Posted on 08/13/2003 10:35:48 AM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs
Today was a very special day.
I had the supreme opportunity to meet Hillary Rottenbottom at Miejer's Thrifty Acres, in Auburn Hills, Michigan.
I arrived around 10:30 am, for her 11:00 am book signing. The parking lot was packed.
I went into the store and was confronted by a sea of overweight housewives in white T shirts and shorts. You would have thought that this was an e-ticket ride for DisneyWorld. Fanny packs abound.
The line wound around the perimeter of the store. Hundreds upon hundreds of clones. All so very excited. They were there to meet their Queen.
I knew I had a long wait, and I was thinking of ditching the scene, because I was in heels, and I didn't feel like standing there for 2 hours just to meet her hieniousness.
Suddenly a dear friend of mine who is the camerman for a news station saw me in line, and asked what in the world I was doing there. I told him that I was up to shenanigans, and he told me to come with him, and pulled me out of line. He took me up near the front and placed me in line. I was about 25 people back from the Throne Of Hillary.
As I was waiting, I just stood and listened to the lobotomized clones around me. They could barely contain their glee. " Hillary is so wonderful. She will be our greatest president"." She is the best wife and mother"........
And don't even get me started about the wimpy men that were in line. It was mostly women, but there were a couple of husbands, probably because their wives were too overwrought with emotion to drive themselves to the Thrifty Acres.
Suddenly, with a smidgen of fanfare, from the bowells of hell, appears Hillary!. I called an audible. I said " Oh lord, she has a soccer ball in there". Oops, I didn't know I said that out loud. Silly me.
Yes indeed folks, Hillary, looking ever so hideous in a fuschia jacket, black trousers, and black sensible shoes, actually looks like she has a soccerball in her belly. Maybe it's a tumor, heck if I know, but there is something there. Hey, maybe it's a fannypack!
Today was obviously not a 'bath day' for the old gal. Her hair was undone, no makeup, no lipstick, but she did have earrings.
As we got closer, women around me started crying. Yes, you read that right, they were CRYING! They couldn't wait to meet Hillary. I honestly thought that some of them would pass out and die on the spot. It was from either too much excitement, or the copious amount of doughnuts that they had consumed over their lifetime.
There was an elderly lady in front of me that asked me for support. She felt faint from all the excitement.
..............as a small aside, Hillary is fuzzy. Remember those soaps you had as a kid, you got them wet and in a few days they grew fuz? Hillary has a very fuzzy face. And it's very round. Pumpkin round. Fuzzy and round and falling. Gravity is not being kind. ..........
Back to the old lady....
She kibbitzed with Hillary about how proud she was of her and how she will be a great president. Hillary shook her head, signed the books that were being shoved in front of her, and then came me.
I was in orange and fuschia in the sea of white T shirts and Hillary buttons. Hillary was signing away and I said " Who's on the cover of your book?"
IF LOOKS COULD KILL.
Hillary and I did lazer beam eyeballs of hate to each other.
If only she knew that the one questioning her was actually her nemesis...Hillary's Lovely Legs.
Suddenly a vice-like grip was on my left arm, and I was pulled away from Hillary. They handed me my book, and I was on my way.
My cameraman friend said he got it on tape and hopes he can use it, but he wanted to know what in the world I said to her to make her use her " GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE face".
I told him that I said " I have Vince Foster's murder on tape".
My silly friend, he thought I was serious. I told him what I really said and he laughed. I hope to get a copy of the tape. It will be priceless.
So I left the Thrifty Acres among the clones clutching their precious books with tears in their eyes, and as I was exiting, I came across the Hillary Rodham Clinton Support Group.
This is an organization of old bitties from Ann Arbor. They all had on matching T-Shirts with a big photo of Hillary on it. They carried signs that said " Hillary" and matching sun visors. They were going to go in for a private meeting with Hillary and a photo session. They have been so supportive of her, she had been through so much and is such a wonderful woman. ( oh spare me)
So that's it. I entered the belly of the beast and got to see old fuzzy face and survived.
So where's my T-shirt?
It's from wearing your husband's testicles.
It's going to be hot in that mask.
ROTFLMAO
...She kibbitzed with Hillary about how proud she was of her and how she will be a great president. Hillary shook her head, signed the books that were being shoved in front of her, and then came me.BRAVO, Hillary's Lovely Legs!I was in orange and fuschia in the sea of white T shirts and Hillary buttons. Hillary was signing away and I said
"Who's on the cover of your book?"IF LOOKS COULD KILL.Hillary and I did lazer beam eyeballs of hate to each other.
If only she knew that the one questioning her was actually her nemesis...Hillary's Lovely Legs..."
Way to go, with your gutsy "INSIDE" FReep!!!
It is almost a badge of honor amoung liberal women, I think. Whenever I visit home (Albany, NY---liberal mecca) I am amazed by the sheer amount of women who look just as she usually does. Unkept hair, no make-up, dissheveled appearance, clothes picked up off the floor...
In retrospect,it will be seen that the protestors were integral to getting her elected. WE WILL BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HELPING HER WIN !
DOESN'T THAT SUCK!
I keep seeing the white underbelly of the nation. The middle age, had kids, divorced and left on their own by a husband that went after a younger woman (just like bill did to hellary), woman that thinks it's about damn time we had a female for President. The woman behind the man, the real power, that was left behind once the man acheived his fame.
The power of this group should not be ignored. They are there and are turning out and it is getting larger and larger each time. They all have the same mantra playing in their heads. "Hillary will be a wonderful first woman President".
Just ask them, or watch the next news broadcast of Hill's book signing. They will eventually demand that Hillary run for President, and she will stall until the last moment (build up the excitement, the curiousity) and then accept. PLAN "A" is working as scheduled.
The reason I say we are helping, is that the protestors just agitate this unplanned for, unaccounted for, ignored group. Make them even more sure they are doing the right thing, putting Hillary in office as President. Our Freeper in the devil outfit gives them the idealistic picture of all manhood as the devil, and Hillary as the WHITE SAINT who will ride in and save middle age women from the ravages of time and loneliness, from the trauma of lost loves and loneliness. You see, that voting group, Divorced or unhappily married women whose husbands dumped them for a younger woman, is what Hillary is appealling to with her book and interviews. That group is one of the largest voting blocs in the US.
But, none of this will be realized until it really happens. By then it will be too late.
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