HAVE YOU NOTICED THIS ABOUT MORMONS?

Various | April 17, 2011 | Vanity

[greyfoxx39]

HAVE YOU NOTICED THIS ABOUT MORMONS?

 

If you were to desire to enter the exclusive LDS-Mormon club, you would have to be agree to the church doctrine including this:

 

First Presidency Doctrinal Statements
It is not only his discourses that form the basis of Joseph F. Smith's doctrinal legacy. During his presidency, several important documents signed by the First Presidency and/or the Twelve were issued that still serve as a touch stone of Latter-day Saint belief. One such document, The Origin of Man: By the First Presidency, was issued in 1909 during a time when evolution was gaining attention in the academic world.

They wrote:

"In presenting the statement that follows we are not conscious of putting forth anything essentially new; neither is it our desire so to do. Truth is what we wish to present, and truth--eternal truth--is fundamentally old. A restatement of the original attitude of the Church relative to this matter is all that will be attempted here. To tell the truth as God has revealed it, and commend it to the acceptance of those who need to conform their opinions thereto, is the sole purpose of this presentation. 'God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.' In these plain and pointed words the inspired author of the book of Genesis made known to the world the truth concerning the origin of the human family."

They added:

"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, basing its belief on divine revelation, ancient and modern, proclaims man to be the direct and lineal offspring of Deity. God Himself is an exalted man, perfected, enthroned, and supreme. By His almighty power He organized the earth, and all that it contains, from spirit and element, which exist co-eternally with Himself. He formed every plant that grows, and every animal that breathes, each after its own kind, spiritually and temporally--'that which is spiritual being in the likeness of that which is temporal, and that which is temporal in the likeness of that which is spiritual.' He made the tadpole and the ape, the lion and the elephant but He did not make them in His own image, nor endow them with Godlike reason and intelligence. Nevertheless, the whole animal creation will be perfected and perpetuated in the Hereafter, each class in its 'distinct order or sphere,' and will enjoy 'eternal felicity.' . . . Man is the child of God, formed in the divine image and endowed with divine attributes, and even as the infant son of an earthly father and mother is capable in due time of becoming a man, so the undeveloped offspring of celestial parentage is capable, by experience through ages and aeons, of evolving into a God."

http://www.meridianmagazine.com/biography/000128jfsdoctrinelegacy.html 

AND THIS: The non-creedal creed of the LDS church

 

 

The Articles of Faith
of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

 

1. We believe in God, the Eternal Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.
   
2. We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam's transgression.
   
3. We believe that through the Atonement of Christ, all mankind may be saved, by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel.
   
4. We believe that the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance; third, Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost.
   
5. We believe that a man must be called of God, by prophecy, and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority, to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.
   
6. We believe in the same organization that existed in the Primitive Church, namely, apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists, and so forth.
   
7. We believe in the gift of tongues, prophecy, revelation, visions, healing, interpretation of tongues, and so forth.
   
8. We believe the Bible to be the word of God as far as it is translated correctly; we also believe the Book of Mormon to be the word of God.
   
9. We believe all that God has revealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.
   
10. We believe in the literal gathering of Israel and in the restoration of the Ten Tribes; that Zion (the New Jerusalem) will be built upon the American continent; that Christ will reign personally upon the earth; and, that the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal glory.
    
11. We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may.
    
12. We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law.
    
13. We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul—We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

Joseph Smith

http://lds.org/scriptures/pgp/a-of-f/1.1-13?lang=eng#1

You would be required to: Become baptized, because the mormon church does not recognize Christian baptism as do many Christian denominations;  then become confirmed a member ot the mormon church; then become worthy to be "ordained" into the two "priesthoods"; (IF you are male.)

May 15, 1829, while Joseph translated passages of the Book of Mormon about the necessity of baptism, he and Oliver Cowdery had asked the Lord who had to baptize in His name. "The voice of the Redeemer spake peace to us," Oliver later wrote, and a heavenly messenger, John the Baptist, "came down clothed with glory." He conferred upon the two men the , which holds the "of the gospel of repentance, and of for the remission of sins."

John the Baptist directed the two men to baptize each other, and they soon also baptized others converted to the restored gospel. Through priesthood ordination they authorized others to perform baptism by immersion. From that small beginning, many millions of people worldwide have been baptized members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

Weeks later, Peter, James, and John, who possess "the keys of the kingdom, and of the dispensation of the fulness of times," appeared to Joseph and Oliver and conferred upon them the . Now the fulness of the gospel could be restored, the Church of Jesus Christ could be organized to "roll forth," and all the necessary for the salvation of God's children could be performed—including bestowing the gift of the Holy Ghost.

Because were restored to Joseph Smith, all of God's children can receive the ordinances of salvation such as baptism administered by those called of God to act and speak in His name.   D&C 13:1.2. D&C 128:20.3. D&C 65:2. 

priesthood keys

Keys are the rights of presidency, or the power given to man by God to direct, control, and govern God's priesthood on earth. Priesthood holders called to positions of presidency receive keys from those in authority over them. Priesthood holders use the priesthood only within the limits outlined by those who hold the keys. The President of the Church holds all priesthood keys (see D&C 107:65–67, 91–92; 132:7; The Guide to the Scriptures, "Keys of the Priesthood," 141).  Note: Women are not eligible to become "Priesthood Holders".

Then, if you become "worthy" according to mormon requirements, which include among other things, obeying the Word of Wisdom;

Doctrine and Covenants Section 89 

Revelation given through Joseph Smith the Prophet, at Kirtland, Ohio, 27 February 1833 (see History of the Church, 1:327–29). As a consequence of the early brethren using tobacco in their meetings, the Prophet was led to ponder upon the matter; consequently, he inquired of the Lord concerning it. This revelation, known as the Word of Wisdom, was the result. The first three verses were originally written as an inspired introduction and description by the Prophet.

1–9, The use of wine, strong drinks, tobacco, and hot drinks is proscribed; 10–17, Herbs, fruits, flesh, and grain are ordained for the use of man and of animals; 18–21, Obedience to gospel law, including the Word of Wisdom, brings temporal and spiritual blessings.

You may then appear before your "spiritual leader" or Ward Bishop, to answer these questions:

Temple Recommend Questions:

 1 Do you have faith in and a testimony of God the Eternal Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost?

 2 Do you have a testimony of the Atonement of Christ and of His role as Savior and Redeemer?

 3 Do you have a testimony of the restoration of the gospel in these the latter days?

 4 Do you sustain the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as the Prophet, Seer, and Revelator and as the only person on the earth who possesses and is authorized to exercise all priesthood keys? Do you sustain members of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles as prophets, seers, and revelators? Do you sustain the other General Authorities and local authorities of the Church?

 5 Do you live the law of chastity?

 6 Is there anything in your conduct relating to members of your family that is not in harmony with the teachings of the Church?

 7 Do you support, affiliate with, or agree with any group or individual whose teachings or practices are contrary to or oppose those accepted by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?

 8 Do you strive to keep the covenants you have made, to attend your sacrament and other meetings, and to keep your life in harmony with the laws and commandments of the gospel?

 9 Are you honest in your dealings with your fellowmen?

10 Are you a full-tithe payer?

11 Do your keep the Word of Wisdom?

12 Do you have financial or other oblgations to a former spouse or children? If yes, are you current in meeting those obligations?

13 If you have previously received your temple endowment:

     Do you keep the covenants that you made in the temple?

     Do you wear the garment both night and day as instructed in the endowment and in accordance with the covenant you made in the temple?

14 Have there been any sins or misdeeds in your life that should have been resolved with priesthood authorities but have not been?

15 Do you consider yourself worthy to enter the Lord's house and participate in temple ordinances?

 

If you pass the Recommend test, you will be issued a piece of paper with a bar code on it that will allow you to enter the temple,  No one may enter except those with "recommends"  You will then take part in arcane rituals and are described as "Covenants"...covenants that are said to bind YOU and also to bind GOD.  In this "temple session",  you will be required to take this oath:

You and each of you covenant and promise before God, angels, and these witnesses at this altar, that you do accept the Law of Consecration as contained in the Doctrine and Covenants, in that you do consecrate yourselves, your time, talents, and everything with which the Lord has blessed you, or with which he may bless you, to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, for the building up of the Kingdom of God on the earth and for the establishment of Zion .

NOTE:  This vow has been taken by Mitt Romney, Jon Huntsman, Harry Reid, Orrin Hatch and ALL others who have a position in the US Federal Government who are "worthy" members of the mormon church including FBI, CIA, Secret Service, etc. and by "worthy" members of the mormon church in your city, state, on your school board...wherever a position of authority is available.

After you take part in the temple rites, you are required to wear a specific underwear garment for the rest of your life.

Those baptized members including girls and women, who are too young to take part in the temple rituals will be required to take part in "proxy" Baptism for the Dead after they also acquire their own "temple recommend".

There are several religions larger than most Christian denominations, and together they are larger than all of them combined. Their adherents for centuries have lived and died and never heard the word baptism. What is the answer for them?

That is a most disturbing question. What power would establish one Lord and one baptism, and then allow it to be that most of the human family never comes within its influence? With that question unanswered, the vast majority of the human family must be admitted to be lost, and against any reasonable application of the law of justice or of mercy, either. How could Christianity itself be sustained?

When you find the true church you will find the answer to that disturbing question.

If a church has no answer for that, how can it lay claim to be His Church? He is not willing to write off the majority of the human family who were never baptized.

Those who admit in puzzled frustration that they have no answer to this cannot lay claim to authority to administer to the affairs of the Lord on the earth, or to oversee the work by which all mankind must be saved.

Since they had no answer concerning the fate of those who had not been baptized, Christians came to believe that baptism itself was not critical in importance, and that the name of Christ may not be all that essential. There must, they supposed, be other names whereby man could be saved.

The answer to that puzzling challenge could not be invented by men, but was revealed. I underline the word revealed. Revelation too is an essential characteristic of His Church. Communication with Him through revelation was established when the Church was established. It has not ceased and it is constant in the Church today.

As I address myself to the question of those who died without baptism, I do so with the deepest reverence, for it touches on a sacred work. Little known to the world, we move obediently forward in a work that is so marvelous in its prospects, transcendent above what man might have dreamed of, supernal, inspired, and true. In it lies the answer.

In the earliest days of the Church the Prophet was given direction through revelation that work should commence on the building of a temple, akin to the temples that had been constructed anciently. There was revealed ordinance work to be performed there for the salvation of mankind.

Then another ancient scripture, ignored or overlooked by the Christian world in general, was understood and moved into significant prominence: “Else what shall they do which are baptized for the dead, if the dead rise not at all? why are they then baptized for the dead?” (1 Cor. 15:29.)

Here then, was the answer. With proper authority an individual could be baptized for and in behalf of someone who had never had the opportunity. That individual would then accept or reject the baptism, according to his own desire.

This work came as a great reaffirmation of something very basic that the Christian world now only partly believes: and that is that there is life after death. Mortal death is no more an ending than birth was a beginning. The great work of redemption goes on beyond the veil as well as here in mortality."

“The Redemption of the Dead,” Ensign, Nov. 1975, 97

Now,  this is just a part of what is required to call yourself "Mormon".  Even sects that adhere more closely to the teachings of Joseph Smith, such as the FLDS have been excommunicated for practicing polygamy which is STILL part of mormon "scripture"

Revelation given through Joseph Smith the Prophet, at Nauvoo, Illinois, recorded July 12, 1843, relating to the new and everlasting covenant, including the eternity of the marriage covenant, as also plurality of wives. HC 5: 501–507. Although the revelation was recorded in 1843, it is evident from the historical records that the doctrines and principles involved in this revelation had been known by the Prophet since 1831.

, Exaltation is gained through the new and everlasting covenant; , The terms and conditions of that covenant are set forth; , Celestial marriage and a continuation of the family unit enable men to become gods; , The strait and narrow way that leads to eternal lives; , Law given relative to blasphemy against the Holy Ghost; , Promises of eternal increase and exaltation made to prophets and saints in all ages; , Joseph Smith is given the power to bind and seal on earth and in heaven; , The Lord seals upon him his exaltation; , Emma Smith is counseled to be faithful and true; , Laws governing the plurality of wives are set forth.

  1 Verily, thus saith the Lord unto you my servant Joseph, that inasmuch as you have inquired of my hand to know and understand wherein I, the Lord, justified my servants Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, as also Moses, David and Solomon, my servants, as touching the principle and doctrine of their having many ^a and ^b—

  2 Behold, and lo, I am the Lord thy God, and will answer thee as touching this matter.

  3 Therefore, ^a thy heart to receive and ^b the instructions which I am about to give unto you; for all those who have this law revealed unto them must obey the same.

  4 For behold, I reveal unto you a new and an everlasting ^a; and if ye abide not that covenant, then are ye ^b; for no one can ^c this covenant and be permitted to enter into my glory.

Now, to those of you who are reading this I have ONE question:

If ANY OF US cannot be called "mormon" unless WE adhere to all the requirements (and more) listed above.......WHY IS IT THAT MORMONS BELIEVE THAT ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS INSIST THAT THEY BE CALLED "CHRISTIAN" AND THE CHRISTIAN WORLD IS REQUIRED TO BOW TO ITS DEMAND?

[Godzilla]

Hating religions - hmmmm, that is a new twist on a common theme. Please, tell me exactly HOW this hating is manifest? I’ve seen mormon doctrine presented from MORMON sources, common items that anyone that has half a google capability can find and show to be true.

This doctrine is then compared to basic Christian doctrine - wow.

How much time have you spent reading the Bible fist? You will see that the discussions here don’t even rise to the level of hate.

Or do you hate Christianity in general? Again, were you to read you Bible, particularly the NT, you would see that the beliefs of Jews and pagans were continually challenge - but you would call it ‘hate’ - by the application you’ve shown here.

BTW, still waiting if you consider what the mormon missionaries do as hate?

So, prove the hate - you know - pony up. Or is this another case of all hat and no cows?

[Godzilla]

Of course, little or no religious upbringing on their own, an excessively liberal background or affiliated with another minor cult or sect.

[greyfoxx39]

Still only one answer to the main question.....

Now, to those of you who are reading this I have ONE question:

If ANY OF US cannot be called "mormon" unless WE adhere to all the requirements (and more) listed above.......WHY IS IT THAT MORMONS BELIEVE THAT ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS INSIST THAT THEY BE CALLED "CHRISTIAN" AND THE CHRISTIAN WORLD IS REQUIRED TO BOW TO ITS DEMAND?

Lots of wailing and gnashing of teeth because I have the effrontery to even ask, but only one answer...

[ScreamingFist]

I’ve seen mormon doctrine presented from MORMON sources, common items that anyone that has half a google capability can find and show to be true.

Oh please. I have Mormons, holy rollers and snake handlers living just down the road. We're neighbors. They are my friends. Unless you are the second coming of Christ, I would suggest you go study more scripture.

[Pharmboy]

Well, I guess it's a pretty good goal; I did not know that.

I was told in a post above that this is a religious forum and I should butt out. Sorry for the intrusion. Truly.

[svcw]

mormonISM is not Christianity any more than sitting on the kitchen counter makes me a toaster.

[Colofornian]

If ANY OF US cannot be called "mormon" unless WE adhere to all the requirements (and more) listed above.......WHY IS IT THAT MORMONS BELIEVE THAT ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS INSIST THAT THEY BE CALLED "CHRISTIAN" AND THE CHRISTIAN WORLD IS REQUIRED TO BOW TO ITS DEMAND?

Excellent Q...and one that the thread disruptors succeeded in temporarily sidelining it.

Let's answer the part of the Q about what it means to be a "Mormon" first -- from a contemporary Mormon worldview:

Mormon religiosity DEMANDS ritualistic hoop-jumping:
* Ya gotta be a member of the Mormon church, supposedly the ONLY TRUE church on the face of the earth (preaches Mormons) -- D&C 1:30 [that cuts things down to about .17% of the earth's population]
* Ya gotta have a Mormon "union" card -- what they call a "temple recommend" card...Can't live with God the Father forever without it.[that cuts things down to approximately .03 or .04% of the earth's population]
* Ya gotta be married (or widowed). No singles allowed to live with the Mormon god forever -- per Mormon doctrine. [that cuts things down to about .01% or a wee bit o'er that of the earth's population]

And then how many temple-recommended Lds go haywire -- or come to their senses -- in some way & become ex-Mormons, Jack Mormons, criminals, etc.?? [that knocks it down to less than .01% of the earth's population that might pass Mormon man-made hoops for living with the Mormon god forever...& that doesn't count any divine zots acomin' that weren't solved by a church membership, temple rec card, or marriage license!]

The bottom-line point in ALL of this: Mormons make it VERY CLEAR that to be a TRUE-BELIEVING Mormon eligible to live with God forever is an exclusive club membership Only!

Don't mess with country-club religiosity Greyfoxx! (That former "White boys only" club doesn't like meddlin'...and they've sent the anti-meddlin' preachers your way)

[greyfoxx39]

Don't mess with country-club religiosity Greyfoxx! (That former "White boys only" club doesn't like meddlin'...and they've sent the anti-meddlin' preachers your way)

Oh, dear! Do you think I might see my name on some list somewhere, sayin' I'm one of those dreaded "antis"?

Can you imagine the gall of "about .01% or a wee bit o'er that of the earth's population" trying to dictate to ALL the Christians in the world?

[ScreamingFist]

Don't mess with country-club religiosity Greyfoxx! (That former "White boys only" club doesn't like meddlin'...and they've sent the anti-meddlin' preachers your way)

Let me say this plainly. In my small town of 900 people, we have 9 churches. We get blown out, burned out. froze out and droughted out. You typists on the internet have no idea. "He's a Mormon", "Jew" or "Christian" makes no difference when your house was just flattened.....

[County Agent Hank Kimball]

YOU can’t join my ping list!

Hank

[Colofornian]

Can you imagine the gall of "about .01% or a wee bit o'er that of the earth's population" trying to dictate to ALL the Christians in the world?

Well, it's worst than that!

While, yes, you have .01% of the world or so that has no Christian roots claiming, "We're Christian, too"...The "we're Christian, too" is a recent marketing branding endeavor.

The real branding marketer at-large in the world -- the one from the Mormon get-go -- the one that the historic worldwide Christian church didn't "hire" as its marketer...was Joseph Smith.

In contradiction to the "we're Christians, too" marketing line...Smith's marketing line proclaimed to the world about the historic Christian church was: "You're Christians...NOT"

He marketed them (us Christians) as being 100% AWOL. 100% "apostate." 100% Gone. 100% buried.

So there ya have it. ONE PERSON in history who lived to be less than 40 years of age...who, when he was about pimply-faced 14, determined that the entire Christian world for 1500-1800 years had not been truly of Christ at all...including the founders of this country...and then he proceeded to define all 19th century, 20th century, 21st century Christians, etc. in the same manner.

One person. Defining the entire world of Christianity for 1700-1900 years or so as identityless in Christ.

And here we have all these non-Mormon Mormon defenders preaching "tolerance." (Where's the Mormon tolerance about us allowing to define ourselves as "Christian" without all the Mormons engaging in print name-calling that we're "apostates"?...that we're "corrupt"?...that we're the "church of the devil" or the "whore of Babylon?")

If ye hypocrites are going to preach your gospel of "tolerance," then we'd like to see you remove one of your faces and preach it to the Mormon church!

[Tennessee Nana]

I ran over a snake on my driveway this morning as I was leaving for Palm Sunday services...

I wonder if he wants to come in and post something to that FReeper ???

Maybe he wants to tell us of he is a “holy roller” or a “dead dunker”

Closer to the dead I would think...

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

That would make him a mormon...

[Tennessee Nana]

From my experience, Mormons leave you alone if you tell them you’re not interested in their church.
_________________________________________________

WOW

how much did you have to pay them to stay away ???

[ScreamingFist]

YOU can’t join my ping list!

Darn, since 1999 my true wish was to join your "ping list".

[County Agent Hank Kimball]

It was a joke...check my sig.

Hank

[Colofornian]

Let me say this plainly. In my small town of 900 people, we have 9 churches. We get blown out, burned out. froze out and droughted out. You typists on the internet have no idea. "He's a Mormon", "Jew" or "Christian" makes no difference when your house was just flattened.....

Let me say this plainly.

The apostle Paul, in the first part of his letter to the church at Galatia, said, "Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to ALL people..." (Gal. 6:10a)

If people haven't noted what the various TRUE Christian church people & the churches they represented did on behalf of those who suffered Katrina, for example, then they were asleep at the wheel.

So in that horizontal sense -- Christian people who headed to the Biloxi area and the New Orleans area didn't ask what religion they were in order to aid them....meaning charity is an identity-free "enterprise."

So up to a point, you have a point.

But I only quoted you Gal. 6:10a -- I deliberately didn't finish the rest (6:10b). So let me cite it again in its entirety: "Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to ALL PEOPLE, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." (Gal. 6:10)

The apostle Paul, who wrote most of the New Testament, still advocated that Christians -- in addition to prioritizing reaching non-Christians with the Gospel & helping them out in many other ways -- are to prioritize helping fellow Christians.

I'm not ashamed of that. We are family, after all...and who apologizes for putting "family" before others in helping them out?

Anyway, I've covered a few horizontal realities. But I've still left off the vertical ones -- the dimension you didn't address.

Eternal life with God is a relationship that starts NOW...on this earth. Jesus said: "And this is eternal life, that you KNOW the ONLY True God, and Jesus Christ whom He has sent." (John 17:3)

Jesus said this as He prayed. What "good teacher" would pretend to pray to His Father -- and lie about content?

Jesus didn't say knowin ANY ole god would do...No...knowing the ONLY True God. John talked about the heavenly city in his revelation. While it's true a person's denomination may become meaningless before God, that doesn't mean that all faith-based identifiers were meaningless:

26 The glory and honor of the nations will be brought into it. 27 Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life. (Revelation 21:26-27)

15 Anyone whose name was not found written in the book of life was thrown into the lake of fire. (Revelation 20:15) (v. 12 covers the judgment of those rejected from the Book of Life)

My point here: Don't mistake Christian charity and solidarity during catastrophes...
...with God never putting out a deadline on His offer of grace as revealed on the cross.

Jesus made it clear that "wide is the road leading to destruction" and "narrow is the way to life." There won't be post-death "solidarity." Hell is real.

And God already extended Himself to the extreme -- on the cross. We cannot do end runs around it. We either embrace it, or reject it.

Mormons have rejected the cross as a pagan symbol. And they say living with God forever is dependent not on the charity revealed from the cross, received, and transformed -- but upon you and your good works.

[Religion Moderator]

Click on my profile page for guidelines pertaining to the Religion Forum.

If you do not wish to see RF posts, do NOT use the "everything" option on the browse. Instead, browse by "News/Activism." When you log back in, the browse will reset to "everything" - so be sure to set it back to "News/Activism."

Several of your posts were removed for language. Potty language and references to potty language are not tolerable on the RF.

[Colofornian]

That would make him a mormon...

(Well, sure. I'll just look into his snake genealogy...find out his egg-burst day...and hey, we know his death day: April 17, 2011...then, since Screamingfist must have met a lot of snake handlers if he assumes all Christians are so dialed in as such, we'll have Screamingfist send us a live teen-age snake who could come into a newly constructed snake temple...and we'll proxy dead dunk the live snake on behalf of the dead snake...so that he, too, can become an eternal Mormon hisser).

[ScreamingFist]

No problem. I’ll make sure I don’t help you. Easy. You can save my soul, from a ditch. Good luck.

[Ripliancum]

I thought Lent was that time of year when the FReepers traditionally gave up Mormon bashing in favor of Catholic bashing.
____________________________________________________________________________

Snort! In not sure that will be appreciated too much by most here, but I liked it.