AMERICAN humor.

La douche is merely the WASH.

We Americans use it VERY (ahem) specifically to wash ONE thing... (Half of us do; anyway)

(that is what I imagine heaven would look like)

Then you are probably wrong! ;^)

1 Corinthians 2:9
"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him"

I heard a funny sound when my car rolled over a mouse!

Not to mention the whole Haiti fiasco.

There you go again - bashing us MORMONS!

^{We DID send them 600 temporary housing kits!!}⁾

BITE ME!

but not in anger...

Please do not bastardize the Word of God.

2 Nephi 3:12 Wherefore, the fruit of thy loins write; and the fruit of thy loins of Judah shall write; and that which shall be written by the fruit of thy loins, and also that which shall be written by the fruit of thy loins of Judah, shall grow together,

2 Nephi 3:18 And the Lord said unto me also: I will raise up unto the fruit of thy loins; and I will make for him a spokesman. And I, behold, I will give unto him that he shall write the writing of the fruit of thy loins, unto the fruit of thy loins; and the spokesman of thy loins shall declare it.

Joseph Smith Translation Gen. 50: 27 Thus saith the Lord God of my fathers unto me, A choice seer will I raise up out of the fruit of thy loins, and he shall be esteemed highly among the fruit of thy loins; and unto him will I give commandment that he shall do a work for the fruit of thy loins, his brethren.

Joseph Smith Translation Gen. 50: 31 Wherefore the fruit of thy loins shall write, and the fruit of thy loins of Judah shall write; and that which shall be written by the fruit of thy loins, and also that which shall be written by the fruit of thy loins of Judah, shall grow together

Diaboli virtus in lumbas est. Diaboli virtus in lumbas est.

Luke 18:9-14

9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable:
10 "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee stood up and prayed about [fn] himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men-robbers, evildoers, adulterers-or even like this tax collector.
12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'
13 "But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'
14 "I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Apparently re-writing the Word of God is common practice for lds, it has been going on for awhile now.

And THEN they will IGNORE the parts they don't like!

Thanks and blessings to you.

Um...

No...

Someday I am going to write a vanity on why "CTR" ticks me off so much.

You need a ring like THIS one!!

I was blessed(?) to spot THIS plate in a Wally-World lot in Tooele, UT.

(Taken on 9/11/2009)

And, for you GOAT lovers; if you zoom in to 1062 West Vine Street in Tooele, (Google Earth) you can see some Goats! See 'em BETTER in Street Veiw!!

Easy!

WE check for BONES!!!

—MormonDude(Wait! It has no HANDS!)

true...

I will be following up with you Mr. Highground!

When you get done salivating over ANTI behavior; perhaps you'd take time to actually look at SCRIPTURE that shows MORMONism's failings...

(I think elsie has a list of that)

TADA!

Mormon words don't mean the same thing.

Anyone who tries to witness to a Mormon will soon find that the words they use do not always mean the same thing to Christians.

Below is a list of terms that are important for Christians to know when discussing the truth with Mormons.

It is important that you know what the Mormons mean by the same words used by Christians.

ADAM	LDS - Father of physical mankind. Adam is also known as Michael the archangel, the ancient of days, (D&C 116).	Bible - the first created man by whom all of humanity descends. He was not Michael the archangel.
ATONEMENT	LDS - The sacrifice of Christ that made resurrection possible along with the possibility of our earning forgiveness of sins.	Bible - The substitutionary sacrifice of Jesus on our behalf. He died for our sins (1 Peter 2:24; 1 John 2:2).
AARONIC PRIESTHOOD	LDS - A lesser priesthood in the LDS church. It is still used in LDS church practices and is held by the very young, (D&C 107:1, 6, 10).	Bible - A priesthood that is no longer necessary now that we have the full revelation of Christ.
BAPTISM	LDS - A necessary ordinance for salvation in the Mormon church. By it sins are washed away.	Bible - An ordinance of the Christian church that is not necessary for salvation (Rom. 5:1).
BIBLE	LDS - The Bible is correct only as far as it is correctly translated. It is basically trustworthy. It is the only one of the four standard works (Bible, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, and Pearl of Great Price) that is not considered infallible. The KJV is the official Bible of the LDS church.	Bible - the Bible is the inspired inerrant word of God (2 Tim. 3:16).
BISHOP	LDS - an office in the Melchizedek Priesthood of the LDS church. D&C 20:67),	Bible - An office held by a male member of the Church.
CELESTIAL HEAVEN	LDS - The highest of the three levels of heaven where faithful Mormons are exalted to Godhood.	Bible - There is no such thing as a celestial heaven.
CHURCH	LDS - The LDS church with its organizational structure, laws, and proper name.	Bible - The body of believers in the true and living God through Jesus. It is comprised of those who are redeemed and is not limited to an earthly structure.
DAMNATION	LDS - Basically, anything lesser than exaltation (becoming a God).	Bible - The state of condemnation, judged by God in eternal hell (Matt. 25:46).
DEVIL	LDS - See Satan.	Bible - See Satan.
ELOHIM	LDS - The name of God the Father.	Bible - The Hebrew word for "God." The name of God is "YHWH," which means "I AM," (Exodus 3:14).
ETERNAL LIFE	LDS - Exaltation (exaltation to a Mormon means obtaining Godhood) in the Celestial Kingdom.	Bible - Forgiveness of sins and life eternal with God (John 17:3; Rom. 6:23).
EXALTATION	LDS - The state of becoming a god in the celestial heaven.	Bible - There is no such thing as becoming a God in the Bible.
FALL OF MANKIND	LDS - A blessing (Mosiah 3: 11-16). A necessary step in the progression of humanity to the level of Godhood.	Bible - The open rebellion of Adam and Eve against God resulting in their condemnation and the fall of mankind.
GOD	LDS - One of countless gods in existence. An exalted man from another world who created the earth who's name is "Elohim." He became a god by following the laws and ordinances of his god on the other world. He has a body of flesh and bones. D&C 130: 22-23.	Bible - The one and only God in all the universe, (Isaiah 44:6,8).
GODHEAD	LDS - An office held by three separate Gods: the Father who is a god; Jesus who is a god; and the Holy Ghost who is a god.	Bible - God Himself, not an office. Three persons in one God. A Trinity: The Father; the Son; and the Holy Spirit.
GOSPEL	LDS - The laws and ordinances of the Mormon church.	Bible - The death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus for the forgiveness of the sins of all who would trust in Him (1 Cor. 15:1-4).
HEAVEN	LDS - Divided into three Kingdoms: Celestial, Terrestrial, and Telestial. The Celestial is for perfect Mormons, the Terrestrial is for moral people and lukewarm LDS, and the Telestial Kingdom is for everyone else.	Bible - The dwelling place of God (1 Kings 8:30). Christians go to heaven.
HELL	LDS - The temporary abode in the spirit world between death and resurrection for those awaiting telestial glory, (D&C 76: 84-85, 106). Hell will come to an end.	Bible - the eternal dwelling place of those who rejected the atoning work of Christ.
HOLY GHOST	LDS - "A spirit man. He can only be at one place at one time... " (Mormon Doctrine by Bruce McConkie, p. 359.) The Holy Ghost is contrasted with the Spirit of God, which is the influence of the Godhead that fills the immensity of space which enables God to know what is going on. It is likened to electricity." D&C 130: 22-23.	Bible - Third person of the Trinity. Same as Holy Spirit (Acts 5:3-4).
HOLY SPIRIT	LDS - The presence of God as distinguished from the Holy Ghost who is a god in the mormon trinity.	Bible - An equivalent term to Holy Ghost, third person in the Trinity.
JEHOVAH	LDS - The name of Jesus in the Old Testament.	Bible - The name of God is "YHWH," which means "I AM," (Exodus 3:14).
JESUS	LDS - Literal offspring of God the father. Spirit brother of Satan. A god in the Godhead. He is Jehovah of the O.T. compared to Elohim being the Father. He was the first spirit child to be born to the Father and Mother gods. Ordained as the Christ in the pre-existent Grand Council before coming to earth.	Bible - Jesus is God, second person of the Trinity (John 1:1,14; Col. 2:9).
KINGDOM OF GOD	LDS - Celestial heaven. The kingdom of God on earth is the LDS church.	Bible - All the believers of Christ (Matt. 13:41-43).
MARRIAGE	LDS - An eternal bonding of husband and wife that continues into the afterlife. These couples will continue to have children. (D&C 132:15-20).	Bible - the holy covenant between a man and a woman that is broken at death.
MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD	LDS - A greater priesthood in the LDS church held by elders, (D&C 107),	Bible - A priesthood held by Jesus alone.
PRE-EXISTENCE	LDS - We existed in heaven with God our (literal) Father and mother before we became human.	Bible - We did not exist before we came to earth (1 Cor. 15:46).
SALVATION	LDS - Two fold meaning: Simple bodily resurrection of all people. Also, forgiveness of sins.	Bible - Forgiveness of sins with the result of a present new life and in the future eternal life with God (1 Cor. 15:1-4; Rom. 6:23; 10:9-10).
SATAN	LDS - The opposer of God, literal son of God, brother of Jesus and all people begotten in the pre-existent spirit world.	Bible - A fallen angel who rebelled against God.
SCRIPTURE	LDS - Bible, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, Pearl of Great Price.	Bible - Only the Bible is scripture.
TEMPLE	LDS - A present day temple used to practice the ordinances and ceremonies of the gospel of the LDS church on behalf of the living as well as the dead.	Bible - The Old Testament building where God dwelt, sacrifices were offered, and holy priestly rites were administered. There is no longer a need for temples.
TRINITY	LDS- Three gods: a god called the Father; a god called the son; a god called the Holy Ghost.	Bible - The one and only God in all existence who is comprised of three persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. See Trinity.

Go to http://scriptures.lds.org/bd/contents for a list of Mormon words and definitions

produced by the LDS church.

I used to live near Palmyra if all these bodies and all their weapons were left strewn about then where are they?

Wolves, coyotes and vultures; oh MY!

Just like MMM.

And don’t give me the ‘it wasn’t finished’ excuse because Smith himself said he completed it.

The correct name is the Joseph Smith Translation of the King James Version of the Bible.

Joseph Smith was (if one believes the story) commanded by GOD Himself to correct and edit the KJV. (You can read snippits of GOD's instructions to JS in the headings of many D&C's)

After it was finally finished, JS' death occured and the bulk of MORMONs fled West with Brigham Young.

The manuscript of the JST stayed behind with JS' legal widow, Emma. She and others had remained behind in Missouri, SOMEhow miraculously avoiding DEATH!! at the hands of a MURDEROUS mob and then afterwards peacefully formed the Rlds church.

IT owns the copyright to the JST and (curiously) the SLC group does NOT include it in their 'Standard Works' of scripture. [which is odd since their Articles of Faith (creedal statement) proclaims that they believe the KJV bible as long as it is translated correctly. I'd think that since GOD Himself gave JS the mission to do exactly that - the Western bunch of MORMONs would call it SCRIPTURE.But, alas, they don't.

I am always polite, but i know exactly what quetions to ask.

Good for you!!

Professor Robert Millet teaching at the Mission Prep Club in 2004 http://newsnet.byu.edu/video/18773/ <-- Complete and uneditted

Timeline... Subject...

0:59 "Anti-Mormons..."

1:16 "ATTACK the faith you have..."

2:02 "We really aren't obligated to answer everyone's questions..."

3:57 "You already know MORE about God and Christ and the plan of salvation than any who would ATTACK you."

Well, I am going to award you with the Wednesday morning cupie doll. You get the prize.

So thanks for playing.

My heart lives in freedom not legalism (sin and death)

I know no one who is prejudice against mormons but instead trying to provide information to free people from mormonISM. Sorry you choose to ignore that fact.