Posted on 09/27/2001 12:20:43 PM PDT by geaux
Were More Nuts Than You
Orion Ramsey - Friday,
09/21/01, 2:35:00pm
(#58980 of 58989)
To those extremists that perpetrated this crime against our nation, I have a warning for you. There are those of us who look at your actions as irrational, twisted, and completely inhuman. By all measures, what you have done can only be seen as insane.
I have news for you. We're more nuts than you, and it should scare you s***less.
You may think that when you die for your cause, you go to Paradise with 72 virgins, can leave reservations for 70 members of your family, all your sins are forgiven, and you sit at the side of Allah. Big deal. We had 39 guys who rented a Beverly Hills mansion, cut off their nuts, built a web site, and proceeded to poison themselves to death to hitch a ride with aliens out on the Hale-Bopp comet.
You shoot guns into the sky to celebrate victories over enemies, and people are killed by the bullets raining down on them. We not only do this for New Year's Eve in some cities, but we burn houses down, tear up streets, loot and sack our stores, and beat our selves senseless when our sports teams win championships. Sports teams!
We made a sequel to Police Academy 5. We gave an award for singing to two guys who never even sang. We put little sweaters on dogs. We shot John Lennon six times and didn't even aim for Yoko Ono. We think Elvis is still alive. We put Braille on drive-up automatic teller machines.
We think that a simple button on a web site that says "Do not click if you're under 21" will do anything but cause a person under 21 to click on it.
We take a large chunk of the island on which those buildings you destroyed sat and pretend that it isn't a part of our country after all, let people fly in to our airports that we want to kill, drive them in limousines to speak against us on this "pretend territory" land, let them drive back to our airport, and let them fly them back home without a scratch.
We sell hot dogs in packages of ten and the buns in packages of eight. We can't even decide if pitchers should have to bat for themselves or not. All those baseball fields we've got. none of them are even remotely the same size.
We gave millions of dollars to a guy that told us that God was going to kill him if he didn't raise enough money. When he didn't get enough money, he didn't die. So we gave him more money in celebration of the fact that God didn't make him die.
We've managed to keep the formulas for Coca-Cola and Kentucky Fried Chicken secret for decades, we encrypt the most banal communications on our Information Superhighway, and yet we given away our most important nuclear secrets to the Chinese and Russians at the drop of a hat.
And yet, with all this on the A-1 Psycho balance sheet, you still think you're more nuts than us that this won't result in your complete and utter annihilation? One way or another, your way of life will be over, period.
Freedom's kind of a crazy, kooky, nutty thing when you look really close at it and all the bizarre and loony things that can result from it, but it's better than any other ideas anybody else has come up with. It's been that way since 1776, and built to last no matter how insanely we try to screw it up on a daily basis. We are even so nuts and ruthless enough as a nation to start insanely tearing at those of ourselves that even remotely resemble you in such rancorous, deplorable, and angry ways that will make you wonder if Allah has enough glue to piece enough of you back together for a flesh paperweight in Paradise.
We may not know where you are now, but when we do I guarantee you that the majority of our high school children will still have no idea where on the globe where you are or where you will end up being buried. But we will send them anyway, and we will allow those of them that went into the armed services because they didn't manage to get into college still rain down Hell and fire on your worthless hides. It will all come down on you, because we're nuts enough to give all four of our branches of military services extremely powerful and deadly aircraft even though only one of them is actually called the Air Force.
Picking a fight with the most insane nation on Earth with the hope that your message and influence will spread throughout the world, well, that's just downright stupid.
Sometimes I start at the beginning of my bump list or the middle or from the last page. hahhaaha
We're so nuts that....
My absolute Regards,
'Drive on a Parkway - and Park on a Driveway'.
Call items sent by car a "Shipment"
then call items sent by boat..."Cargo"
We make Coyboys wear Two Spurs, when everyone knows that when one side of a horse goes, the other side goes, too.
We don't require Real Estate Agents to sell houses near an Airport specifically to deaf people.
All of our children tell us, their parents, that they want to 'Live their own life' and to let them 'think for themselves'...then watch as they dress and talk just like every other child in the neighborhood.....
Yep..Those Afghans are much more crazy that we silly Americans.....NOT!!!!!!!!
I mean, we invaded Granada, for Pete's sake! We took the 4th largest army in the world and turned it into the 2nd largest army in Iraq in 36 hours. We dropped nukes on Japan and killed more Germans in ONE RAID on Dresden than all Americans COMBINED were lost to the Japanese and Germans in WW2. We took Cuba from Spain and New Mexico from old Mexico just because we felt like it. We won so many Indian wars that we stopped giving them individual names. We hadn't even heard of Korea or French Indochina/Vietnam, but we went to war for a few friends of ours over there just because that's the kind of guys we are.
Serbia, Somalia, Bosnia, Sudan, even Barbary pirates.
So then these jokers come along and kill over 6,000 Americans with our own planes while taking down two of our prestigious buildings?! Heck, we weren't even mad at poor Serbia and look at what we did to their undeserving butts.
Let's face it, other nations just DO NOT understand that Americans won't back down. We stand our ground. Tom Petty even wrote a song about it, and how's THAT for just how crazy we are?!
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