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Fatherless Homes Linked to Mental Illness, Mass Shootings: Author Warren Farrell
epoch times ^ | 8 July A.D. 2022 | Masooma Haq and Jan Jekielek

Posted on 07/09/2022 1:25:18 PM PDT by lightman

Warren Farrell, author of the book “The Boy Crisis: Why Our Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It,” has found that being “dad deprived” is a leading factor in males’ increased mental illness, addiction, and suicide.

He links the mass shootings in 53 developed countries to boys and men who lacked a father figure, and he specifically mentioned six mass shootings that have occurred in the United States in the 21st century.

“All six of those mass school shootings that have killed more than 10 people have been done by boys, and all six of them have been done by boys who have been ‘dad deprived,’ from Sandy Hook right on through to the Texas shooting,” Farrell said during a recent interview for EpochTV’s “American Thought Leaders” program.

Farrell was referring to the 2012 shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, and the May 24, 2022, shooting at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas.

He said that girls are growing up in the same environment as boys, with access to the same media, video games, and guns and dealing with the same mental health issues, but they aren’t committing any of the shootings.

Farrell has made it a part of his mission to educate lawmakers about the importance of fathers in the lives of children, especially young boys. His efforts have resulted in Florida and Kentucky enacting laws that acknowledge the crucial role of the father, especially in the case of divorce.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, a single mother living with her child or children is the second most common living arrangement in the United States, a number that has doubled in the past 50 years.

As of 2020, 21 percent of children, or about 15.3 million, lived with their mother only, compared to 11 percent, or 7.6 million, in 1968.

The Florida Legislature recently passed HB 7065, which allocated $70 million in funding to provide a wide array of family and youth support through the Department of Juvenile Justice (DJJ) and the Department of Children and Families (DCF).

“There are more than 18 million children in our country who live without a father in their home,” said Gov. Ron DeSantis when he signed the bill into law on April 22. “This has a severe impact on children and often leads to dropping out of school, crime, and substance abuse. Incredibly, there are those who diminish the importance of fatherhood and the nuclear family—we will not let that happen in our state. I am proud to say we are doing everything we can to support involved fatherhood in Florida.”

In 2018, Kentucky Gov. Matt Bevin signed a bill into law that automatically presumes both parents will share equal custody of children in the case of divorce, while still providing judges with the discretion to limit shared custody if one of the parents is unfit.

Farrell said it’s good that Florida and Kentucky have taken these steps, but that by and large, the crisis of fatherlessness is still being avoided.

Farrell mentioned the work of psychologist Richard Warshak, who found that children who spend time with both mothers and fathers after divorce had better outcomes later in life, and that the presence of the father was more important than economic variables.

Farrell said Warshak’s study found that 100 percent of academics agreed that children who were raised without a father had the biggest problems.

Farrell said he served on the board of the National Organization for Woman (NOW) in New York City and has spoken all around the world about women’s issues, so he tends to be in line with Democratic thinking on such issues.

When he went to Iowa during the 2020 presidential election to speak with the Democratic candidates, Farrell said candidates John Hickenlooper and Andrew Yang both agreed with him about the epidemic of fatherlessness.

“Their campaign managers, when they started to see that their candidates were agreeing with me, both of their campaign managers came up to me and said, ‘Warren, we can’t afford to have our candidates speak out on the importance of boys having fathers and a lot of father involvement, because we’re afraid to alienate our feminist base.'”

This was not a surprise to Farrell who, having worked in a leadership role of a feminist organization, had seen this type of thinking and the marginalizing of fathers before. These organizations do not put the interests of the children first, but rather the mother, Farrell said. After the Divorce

Farrell said children do better after a divorce when they spend an equal amount of time with both the mother and father, and especially when there is communication and balanced input from both parents. Each parent brings strengths to the raising of a child: mothers tend to set boundaries and praise their children while dads enforce boundaries and allow children to take risks, said Farrell.

“In their enforcement of the boundaries, [dads] build the discipline for the child to accomplish the postponed gratification and the focus on the attention to detail,” he said. “Children raised predominately by dads are far less likely to have ADHD because they’re required to focus on the actual thing that they’re doing.”

The boys that committed these mass shootings at schools suffered from not having a caring, strong male role model. In addition to that, boys are often told their feelings don’t matter, which leads to emotional toxicity, said Farrell.

“Boys who are fatherless, very frequently they are not likely to have that postponed gratification that emanates from boundary enforcement. Therefore they start not doing as well in school,” said Farrell.

He said he’s talked to boys in high school, and the boys said what they learn about in school when it comes to male–female issues is toxic masculinity, without any understanding of the sacrifices that males made that led to that toxicity, as well as the concept of “the patriarchy,” said Farrell.

Modern Feminist Ideology Hurting Boys

Farrell said boys are suffering because they are being told that their masculinity is bad.

“The world was not dominated by a patriarchy. It was dominated by the need to survive, and in order to survive, both males and females were restricted in their roles,” said Farrell, adding that feminism blames men for societal problems and does not take into account the sacrifices they make for their families.

“We are constantly giving boys a negative image of themselves that is leading to a low self-esteem, that is leading to their needing compensations,” he said.

Farrell said that while trying to do good, he also blames himself for being on the board of directors of the NOW for three years, where these detrimental feminist ideas that hurt boys, and ultimately girls, were spread.

Farrell began his work for equal rights of women because he believed in the credo, “I am woman, I am strong,” but now he said he doesn’t support feminism because the feminist movement has changed to, “I am woman, I’ve been wronged.”

This type of thinking is hurting boys, he said, and it needs to change so both boys and girls can benefit from a father’s full input in their lives. Advice for Single Mothers

Farrell advises all single mothers to let the biological father know he is very much needed, and he will respond well.

“When you say, ‘I see now what the positive value of your roughhousing, you’re teasing, you’re allowing our son or daughter to take a risk of walking into a lake and maybe getting lost,’ and what that does, then, the dad will say, ‘Alright, if I can be appreciated, now I’ll be back,” said Farrell

If the biological dad is not able to be involved, Farrell suggests enrolling boys in groups or team sports, where other male role models can help shape their character.

He advises parents to connect with their children, to listen instead of trying to fix their children’s problems, and to have family dinner nights free of media so they can practice these listening skills and deepen the relationship.

“Empathetic parents who are only empathetic create children who are self-centered, thinking that only their needs are being paid attention to,” he said. “So you have to both be empathetic and require of your children that they also listen to your perspective.”

Based on his work with counseling couples, Farrell said that listening needs to extend beyond children to the spouse or former spouse so there is respectful, healthy communication.

Co-parenting couples must realize that no parent intends to harm their child, said Farrell.

Adults must “learn how to hear those that we are not initially inclined to hear and to know how to be criticized by the people we love without becoming defensive,” said Farrell.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: banglist; bastardboom; bastards; bastardy; fatherless; fatherlessness; murphybrown; schoolshooting
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To: ViLaLuz

Girls who grow up in a household with a decent,admirable father learn,among other things: how husbands treat their wives with respect,how fathers treat their daughters with respect...and other important things as well.


21 posted on 07/09/2022 2:43:55 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Covid Is All About Mail In Ballots)
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To: Wuli

We know this lady, who worked for 2 sheriff’s departments to monitor and help children in broken homes. She did this for 30+ years.

According to her anyhome without a father/male figure often put the kids at risk.

She said the most dangerous fatherless home, was one where a man, who was not the father and in particular at a home where the male was abusive and used alcohol and drugs on a regular basis. These so called adult males often hated the children of other men.

In summary:

Besides (1) the “absent father”

a “fatherless home” sometimes has

(2) an occupant-Male but in terms of the children’s emotional and instructional needs is actually absent,

Often the occupant male is (3) a bad (abusive, alcoholic, drug addict, criminal) person. Having that type of occupant-male/father was often worse than a father who was not there at all.

This woman blamed LBJ and his Great Society which destroyed more families than helping them.


22 posted on 07/09/2022 2:47:13 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (Has anyone, recently, seen a Biden sticker on any vehicle and and in particular at/in a gas station!)
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To: Grampa Dave

There was little that was “great” about the “great society” besides the great amount of spending it involved.


23 posted on 07/09/2022 2:51:51 PM PDT by Wuli
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To: Wuli

There was little that was “great” about the “great society” besides the great amount of spending it involved.

LBJ was a role model of an absolutely horrible president and and as a terrible human being.


24 posted on 07/09/2022 3:00:44 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (Has anyone, recently, seen a Biden sticker on any vehicle and and in particular at/in a gas station!)
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To: Grampa Dave

“LBJ was a role model of an absolutely horrible president and and as a terrible human being.”

He represented the FDR wing of the Democrats and they did not trust the Kennedys. FDR sent JFKs dad to be ambassador to Great Britain, to keep him out of Washington D.C.

But Lee Harvey Oslwald gave the FDR wing what they wanted - an old FDR hand who was talented at getting things done in Congress (good at all the corruption and “horse trading”). He continued to use those talents as President.


25 posted on 07/09/2022 3:18:36 PM PDT by Wuli
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To: Wuli
 
 
Yeah - having an enabling, whackjob family is just as bad if not worse.
 
 

26 posted on 07/09/2022 3:37:16 PM PDT by lapsus calami (What's that stink? Code Pink ! ! And their buddy Murtha, too!)
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To: lightman
I will argue with this.

Not that absent fathers are not a problem, they are. Perhaps one of the biggest problems in this country.

But in mass shooters what you find is that they are always liberals.

A conservative knows they are responsible for themselves and have a balanced attitude toward the world. It is not unjust but it is indifferent. Bad things will just happen. It is not a case of someone has it in for you because you stubbed your toe, your homework fell out of your backpack, you planned to do something and it rains. You are not the whipping boy of the universe but you are not the favorite child either. You will have good and bad fortune.

There are times when those bad things will be caused by other humans. Small slights, unjust accusations, losing because the other guy cheated, it is all part of life. And it hurts. But everyone goes through that. The world is unfair, accept it and move on. Try to improve where you can.

The liberal thinks that the world is naturally fair, just and wonderful. If things go wrong it is because someone else made it bad. And that someone else must be punished. It is extreme narcissism. The world revolves around them.

27 posted on 07/09/2022 3:43:57 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear (It is better to light a single flame thrower then curse the darkness. A bunch of them is better yet)
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To: lightman

When did this kind of subject start being news and stop being common sense?? If anyone really needs to be reminded that a fatherless home esp in the big city USA...is for any young man a very confusing/depressing place to be...they are in a sad place indeed.


28 posted on 07/09/2022 3:59:46 PM PDT by know.your.why (If you dont watch the MSM you are uninformed. If you do watch the MSM you are misinformed.)
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To: know.your.why

When did this kind of subject start being news and stop being common sense??


It is a start on the way back. Never belittle small beginnings. The amazing thing is that it is in the media.


29 posted on 07/09/2022 4:02:46 PM PDT by PeterPrinciple (Thinking Caps are no longer being issued but there must be a warehouse full of them somewhere.)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Wars have always left a lot of fatherless children.


30 posted on 07/09/2022 4:31:42 PM PDT by gundog ( It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: Gay State Conservative

Everyone is also leaving abusive mothers who use the kid(s), most often alienating the kid(s) from the father for revenge, spite, money, and who knows how many other reasons.


31 posted on 07/09/2022 4:32:48 PM PDT by Bikkuri (I am proud to be a PureBlood.)
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To: Beowulf9

This is from an article by an author who thinks fathers have value:
“In doing research for my recent column on the importance of fathers in the lives of children, I came across a publication from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services titled “The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children.” This publication is part of a series focusing on child abuse and neglect. I found the points discussed in the publication so compelling I decided to share the information.

Dr. Wade F. Horn, co-founder and former president of the National Fatherhood Initiative, is credited with coining: “The myth of the superfluous father.” “Superfluous” means “exceeding what is sufficient or necessary.” “Superfluous” can also imply unnecessary. Too many men have bought into the idea their role in the home is little more than to provide an extra set of hands. Any father who views himself in this light simply does not understand the value of what a father offers a child.”
Excerpted from here——
https://www.kinston.com/story/special/2020/06/28/seven-key-elements-of-being-effective-father/42241757/


32 posted on 07/09/2022 4:49:30 PM PDT by frank ballenger (You have summoned up a thundercloud. You're gonna hear from me. Anthem by Leonard Cohen)
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To: frank ballenger
“Too many men have bought into the idea their role in the home is little more than to provide an extra set of hands. Any father who views himself in this light simply does not understand the value of what a father offers a child.”

Way too often, the father is viewed by the mother as the family ATM, the money source that provides the house, car, groceries etc, but NOT the leader of the home. The mother plays the one who ‘wears the pants in the family’. And the family court system reinforces that daily, coast to coast. The mother most frequently is the one who filed for divorce, breaking up the family, but the courts still give her access to the father's income, house AND the children.

Father's often contribute to family issues via addictions or adultery. Fathers, especially blacks, abandon their children, which seemingly is an African cultural phenomenon. Those black mothers also had no father/male role model so they certainly cannot raise responsible children.
Blessings to all.

33 posted on 07/10/2022 4:52:12 AM PDT by Tahoe3002 (Yes, indeed!)
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To: lightman

Daughters from fatherless homes wind up just as messed up as sons from fatherless homes.


34 posted on 07/10/2022 3:36:12 PM PDT by Arcadian Empire (The Baric-Daszak-Fauci spike protein, by itself, is deadly.)
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To: Gay State Conservative

Girls who grow up in a household with a decent,admirable father learn,among other things: how husbands treat their wives with respect,how fathers treat their daughters with respect...and other important things as well.
.........................

Yes! The current movement to erase fathers is satanic, definitely borne of hatred of our Heavenly Father. Destroy the children!


35 posted on 07/16/2022 5:30:37 AM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
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