When attending Mass becomes an occasion of sin

To Renew America ^ | August 20, 2011 | Matt C. Abbott

[markomalley]

From Jim Baltrinic (slightly edited):

'This post consists of excerpts from a letter I wrote to the pastor of a Catholic parish about a certain incident that occurred at his church. I have omitted all references as to the church's location. The church is semi-circular in design, and we were sitting in the last pew near the center isle, which afforded us a clear view of almost the entire congregation. I started my letter with a compliment as to how nice the newly-remodeled church looked. I then ask the pastor to please consider the following hypothetical situation.



'A priest enters the confessional for the usual Saturday morning or afternoon confession time. During this time a young man enters the confessional. 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.' From the sound of the voice on the other side of the screen, the priest surmises that the person is a teenager or young adult. The confession continues: 'It was a week since my last confession. I'm guilty of many lustful thoughts, and I looked at some very immodestly dressed women more times than I should have.'



'The priest asks, 'Were these impure thoughts related to these women you looked at'?



''Yes,' replies the young man.



'The priest: 'Why did you continue to look at them? Why didn't you go someplace else, away from them?'



''I couldn't,' said the young man. 'They were in front of me and I was kind of hemmed in by the crowd.'



'The priest: 'Why were you in such a place to begin with? Do you remember that we are to avoid places that may be an occasion of sin?'



'The young man answers, "Yes, Father, I know that, but I had to be there.'



'The priest, somewhat puzzled, then asks: 'Why did you have to be there, and where were you: at the beach; at a sporting event?'



''No, Father,' said the young man, 'I was at your noon Mass last Sunday, and two scantily-dressed girls were sitting in the pew right in front of me, along with their parents. I couldn't move because my parents were on either side of me.'



'While I said that the above story was hypothetical, in reality it is not. The Mass in question took place this past July at a prominent Catholic parish in a town my wife and I were visiting. It was the main Mass of the day and the church was quite full.



'The young man in the confessional could have been any one of the many young men in the church. The two 'scantily clad' girls were real and were sitting about six pews in front of us with their parents.



'From the area where we were sitting, we observed, in addition to the two girls mentioned above, approximately a dozen very immodestly dressed women, with the majority of these being young girls in their teens and early twenties. Bare backs and shoulders, low-cut tops, strapless sun suits, short shorts, mini-skirts and tight-fitting tops were plainly visible.



'Two years ago, at a parish in northern Virginia, we experienced an almost identical incident at Sunday Mass. We were sitting in our pew when a home-schooling family came in and took a place several pews ahead of us. They had two sons around age 10 and three younger daughters. A few minutes later, two young girls, of about the same age and manner of dress as the two described above, came in and sat in the pew directly in front of this family. However, in this case, the parents quickly recognized the spiritual danger these two improperly dressed girls posed for their children, and they immediately got up and moved to another part of the church.



'It is a sad state of affairs when going to Sunday Mass becomes an occasion of sin. I could go on with more such examples, but I think what I have said is sufficient. What we find more lamentable is the fact that, in many cases, such young girls are in the company of their parents. What does this tell us? Simply this: When it comes to modesty in dress, most parents don't have a clue as to what is right.



'Coincidentally, several days later, as I was about half-way through the composition of my letter to the pastor, my wife saw a notice in the bulletin about appropriate dress in church. The notice was good, especially the part about adults giving good example for young children. It did, however, have two shortcomings which are common to such notices. Many times a bulletin notice can be overlooked, and secondly, the notice called for wearing 'appropriate attire.'



'The problem, as I pointed out above, is that most Catholics have a very poor understanding of what 'appropriate attire' means. When it comes to knowing what is or isn't modest, they have no idea. This is because the Church has been silent on this subject for over 40 years.



'At the beginning of summer there should be a strong sermon on this issue with a clear explanation as to what constitutes 'appropriate attire.' This should be followed up with at least a verbal reminder given once a month from the pulpit. Putting an occasional notice in the bulletin just doesn't do it. It should also be emphasized that the standards for modesty apply to everyday dress, not just in church on Sunday. Mention should also be made about the way many parents dress their little girls in skimpy outfits, thus accustoming them to immodesty at a very early age.



'In regard to this particular topic, I feel I'd be remiss if I failed to mention the disgraceful display of immodesty exhibited by brides and their bridal parties at most Catholic weddings today. At a wedding we recently attended, the comment was made that the bride and bridal party looked more like the Playboy Review than an occasion of Holy Matrimony.



'Let me close with the following thought. Someone once asked the mother of St. Maria Goretti how she was able to raise such a [holy] child. She replied, 'By teaching her the virtue of modesty.' How many Maria Goretti's are parishes and Catholic schools producing today?'

[Ax]

While stationed in Havana, we attended St. Rita's, a short walk from our house. The girls more often than not wore tube-tops and very short shorts. The men normally wore guayabera shirts. And instead of shaking hands at the offering of a sign of peace, most men gave the revolutionary sign: an extended fist.

At the main cathedral in the Plaza de la Catedral, there are signs in English and Spanish advising that men must wear long trousers, and womens' blouses should have sleeves. Since I never wore long trou while off duty, I never got inside the Catedral.

[stuartcr]

So you really believe that it’s a sin?

Do Jewish people believe the same?

[353FMG]

What kind of inane question is that?

Ever heard of discipline in mind and body? Ever heard of showing RESPECT of the Blessed Sacrament? Ever heard of parents giving good examples to their children?

I take it you know nothing about the pre-Vatican II days. Saturdays were the days that confession was heard. One had to stand in a long line to get to the confessional. Many did not receive Communion the next day because they knew that they were not a state of grace (a private matter that is not part of this discussion).

Today, the confessionals are empty but every body receives Communion. You’re probably going to tell me that we have become a holier people since Vat.Counc.II. and are therefore not as much in need of the Sacrament of Penance.

Yeah, right.

[Pyro7480]

Women look just plain...feminine in their chapel veils.

[Pyro7480]

He also said, “Go and sin no more.” He also said, “He that shall scandalize one of these little ones that believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone should be hanged about his neck, and that he should be drowned in the depth of the sea.”

[dfwgator]

‘Cause that’s what they taught us; it’s what’s in your mind that counts; your intentions, that’s how we’ll judge you. What you want to do. Mortal sin had to be a grievous offense, sufficient reflection and full consent of the will. Ya had’ta WANNA! In fact, WANNA was a sin all by itself. “Thou Shalt Not WANNA”. If you woke up in the morning and said, “I’m going down to 42nd street and commit a mortal sin!” Save your car fare; you did it, man! Absolutely!
It was a sin for you to wanna feel up Ellen. It was a sin for you to plan to feel up Ellen. It was a sin for you to figure out a place to feel up Ellen. It was a sin to take Ellen to the place to feel her up. It was a sin to try to feel her up and it was a sin to feel her up. There were six sins in one feel, man!

- George Carlin

[Pyro7480]

You should brush up on your Torah and see proscriptions it has just for clothing.

[stuartcr]

I just can’t understand why looking at a woman lustfully is any kind of a sin or actual adultery.

[OpusatFR]

“Looking at girls and having lustful thoughts, is really a sin?”

Anyone can have a physical and emotional reaction. The sin occurs when one entertains the thoughts, emotions, feelings and you keep looking and desiring the “view.”

You reaction reduces that young lady to a mere object instead of one of God’s creations.

[Alas Babylon!]

Jeesh! Didn't Jummy Carter explain this in 1976?

Matthew Chapter 5, Verse 28: Jesus: "But I say to you, that whosoever shall look on a woman to lust after her, hath already committed adultery with her in his heart."

It's a tough one, but He said it. It always seems to get me in trouble!

[NavyCanDo]

Here is a novel idea. Maybe we should require women in Church to wear full head to toe body coverings so we men can’t be tempted to still a glance. Wait, a second, I think a religion has already run with that idea. And look how that is working out.
I’m not Catholic so I can’t speak for the confessional requirements, but this to me sounds like wishing Jesus was just a little bit more like Muhammad, requiring strict edicts and living sinless lives as a requirement to get to Heaven.

God gave my wife an elbow. And if that elbow hits my rib cage just right, I know I have been caught steeling a glance at another women just a little too long. But this has never happened because God gave me a built in early warning system called a conscience, so I can catch my self if I am going down that path. All in all it works out pretty darn good.

[stuartcr]

I don’t have one, that’s why I asked. Is it a sin to look at women lustfully, for Jewish people?

[bronxville]

“And instead of shaking hands at the offering of a sign of peace, most men gave the revolutionary sign: an extended fist.”

A lot of it’s ignorance. We say - “the peace of Christ be with you” - a lot of people think it’s peace from war or in this case for war aka revolution. One man who was visiting for a while used to hold up his hippie two finger peace sign.

[jboot]

I just can’t understand why looking at a woman lustfully is any kind of a sin or actual adultery.

Because Jesus Christ said so.

But if you don't believe that Jesus Christ was Who He said He was, then by all means, carry on. Why worry?

[stuartcr]

But why is it a sin and exactly how does it reduce someone to an object? Everything is God’s creation, even the fact that women can make men look at them with lust.

[stuartcr]

I’m not worried, I just am curious about people’s religious beliefs.

[Craftmore]

Im sorry,Where does it say that we shouldnt scandalize one of these little ones?I checked all my Bibles ,,nowhere does it say that.I think you have your quote wrong.And how does dressing in a certain way scandalize them,is that your problem or thiers?Is it truly about how they are dressed,,or in how you look at them?There are people who have fetishes about nuns habits,,is that the sin of the nun,or the sin of the viewer.
Did God tell His naked prophet he was sinning by preaching naked?No,it was God Himself that ordered him to preach naked in the first place.
For further thought,,were Adam and Eve created wearing proper attire?Dwell on that question before you answer.

[RichInOC]

Consider it an opportunity to praise God for the beauty of His creation...or at least for the skill He gave the cosmetic surgeons.

[Alas Babylon!]

Probably for the same reason we'd find this repulsive!

[steve86]

The Mass in based on reverence and respect. No one is stopping anyone from saying prayers naked in your bedroom. But I don’t; I even try to maintain a decent posture while praying.

Interestingly. casual and immodest dress is not much of a problem at our Latin Masses. Actually, no problem at all. Occasionally someone will show up obviously straight from work or another activity. But nothing immodest in the pews. Once, a lady with a low-cut blouse stayed in the vestibule through the Mass. That was the biggest “incident” we ever had.