[Alex Murphy]

In an attempt to head off a tidal wave of lawsuits stemming from the sexual abuse of children by priests within the Roman Catholic Church, and Rome’s attempt to cover up the crimes, the Vatican is planning to replace all priests with robots....

....The church has been developing robot priests for the past two years, Batelli said. A live test took place recently in Japan, he said. In the ceremony, which was held in a restaurant to avoid protests from devout Catholics, bride Satoko Inouye was married to her groom Tomohiro Shibata by I-Fairy, a four-foot robot wearing a wreath of flowers. This was the first time a marriage had been led by a robot, according to a statement issued by RoboPriest Japan, a joint venture between the Vatican and robot manufacturer Kokoro Co.

[USMCPOP]

Father Bender

[CynicalBear]

If the robot is on wheels does that make it a holy roller?

[surroundedbyblue]

What’s sad is that there are people who would actually believe this drivel. Zero concept of what the priesthood actually is. Very sad.

[roamer_1]

Coin operated, no doubt... :P

[MetaThought]

And when the time is right, the Robots will rise up and help the Pope recapture Europe.

[don-o]

Been a while since we had a good robot thread

------------------------------------------

Guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender.

The robot says, "What will you have?" The guy says, "Martini." The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man, "What's your IQ?" The guy says, "168". The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology.

The guy leaves, but he is curious, so he goes back into the bar. The robot bartender says," What will you have?" The guy says, "Martini". Again, the robot makes a great martini, gives it to the man and says, "What's your IQ?" The guy says, "100." The robot then starts to talk about NASCAR, Budweiser and John Deere tractors.

The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time. He goes back into the bar. The robot says, "What will you have?" The guy says, "Martini", and the robot brings him another great martini. The robot then says, "What's your IQ?" The guy says, "Uh, about 50." The robot leans in real close and says, "So, you people still happy you voted for Obama?"

[Natural Law]

"In an attempt to head off a tidal wave of lawsuits stemming from the sexual abuse of children by priests within the Roman Catholic Church, and Rome’s attempt to cover up the crimes, the Vatican is planning to replace all priests with robots...."

Is it ironic or iconic that you would stoop to posting from a source like "Lying Dog News" without identifying it as humor or sarcasm?. Do you think you have an obligation to post that this is a site not unlike the Onion or are you comfortable with inferring or implying that this is a legitimate story?

From their website: Lying Dog News: What You Need to Know But They Won’t Tell You.

Lying Dog News provides a refreshing and provocative take on news, trends, pop culture, current events, politics, sports and entertainment.

Unlike the mainstream media which strives to present a factual representation of life on Earth while often falling woefully short, Lying Dog News has as its mission to always fall woefully short of the truth, often in spectacularly entertaining ways.

[Salvation]

The priest is an alter Christus, another Christ, due to his Sacrament of Holy Orders.

I did see the humor marked on this, but you are playing with fire in blaspheming the Catholic Church in such a way.

Lord, have mercy.

[RedStateRocker]

There is nothing new under the sun :-)

The ancient Greeks had a coin operated Holy Water dispenser, designed by Heron around AD 60

http://www.smith.edu/hsc/museum/ancient_inventions/hsc18b.htm

[smvoice]

It's all coming together now. The current pope will retire and be replaced by a Popebot. "Peter" The RO-MAN.

Can it be any CLEARER???!

[Joan Kerrey]

Good grief!!!
Next we’ll hear about robotic molestation in the church.

[dead]

The author forgot the first rule of comedy.

[count-your-change]

“Lying Dog News”? I think the dog has a hold on my pants leg and is giving it a small tug! Yeeehawww!

[blue-duncan]

Why not? With a system in place, ex opere operato, (the built in efficacy of a sacrament properly conferred) why can’t a robot that’s properly programmed suffice?

[wmfights]

LOL

[metmom]

I see your thread is bringing out the best in people.

Flame Warriors The Crybaby

[markomalley]

Cute article.

I wonder when the Onion picks it up and it goes viral.

[montyspython]

Calling Frank Zappa...

[Quix]

Have been resisting entering the fray on this great humor thread . . .

However, given the obnoxious whining on the part of the usual ranters and spewers . . . it does get tempting.

[stboz]

Excitate Mojo

Let's play Dominoes......

Whaddya mean "He's not home?"

Tell Him to come to the damn door.