Young men are running from marriage

Orlando Sentinel ^ | 07/02/2003 | Susan Reimer

[Tank-FL]

Other than a 29-inch waist and a full head of hair, there isn't much to recommend the twentysomething male.

He is footloose and fancy-free -- except for the fact that he is likely to be living with his parents. It takes him longer to leave home than his women friends, and he is more likely to return.

He is, of course, sexually active and therefore at increased risk of unmarried fatherhood, but he doesn't especially like kids. He considers them a financial burden and an irritant in any relationship with the mother.

He is openly suspicious that a woman would try to trap him with a pregnancy or that a one-night stand would result in a pregnancy and a long-term parenting relationship with a woman he doesn't care about and doesn't want to marry. This fear, however, doesn't keep him from regularly waking up with a stranger.

He has no biological clock because he can father children well past middle age, so he is in no hurry to marry. He is looking for a "soul mate," and he believes there is someone out there whom he is destined to love.

[FITZ]

Women demanded and got all that thrown away. Men are again free to be losers.

A guy whose parents allow him to mooch off them well into his 30's is too late for any woman to fix by any demands. It seems in this example, the guy's parents are the problem. They're allowing him to be a teenager all his life.

[Valin]

NOTE I did say sometimes.
Just setting the record straight.

[Ta Wee]

A guy whose parents allow him to mooch off them well into his 30's is too late for any woman to fix by any demands. It seems in this example, the guy's parents are the problem. They're allowing him to be a teenager all his life.


Yes. They should have tossed him out the door a long time ago.

Interesting how EVERYTHING is the fault of women. If men decide to be boys forever, it's the woman's fault. This is hogwash, because not all men remain boys indefinitely.

[homeschool mama]

Duly noted. Snicker :o)

[DManA]

Maybe you missed, or disagree with the point of the story. The loser is becoming the norm. Maybe you have a different explanation?

[MissAmericanPie]

How many 25+ guys do you know personally that are not married? How many 30+ guys do you know that are single or have never been married? I can think of only one and he's been in a relationship with the same girl since Jr. High.

I think this article is wishful thinking on the part of some anti-social type.

[sylar]

If a woman gets knocked up out of wedlock, it is half her fault. I don’t see how anyone can blame these types of problems completely on men. I don’t understand why the responsibility of women is not given the slightest consideration.

[T'wit]

Thanks for the reminder. George Gilder was (is) the lonely prophet on this one, and boy, was he right. The feminists dreamed up a "Pig of the Year" award (or somesuch) for him c. 1976, and he wore the title with such humor and grace that he retired the trophy.

[FITZ]

The article says he's living with his parents ---that implies he's got a father who is allowing him to loaf all his life. I think it's partially women ---but what kind of fathers are going to allow their sons to become like this guy? It seems there is a generation of parents who decided to allow their young ones never to grow up.

[Our man in washington]

TODAY'S FEMINIST SYMPOSIUM

Seminar #1: Why Woman Should be in Charge of a Relationship

This seminar will focus on the natural superiority of women, and why, because of our superior caring skills and maturity, we women should make the final decisions in a relationship or marriage.

Seminar #2: Demanding that Men Meet Your Needs

This seminar will discuss empowerment for women. After centuries of being treated as property, women should demand that men meet their needs. The speaker will explain how a man should be expected to handle repairs, bring flowers, do an equal share of cleaning, etc. The speaker will argue that such tasks should not be thought of as favors but minimum expectations owed to a liberated woman.

Seminar #3: Eliminating Sexism in Relationships

This seminar will help women to resist sexist demands of their male lovers. A workshop will help women love their bodies as they are. We will learn that we should be able to put on as much weight as our bodies desire and men shouldn't demand that we change ourselves. We will have an empowering "burn-a-thon" at the end where we will burn makeup, pantyhose, high heels and other items that enslave us.

Seminar #4: Equality in Child-raising

This seminar will help us challenge the myth that child raising is women's work. We will learn how men should be expected to do 50 percent of raising the child, as well as bringing in sufficient income for the family.

Seminar #5: Empowerment Through Divorce

In this seminar, we will talk about the reasons for divorce. We will hear from women who got divorced because their husband accidentally left clothes on the floor once on the floor or because the woman just wanted to do something different. We will also discuss how to use the legal system to get the lion's share of the assets. We will also cover how to have the kids 100 percent of the time if the women so desires.

Seminar #6: Why Won't Men Marry?

In this session, we will open up the floor for discussion. Men have been increasingly reluctant to marry lately, and we can't figure out why. We invite our audience to share their ideas.

[Valin]

There's an old movie "Shenandoah" where Jimmy Stewart is talking to a young man who wants to marry his daughter.
JS Do you like her?
YM Oh yes I'm maddly in love with her, there's nothing I wouldn't do for her, I can't live without her.
JS That's not the what I asked you, I want to know do you like her?

[Ta Wee]

Maybe you missed, or disagree with the point of the story. The loser is becoming the norm. Maybe you have a different explanation?


The only part I disagree with is that I would greatly expand the age range. There are a lot of boys around, but few men.

Extending adolescence into the 20s and tolerating "failure to launch" is the root cause.

When the guys who thought they "have it all" look around at age 65 and realize all they have in the world is an illegimate child they fathered whom they have seen twice, and that nobody in the world cares whether they live or die, what will they think of the "have it all" life then?

[Valin]

do an equal share of cleaning

Equal? And the writer calles herself a feminist..I don't think so!

[philosofy123]

The TV ads are constantly portraying men as stupid buffoons. They need corrections from the women; and even the children have more sense then men! Now, with this society utter disrespect of ALL men as worthless stupid useless creatures, and the government/corporate push for women hiring and forced promotion; we have currently ended up with young men who have no jobs/earn less/have less self confidence. If men do not band together to object to the constant humiliation from TV commercials, and corporate favoritism, they will end up being second class citizens for life.

[disclaimer]

Notice that a woman wrote the article, Susan Reimer, and nothing is said about feminism, domestic abuse law and family court. Instead, men are just irresponsible boys living at home according to her.

[Ta Wee]

TODAY'S FEMINIST SYMPOSIUM


Yes, it's true. Women are the cause of all of society's woes, and since they are the bane of the planet, all you insightful guys should just get it over with: kill all the women, and you will have paradise!

[MalcolmS]

>>>On the other hand, any guy who gives love without a glove is an idiot. <<<


Yeah sure. Even the sitcom writers on Friends know better than that.

Ross: "How did this happen?"

Rachael: "Condoms are only effective 97% of the time."

He is utterly shocked by that… "No they're not!"

"Yes they are."

"Well, they should put that on the box!"

"They do!"

"No they don't!" He runs off to go get his box and is looking it over, then says something like "They should put it in bolder print!"

Rachel says she was freaking out at first too…

Ross says "I'm not freaking out! I'm upset… as a consumer!" while he holds up the condom box.

P.S. In real life, condom effectiveness is more like 80-90%. Think about a small 4-year college with only 5,000 students. Assume that male/female is divided 50%/50% and that half are sexually active. That leaves 1250 active couples. Assume they use condoms, even at 97% effectiveness (per year), after four years there's going to be 150 pregnancies!

Since many premarital sexual encounters involve a certain amount of inebriation and loss of judgement, condoms may not be used, or may be used incorrectly.

[tdadams]

I think you probably hit the nail on the head.

[Nea Wood]

Interesting how EVERYTHING is the fault of women.

Sure seems that way, doesn't it, especially on these FR threads? IMO, there's plenty of blame to go around, and women needn't take on more than 50% of it.

[Capt.YankeeMike]

I believe it IS so...with the feminist driven family courts and confiscatory child support laws, millions of boys watched their fathers get raped by the system, and they are in no hurry to go down that road...what other possible outcome could there be?