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The Rainbow Menace
Working For Change ^ | August 6, 2003 | Will Durst

Posted on 08/11/2003 1:31:27 PM PDT by theoverseer

You know what, I think its time for each and every one of us to get down on our scrawny unemployed knees and thank god for George Bush. The man has just gone and rescued the fragile moral fiber of this country once again. Can I get a Hallelujah? Only through the grace of Dubyah's faith have we finally been able to identify the fresh cancer poised to eat through the intestines of the American belly. And that toxic threat is gay marriage. It's hard to imagine anything more subversive than two people of the same sex hugging and kissing and cooking and sleeping together, which unfortunately they are now allowed to do. But apparently that's not enough. Now, they want the same social benefits decent God- fearing people possess AND protections under the law as well. As Justice Scalia says, the radical agenda of these sodomites will not end until they have permeated society disguised as ordinary human beings.

The only way to avert this danger and save ourselves from the seditious spread of the heathen spawn represented by those so called loving people claiming they only wish to be with each other is to prevent them from holding partnership rights under the law, at all, ever. See, if we can only do that, we'll be perfectly fine. And we won't have to worry about those nasty horrible terrorists anymore, or where Saddam and Osama are or why the economy is flatter than a Kansas wheat field after harvest. And that's why we’ve got to clamp down on these poisonous perverts burrowing into the midsection of our heartland with their blasphemous ceremonies.

This choir has sung before. It's the same standard hymn 37 states have already hummed passing the "Defense of Marriage Act," which defines marriage as a union between one man and one woman ONLY and bars recognition of same sex marriages from other states, in case one of the Sneaky Godless ones like Oregon or California or Vermont tries to pull something tricky. Smart move, actually, since same sex marriages are now legal in Canada, Belgium and the Netherlands. You know, the Sneaky Godless countries who also refuse to treat marijuana smokers like the heinous criminals they are.

This pendulum swing to the wrong side of the rainbow must be nipped in the tulip bud immediately. Television networks have recently discovered that niche marketing focusing on gays can translate into fat ratings. And though networks are run by huge conglomerates headed up by conservative CEOs, we all know what can happen when a good and decent ideologue is forced to choose between his beliefs and a big pile of green.

Even the Catholic Church has weighed in on the matter with the Pope threatening to ex-communicate any priest officiating at a gay union, although to perfectly honest, having the Catholic Church on our side in this one is like using Mike Tyson as an expert witness in Anger Management. Like having oil companies write our national environmental standards. Sorry, bad analogy there.

The specter of gay dominance over our culture looms on the horizon like a black, size gazillion, three-button Gianni Versace suit with contrast piping and a silk crew t. How long before the streets of every small American town are transformed into idyllic playgrounds for men and women strolling unashamed, holding hands flaunting their "normalcy" in front of our children?

It's an imminent peril and not merely a desperate distraction like the loony left insists. I repeat: this is not a distraction. Just like the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq weren't a distraction. No, this is even more of not a distraction than the weapons in Iraq weren't a mass distraction. What I mean is, this is even less destruction than that. In other words, no distraction at all. You know what I mean.


TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Culture/Society; Front Page News; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: buttpirate; deviant; dyke; homosexual; lesbian; penisworshipper; perverted; polesmoker; queer; trollalert; workingforperversion
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To: MineralMan
My goodness aren't we touchy. The difference is that I KNOW these people. Yes, there are sick heterosexual parents, however they are a small minority and I've had contact with all of 1 pair of lesbians with children and they have far surpassed the stereo type. I think it's twisted that they are doing this to a little girl and I've every right to frown upon it as a mother who loves and cherishes her own daughters.

Now, I know and am friends with several homosexual men and they would not bring up children because they are smart enough to know that it's not a healthy environment for children.

I'm not endorsing government regulation of the behavior I'm merely expressing my outrage that some elements of the gay community would breed offspring to either A) breed more gays or B) satisfy their own desire to have children regardless of the fact that children thrive best with the love of a man and a woman (and that means married....i equally disdain single parents, spouses who cheat and ditch the kids etc.)

So, that being said why don't you lighten up a little bit and quit harping on everyone who has a different opinion so much. It's just life and you're supposed to be happy not so darn ornry all the darn time.
21 posted on 08/11/2003 2:28:41 PM PDT by volchef (Go Big Orange!)
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To: MineralMan
I must say that I will agree to disagree with you. I believe according to the Bible, which is my absolute standard, that homosexuality is wrong. Just as adultery and other sins are also wrong. None is more black or white than the other. I can't control someone else's reproductive life, but if they lead that life, they will not reproduce. They must bow their heads to the Nature that God created when they DO attempt to reproduce. There must be a sperm and an egg. Male and female. That's just the way it is. I know homeosexuals -- in fact, my ob is one. She's an AWESOME doctor. But she's not in your face about her lifestyle. I can deal with that. I will let "my Diety" take on sin -- but I will not sit idly by and not stand up for what I believe to be the Truth. That is one thing I think we DO agree on. We just have different ideas about what that Truth is.
22 posted on 08/11/2003 2:31:19 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: MineralMan
Sorry, MineralMan, you've got it backward.

These people are in the business of taking away our rights. They are doing this by forcing a redefinition of marriage. They are doing this by requiring us to live a lie, that is, that marriage is something other than a man and a woman. And if they succeed, our right to our religious beleifs will be gone, since we will have to treat two "married" men like any other couple.

This is about the destruction of our rights. It is not about people being left alone to mind their own business. It's about rubbing our noses in it.

That there are sick marriages, and bad heterosexual parents, is nothing to the point. That is a cheap dodge.

And how, pray tell, is it OK to abridge my right to smoke, or to eat fast food? The claim is that it imposes a burden on the rest of us. I don't think that's legit, but if it is, then where does anyone get off imposing the costs of homosexual marriage (spouse benefits, etc) on the rest of us? You can't have it both ways....unless you're a leftist, I guess.
23 posted on 08/11/2003 2:32:26 PM PDT by Glock22
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To: volchef
"My goodness aren't we touchy. The difference is that I KNOW these people. Yes, there are sick heterosexual parents, however they are a small minority and I've had contact with all of 1 pair of lesbians with children and they have far surpassed the stereo type."

Let me see if I have this right. You're judging lesbian parents based on the single example with which you're familiar? Is that what you're saying?
24 posted on 08/11/2003 2:32:44 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: volchef
I'm not endorsing government regulation of the behavior I'm merely expressing my outrage that some elements of the gay community would breed offspring to either A) breed more gays or B) satisfy their own desire to have children regardless of the fact that children thrive best with the love of a man and a woman (and that means married....i equally disdain single parents, spouses who cheat and ditch the kids etc.)

Dittos to you.

25 posted on 08/11/2003 2:33:29 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: MineralMan
Did you read what I said???????? I said SOME elements of the gay community. Goodness.
26 posted on 08/11/2003 2:34:27 PM PDT by volchef (Go Big Orange!)
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To: MineralMan
How about leaving folks alone to carry on their private lives as they choose? How about granting others the same respect you want for yourself? How about letting your deity take care of sin instead of taking the job on for yourself?

Mr. mineral man. This is what people wish would happen. But those nice folks keep slapping us in the face with their perversion.
27 posted on 08/11/2003 2:36:34 PM PDT by icu2
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To: Glock22
You know, you're right and I think that's why it bothers me so much. It's a denegration of what we hold sacred -- our marriages.
28 posted on 08/11/2003 2:37:08 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: StarCMC
"I must say that I will agree to disagree with you. I believe according to the Bible, which is my absolute standard, that homosexuality is wrong. Just as adultery and other sins are also wrong. None is more black or white than the other. I can't control someone else's reproductive life, but if they lead that life, they will not reproduce. "


You're absolutely entitled to believe whatever you wish. I would not ever take that away from you. However gays can and do reproduce. That's a fact. Since you cannot control anyone's reproductive life, then you'll simply have to accept that homosexuals have offspring. Not a thing you can do about it.

Personally, I know kids of homosexual parents. Some are good kids; some are rotten kids. I could say the same about the children of heterosexual parents. Same thing.

I just get tired of folks saying that gays shouldn't be allowed to reproduce, but who then back down and say they don't really mean they shouldn't be allowed to by law.

How else would they be stopped from reproducing. A turkey baster'll do it any day of the week.

How about heterosexual couples who use artificial insemination because one of them is not fertile? How do you feel about that unnatural means of reproduction?
29 posted on 08/11/2003 2:38:14 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: MineralMan
However gays can and do reproduce

Not without help. You can't get both a sperm and an egg from either gender.

30 posted on 08/11/2003 2:40:05 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: icu2
"Mr. mineral man. This is what people wish would happen. But those nice folks keep slapping us in the face with their perversion.
"

Really? When do they do that? How do they do that any more than heterosexuals make their sexuality known? I see lots more hetero couples making out in the park than I do gays. I don't like either activity in public.
31 posted on 08/11/2003 2:40:44 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: StarCMC
"However gays can and do reproduce
Not without help. You can't get both a sperm and an egg from either gender."

Wow. How do you feel about in vitro fertilization and artificial insemination for heterosexual couples? Many folks can't reproduce without help. It's a big industry in this country.
32 posted on 08/11/2003 2:42:15 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: Glock22
These people are in the business of taking away our rights. They are doing this by forcing a redefinition of marriage. They are doing this by requiring us to live a lie, that is, that marriage is something other than a man and a woman. And if they succeed, our right to our religious beleifs will be gone, since we will have to treat two "married" men like any other couple.

Too bad we started down that slippery slope by having Government extend privleges due to marital status.

Perhaps it's time to separate the religious portion from the secular portion of marriage, and let the government allow an arbitrary set of rules to define a couple.

Then let the churches do whatever they want wrt the sacred portion of marriage.
33 posted on 08/11/2003 2:44:51 PM PDT by cryptical
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To: MineralMan
You can't argue with nature Mineral Man. If gay couple #1 could reproduce without using artificial insemination, etc, and gay couple #2 was having trouble conceiving, then I'd say your argument holds water. Hetero #1 couple CAN and DOES conceive without any artificial means. Then Hetero #2 using artificial means to acheive the same result makes sense.
34 posted on 08/11/2003 2:46:16 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: cryptical
"Perhaps it's time to separate the religious portion from the secular portion of marriage, and let the government allow an arbitrary set of rules to define a couple.

Then let the churches do whatever they want wrt the sacred portion of marriage.

"

Make sense to me. Leave the "God" stuff to the churches and the civil law stuff to the states.
35 posted on 08/11/2003 2:46:41 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: MineralMan
Coming from an atheist, it's interesting you bring up God! LOL!
36 posted on 08/11/2003 2:47:46 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: StarCMC
"You can't argue with nature Mineral Man. If gay couple #1 could reproduce without using artificial insemination, etc, and gay couple #2 was having trouble conceiving, then I'd say your argument holds water. Hetero #1 couple CAN and DOES conceive without any artificial means. Then Hetero #2 using artificial means to acheive the same result makes sense.
"

What nature? If a lesbian woman is artificially inseminated, she gets pregnant the same way the heterosexual woman does. No difference. None at all.
37 posted on 08/11/2003 2:48:12 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: MineralMan
I have to leave the thread -- gotta go pick up my 2 naturally conceived children and 1 which I needed a little help for from their grandma who is my natural mother. I'll check in later.
38 posted on 08/11/2003 2:49:05 PM PDT by StarCMC
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To: StarCMC
"Coming from an atheist, it's interesting you bring up God! LOL!"

If you noticed, I put "God" in quotation marks, to indicate that it is a concept, not a reality. You believe in a deity, I suppose, but reject lots of other religion's deities, Hinduism for example. Well, I believe in just one fewer deities than you do.

39 posted on 08/11/2003 2:49:42 PM PDT by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: MineralMan
Yes, but lesbian woman being inseminated with male sperm is not what is happening in her regular lesbian relationship. I HAVE to go -- sorry -- interesting conversation. I am not converted.
40 posted on 08/11/2003 2:50:30 PM PDT by StarCMC
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