Posted on 11/26/2001 9:13:15 AM PST by Phantom Lord
Alright, this is a total vanity. I didn't post it under "Breaking News" so relax.
My mother and aunts have been pestering my wife and I about when we are going to have children. Lately, we have taken to coming up with the worst possible names for babies and telling them we are considering names first. Well, they get real upset with some of them and even get angry with us for even considering them.
My mother in law is coming down for Christmas and it is inevitable that when she, my mother, and my aunts get together they will gang up on us about having kids. So, what I need from my fellow FReepers is a good list of really bad baby names to suggest to them as names we are considering. You help and creativity is greatly appreciated.
Oh, the last name is Terwilliger if that helps at all.
For Terwilliger, how about any name beginning with the letter "N" like Norman who would then be Enter Williger.
Worst product names (people who name their children after products should be shot): E-Z Off, Panasonic, Spic-N-Span. Better: Remington Microshave.
Worst gender-bending names: boys named "Sue;" girls named Dick. Better: Chris and Pat.
Worst earth/nature names: Hurricane or Mud. Slightly better: Rain and Sky.
Worst "character" names: Hysteria, Caprice, Dyslexia. Slightly better: Chastity or Charity. Best: Faith and Hope.
Worst names from literature: Fagin, Scrooge. Better: Oliver, Dorothy.
Worst alternate spellings: Gennifer, Vickee. Better: Tomas, Stefan.
Just plain cruel: Robot, Dog-boy, Pumpkin, Weiner, Fish.
I have a :
Wesleigh Michelle ( daughter )
Mason Tyler ( son )
Miles Andrew ( son )
Jacob Emery ( son )
The names may not be original but the kids sure are!
Should I ask her if the hermaphrodite Jamie Lee Curtis was with them?
Arantxa is the tennis player.
Her native language would be Catalan. The name "Arantxa" is actually a derivation from the name of a Basque saint and appears in different forms throughout the Basque region. The "txa" at the end of her name is because she uses a regional spelling. In Castillian Spanish, it is spelled "Arancha".
I concede, none of that will make it music to your ears.
I figure his parents were real, real cruel.
As to a first name, though, I would think Cuthbert takes the cake.
For real - I swear to Ray Charles.
Hard to top Fair Hooker....
Honorary Mention (from 17th ed. Sports Encyclopedia): Vickey Ray Anderson, Ephesians Bartley, Aubrey Beavers, Veno Belk, Lou Benfatti, Orlando Bobo, Jocelyn Borgella, Cap Boso, Garland Boyette, Bubby Brister, Tedy Bruschi, Plaxico Burress, Butler By'not'e, Mossy Cade, Stoney Case, Kerry Cash, Alcides Catanho, Boobie Clark, Topper Clemons, Stalin Colinet, Ferric Collons, Toi Cook, Carlester Crumpler, Kirby Dar Dar, Dermontti Dawson, Jimmy DeRatt, Jim Dick, Bucky Dilts, Demetrius DuBose, Forey Duckett, Jubilee Dunbar, Onzy Elam, Jimbo Elrod, Julian Fagan, Jitter Fields, Jean Fugett, Wentford Gaines, Hokie Gajan, Thane Gash, Blenda Gay, African Grant, Torrian Gray, Ruffin Hamilton, Kwante Hampton, Emile Harry, Hessley Hempstead, I.M. Hipp, Priest Holmes, Estus Hood, Harlan Huckleby, Tunch Ilkin, Tyoka Jackson, Dietrich Jells, Trezelle Jenkins, Filmel Johnson, Undra Johnson, Rulon Jones, Vyto Kab, Muadianvita Kazadi, Leander Knight, Le-Lo Lang, Oudious Lee, Zeph Lee, Kamil Loud, Pratt Lyons, Massimo Manca, D'Artangian Martin, Saladin Martin, Deems May, Alvoid Mays, Kivuusama Mays, Hurvin McCormack, Kez McCorvey, Loaird McCreary, John McCrumbly, Mardye McDole, Molly McGee, Kanavis McGhee, Karmeeleyah McGill, Kaipo McGuire, Secedrick McIntyre, Zion McKinney, Terdell Middleton, Ostell Miles, Bronzell Miller, Lawyer Milloy, Wonder Monds, Maulty Moore, Haven Moses, Zefross Moss, Browning Nagle, Bjorn Nittmo, Chip Nuzzo, Benji Olson, Eldonta Osborne, Tinker Owens, Sirr Parker, Reno Patterson, Marvcus Patton, Bryce Paup, Christian Peter, Elex Price, Latario Rachal, Errict Rhett, Buster Rhymes, Golden Richards, Travis Roach, Lybrant Robinson, Samari Rolle, Durwood Roquemore, Orpheous Roye, Sebastian Savage, Tawambi Settles, George Shorthose, Alshermond Singleton, Laverne Smith, Vernice Smith, Revie Sorey, Ramondo Stallings, Santo Stephens, Lemuel Stinson, Garth Ten Napel, Ratcliffe Thomas, Weegie Thompson, Godwin Turk, Gunnard Twyner, Norwood Vann, Bracey Walker, Herkie Walls, Elbert Watts, Elnardo Webster, Tripp Welbourne, Aeneas Williams (or Anus Williams as Pat Summerall has pronounced it), Dokie Williams, Lamanzer Williams, Stepfret Williams, Sheddrick Wilson, Tydus Winans, Garo Yepremian, Roynell Young.
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