. You’re a sedevacantist.
Negative, I have not affirmed the Chair is vacant.
No practicing Catholic would ask that question because he would know.
Seriously, you're saying that anyone who marries into a chaste relationship without consulting a bishop is going to hell? So NOT doing something which would be sinful (without marriage) is sinful? LOL You've got to be joking. Even Francis would not say such an absurd thing.
The only applicable suggestion (not given by you) is to have the marriage blessed. I do not have a "Catholic" marriage and did not intend to, could not have had one because I did not intend to have progeny due to circumstances of which you are not aware. I do not believe God condemns me to hell because of those circumstances beyond my control.
“I don’t have a diocese.”
You don’t live in a diocese?
“I am itinerant regarding assisting at particular Masses.”
Itinerant regarding assisting at particular Masses? Do you live in a diocese?
“I hope some day to visit an FSSP parish.”
So you’re “itinerant regarding assisting at particular Masses” but you’ve never been to an FSSP parish?
“Negative, I have not affirmed the Chair is vacant.”
Then you’re a de facto sedevacantist. The difference is negligible.
“Seriously, you’re saying that anyone who marries into a chaste relationship without consulting a bishop is going to hell?”
Is that even remotely what I said? Where did I mention hell? Are you now going to act like a Protestant anti-Catholic and make things up out of thin air?
“So NOT doing something which would be sinful (without marriage) is sinful?”
Not necessarily sinful, but if you need permission, you need permission. If you need permission and have been told that (and we’ve told you that) then shouldn’t you look into it? That’s what a faithful Catholic would do. What will you do?
“LOL You’ve got to be joking.”
Nope. What part of “you apparently need permission for that” do you not understand? You sound no different than any cafeteria Catholic.
“Even Francis would not say such an absurd thing.”
That’s POPE Francis. And yes, he would say the same thing I just did.
“The only applicable suggestion (not given by you) is to have the marriage blessed.”
That’s not the only applicable suggestion but I could see where a cafeteria Catholic or de facto sedevacantist might see reality that way.
“I do not have a “Catholic” marriage and did not intend to,”
That’s odd for someone who has claimed to be Catholic on his own profile page: “I am a circa 1950’s traditional Catholic. . . Catholics and Catholicism must remain steadfast over time, refusing to comport with the constantly renewed evils of popular culture.”
“could not have had one because I did not intend to have progeny due to circumstances of which you are not aware.”
Circumstances are not at issue here. You either have a Catholic marriage or you don’t. Don’t claim you have a Josephite Marriage - which is a Catholic practice albeit uncommon - if you’re going to turn around and say, “I do not have a “Catholic” marriage and did not intend to,”
“I do not believe God condemns me to hell because of those circumstances beyond my control.”
Positively consenting to a marriage is NEVER beyond your control. Your comments make no sense. You claim you got what you intended. That means it was within your control. Your “marriage” may not condemn you. Your actions - in which you don’t believe Church laws and practices apply to you and you do whatever you want - might.
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