Posted on 10/11/2019 4:52:18 AM PDT by Kaslin
Successful women face special barriers in love and marriage, according to one relationship coach. But that doesn’t mean they can’t still strive for a happily ever after.
On October 9, the Washington Examiner published an opinion piece on, “Why super-successful women struggle in love.” Relationship expert and author Suzanne Venker claimed that “few, if any, women” can have both “power in the world” and “power in bed.” While she backed up her arguments, her piece left something to be desired by women: encouragement.
Venker began by referencing a Wall Street Journal piece, arguing that “As women have become more and more rich, love has indeed become more and more elusive.”
She pointed to an email about one of the women dealing with this very problem – written by the woman’s mother.
“I’d like to talk to you about my daughter who’s a high achiever,” the mom began. “She’s a thirty-eight-year-old, well-educated (two Ivy League schools), creative, intelligent, sophisticated, loving, successful, attractive, with a model-like body, and surprisingly can’t find a desired partner.”
While previously “she wasted many years on several senseless relationships,” her daughter is “extremely unhappy that she doesn’t have a partner,” or children.
In response, Venker urged that not only do successful single women struggle, but also women who serve as the primary breadwinner. There are many reasons why “love becomes a struggle the more successful women become,” she said, including the “pursuit of a post-secondary education and career.”
“Jumping in full throttle and making work the center of one’s life, as young women are encouraged to do, invariably means this group will be unable to take advantage of their greatest marital bargaining power,” she said.
That main “bargaining power” appeared to be beauty.
(Excerpt) Read more at townhall.com ...
” - -ironically even women can’t stand being around other women.”
LOL, I know my comment here is slightly off topic, but I immediately thought of hawks. As an observer of nature I notice most birds flock together when migrating elsewhere. Not hawks. They do fly south but keep a great distance from one another. I have also watched them fight over prey. And I have often wondered just how they get together to mate without one killing the other.
Maybe there is more in common with hawks and super dominant women in that they are both predators and demand to be “king” of their environment much the way the lion is king of animals in Africa. The only guy that would want to marry one of these women would be a super pansy that begs to be dominated and does not care how many boyfriends his wife has.
Yeah, Papa Bear. Yours is the best response so far, and the other responses aren’t bad..
I think I’ve identified the problem by watching HGTV.
They have all of these house hunter shows where a young couple goes looking for a home in some exotic location and the realtor shows them three. Then they have to decide.
Despite somehow being fortunate enough to be able to afford a home approaching a one million listing price by age thirty-something, these women invariably criticize and nitpick and rip each of them to shreds.
THAT right there is your problem.
As Prince observed, maybe you’re just like my mother. She’s never satisfied.
The Buddhists are right about our desires and attachments>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
And the lineages of Christianity also teach unconditional love by virtue of prayer, the Holy Spirit, and the Divine Grace of God.
But all of this is not easy. It takes work and dedication to connect with this aspect of the Heart of Christ and unconditional love.
And it also takes work and dedication in the Buddhist lineages as well.
One doesn’t just fall into it, yet every human being has the ability to connect with unconditional love which is our basic inheritance as human beings.
You got that right. Sexiness is more about attitude and behavior than looks. A beautiful woman who is always grouchy and complaining is less sexy than an average-looking woman who is happy and cheerful.
One definition of love: the willingness to make an effort to promote the happiness and well being of the loved one.
...yet every human being has the ability to connect with unconditional love which is our basic inheritance as human beings.
All one has to do is to surrender to the source of all Love
Cease to struggle, and let go
Well I’m in my mid-20’s and have wasted NO time on senseless relationships, but I’ve found that when a man hears there’ll be no sex before marriage, he sees a senseless relationship and a waste of his time. And depending on his level of education he sees either a religious zealot or a whack job or a lesbian-in-denial.
This although I’m attractive, affluent and well-educated.
Even most men find that reaching the top of the hill means leaving their families behind or at least sidelined.
And no man wants a 38 year old promiscuous power harpy past the next morning. There just isn’t any upside. She has 20 years experience screwing up relationships. Only the massively delusional thinks the next time will be any different.
Well put. Our flaws are often a critical part of who we are, both good and bad.
If you take your flaws into consideration, attempt to mitigate them and work with/around them, you get positive results.
If you ignore your faults and wear them on your back, you get negative results.
And then there is the set of guys who get angry if they have bought dinner three times and you haven’t put out yet.
As an aside, I once came across a paper where somebody did research as to price of wedding versus marriage longevity, and found a negative correlation.
It makes sense to me. A woman who just HAS to have a fairy-tale princess wedding, is not going to be satisfied, long term, with any actual mortal as a husband.
If both have high incomes that is good for both. If only she has than he has to see, than he has to see, then he has to see that he catches up.
All one has to do is to surrender to the source of all Love
Cease to struggle, and let go>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Agreed.
But if one is a successful woman who has all the toughness barriers in place to support her success, one does not know how to surrender.
It seems simple, but for the successful woman, such unconditional surrender is mostly impossible to do because of that habitual toughness.Only at the apex of suffering is that surrender possible, and by then it may be too late for marriage because of the scars of suffering involved.
I love that paths of unconditional love. They are actually the salvation of humanity entire.
It used to be that women, as a group, ostracized promiscuous women. One big reason was that, if easy sex was available to men, it put moral women at a competitive disadvantage.
But modern feminism banned that as "slut-shaming".
On her SiriusXM show Dr. Laura goes on almost a daily diatribe about how the legions of young women who run around slutting it up have ruined things for women like you.
Of the successful women I have dated, it is not that their physical beauty has faded, it is that their arrogance and demanding demeanor has multiplied to levels intolerable, making a peaceful and loving relationship virtually impossible.
I know the point you are making, but when it comes to TV shows, they have to add conflict and drama to keep viewers interested. A lot of that nitpicking may be scripted. Why can’t they make the man be the whiny nitpicker some of the time? I guess they play to the stereotypes.
Dr. Laura once referred to such women as those who won’t let men into their hearts even while they’re letting them into their bodies.
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