Man covers up replica of nude 'David'

Associated Press ^ | 08/18/03 | Staff Writer

[bedolido]

EVANSVILLE, Ind. - A man who put a replica of Michelangelo's nude "David" sculpture in his yard responded to neighbors' objections by engaging in a cover-up.

Christopher Schapker last week used a strategically placed sheet to counteract concerns about the male nude in the side yard of his home.

Parents of students who attend a neighboring center that provides services for disabled people had expressed concern over the statue's nudity.

Schapker and his housemate, Kerry Niehaus, spent $2,000 for the sculpture to enhance the early 20th century style of their home.

At first, none of the children at the center noticed the statue. Once it was pointed out, it became the source of much discussion, said Rosemary Durbin, whose young daughter spends her days at the Evansville ARC Center.

Police Chief Dave Gulledge said he had not received any formal complaints about the statue.

"My preliminary thought is that it does not violate any statute," Vanderburgh County Prosecutor Stan Levco said. "But I haven't made a final determination."

The David statue is not the only potentially objectionable decoration in Schapker's yard.

"I've had a topless mermaid in my pond for two years that no one has said one thing about," he said.

[Hodar]

Instead of a sheet ... just attach a condom. Then, the 'Piece' would be covered in a very PC manner.

[bedolido]

I'm surprised the local High Schoolers haven't made off with certain body parts.

[Consort]

The statue may have to be yanked.

[Hodar]

Or the owner could simply attach a bottle-opener to the offending 'piece' and thus the statue is now a functional appliance for opening beer bottles.

[TomGuy]

At first, none of the children at the center noticed the statue.

At first, none of the children at the center noticed the statue [until some busybody with too much time on his/her hands and nothing better to do decided to cause trouble].

[bedolido]

Or the owner could simply attach a bottle-opener to the offending 'piece' and thus the statue is now a functional appliance for opening beer bottles.

LMAO... Actually snorted out coffee (Hot Coffee too). Still coughing.

[2oakes]

"My preliminary thought is that it does not violate any statute,"

but covering up does violate the statue...

[muir_redwoods]

He's lucky the authorities haven't recognized that David is biblical and may violate somebody's "separation-of-church-and-state" sensibilities.

Why, this statue is almost as reprehensible as mounting a stone copy of the ten commandments.

[Capriole]

Goodness gracious sakes alive, imagine the harm that might come to the fragile minds of people who might see a stone penis!

What a bunch of savages. Even the Victorians weren't that bad.

[thackney]

Who would want to drink from a long-neck opened this way?

wait, please don't answer that

[bedolido]

Goodness gracious sakes alive, imagine the harm that might come to the fragile minds of people who might see a stone penis!

And this was before Viagra. Wonder if he used Viagranite?

[tiamat]

Ya know?

If it was mine.... and I had people complaining....

I think I would buy boxer shorts, ( preferably in a loud print) and spend a little time with a seam ripper and some velcro. ( so as to be able to get the shorts on the statue like a pair of very guady "Depends")

And there David would be, all of his naughty bits tastefully covered!

Just think! You could get him "seasonal" or "holiday" shorts! Little pumpkins for Halloween, hearts for Valentine's Day!

It makes a political statement of the absurdity of the PC protesting, and its fun and colorful!

Tia

[moyden2000]

Two male "housemates" with a large nude male statue.

Hmmmmm.

[Scenic Sounds]

This is plenty of David for real Americans:

[Corin Stormhands]

Two male "housemates"...

You know that for sure? "Kerry" can be a feminine name. You're probably right with the use of the term "housemate." But I didn't see that for sure in the article.

[BlackbirdSST]

Should write John Ashcroft for advice! Blackbird.

[eastsider]

He's lucky the authorities haven't recognized that David is biblical and may violate somebody's "separation-of-church-and-state" sensibilities.

If David is biblical, then why isn't he circumcised?

[gcruse]

And there David would be, all of his naughty bits tastefully covered!

There is a museum of sorts at the base of Pike's Peak in Manitou Springs, Colorado.  They have a large wooden crucifix on display wearing a big white diaper.  I left a comment about it in their guest book, probably necessitating their expunging that particular page.  :)

[jsbankston]

Please tell me this is from an episode of The Simpson's and not real-life America.