His particular pastoral skills are needed in central Antarctica. I have seen some recommend a deserted tropical island for his next parish, but I don’t think we should take the chance shipwreck survivors might be washed up there.
Freegards
Hmmm. Might be fun if they could install live video feed and watch him give his insane rants in -20o F temptatures, but I would feel bad for the Catholic research scientists forced to listen to Pflakey's "God hates Antarctica" sermons and "the U.S. science station is racist" speeches.
We should make some calls to the Vatican and suggest locations for Pflakey's transfer. Some other possible places crying out for Pflakey's talent:
The largest uninhabited island on Earth, in the northern arctic
The ghost town where the Chernobyl meltdown occuried
The world's most active volcano
The infamously abandoned Hawaiian leper colony
;-)