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SATIRE My day: Ilhan Omar
Spectator USA ^ | 13 Feb 2019 | Dominic Green

Posted on 02/13/2019 7:09:03 PM PST by Rummyfan

I woke up, thanked Allah for not letting the yahud across the street hypnotize me in my sleep, then crawled to the window and peeked over the sill. The black Volvo was gone. He must have got up early this morning, to stuff more money into the mouths of the other members of the Minnesota delegation. I got up, standing strong.

My husband gets the kids’ breakfast. He’s like a brother to me. Really. It’s in our faith tradition. His support gives me time to do more for my people. There’s so much to do when I get to my office, I barely have time to wipe my feet on the Israeli-flag doormat that members of my progressive and diverse community gave me when I won my House seat by defeating the yahud Phyllis Kahn and Mohamud Noor, who I now believe to be a yahud.

I stopped at Starbucks on the way to the Zionist Occupation Government for a soy chai latte, when I noticed that the barista was looking at me funnily again. Then I heard one of his co-workers call him ‘Ben’. I left without collecting my drink. In Somalia, people say that the Jews put drugs in soy products to make men grow breasts. That’s why many of the men in Occupied Palestine lactate. The Israeli soldiers milk them at checkpoints, and put the milk in their coffee. And we call Israel a democracy.

A pile of letters was waiting on my desk, messages of support because I’m standing strong against Jew money power. Some of the letters are from as far away as the German-speaking community in Argentina and the tribal regions of Afghanistan. There was even one from a proud Muslim activist in Vermont called Bernie...

(Excerpt) Read more at spectator.us ...


TOPICS: News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: notnews; satire; sisterwife
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LOL!
1 posted on 02/13/2019 7:09:03 PM PST by Rummyfan
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To: Rummyfan

“My husband gets the kids’ breakfast. He’s like a brother to me. Really. It’s in our faith tradition.”

Sick. The animal should have typed in “My husband is my brother” as the rumors may be true.


2 posted on 02/13/2019 7:11:58 PM PST by max americana (Happily Fired every stupid liberal at every election since 08' at work. I hope all liberals die.)
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To: Rummyfan
I go to bed early, because I don’t want to be hypnotized by the TV. This what standing strong against Jewish money means. That’s why I boycott the State of Israel and its products, including drip irrigation, USB flash drives, and the board game Rummikub, which is a Mossad hypnosis device. Also no Ben Stiller movies, no Ben & Jerry’s, no Benny Hill, and especially no Ben Affleck, because he is a Zionist sleeper agent, and no Friends either. I’m lying strong.
3 posted on 02/13/2019 7:13:34 PM PST by Rummyfan (In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel.)
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To: Rummyfan

My husband gets the kids’ breakfast. He’s like a brother to me

...that’s cause ya married your brother ya stooopit ****...


4 posted on 02/13/2019 7:14:38 PM PST by Doogle (( USAF.68-73....8th TFW Ubon Thailand....never store a threat you should have eliminated)))
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To: Rummyfan

She really had a hate on for Abrams today. It’s no coincidence that Abrams is of Jewish descent.

Truly contempable scum. Trump is right to call for her resignation. And we should add deportation.


5 posted on 02/13/2019 7:15:35 PM PST by grumpygresh (The only check on a rogue DOJ and FBI is jury nullification.)
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To: Rummyfan
Good stuff! 😀
6 posted on 02/13/2019 7:15:56 PM PST by Sans-Culotte (Time to get the US out of the UN and the UN out of the US!)
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To: Rummyfan
And we are going to have to pay this bitch a pension. If she doesn't wreck the country first.
7 posted on 02/13/2019 7:18:03 PM PST by Rummyfan (In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel.)
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To: Rummyfan

Does the article include a barf bag?


8 posted on 02/13/2019 7:18:04 PM PST by HighSierra5
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To: Rummyfan

Laughing at dumbass Americans who elected her.

9 posted on 02/13/2019 7:22:46 PM PST by Rummyfan (In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel.)
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To: Rummyfan

I bet it burns out before its term is over...


10 posted on 02/13/2019 7:24:43 PM PST by rockrr ( Everything is different now...)
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To: Sans-Culotte

Hilarious!

I’m amazed at the people on this thread who apparently don’t get that this is fantastic satire.


11 posted on 02/13/2019 7:25:18 PM PST by JennysCool
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To: JennysCool

Dang it you spoiled it. It was running about 75% people falling for it.


12 posted on 02/13/2019 7:26:50 PM PST by Rebelbase (If Trump walked on water the press headline would read, "TRUMP CAN'T SWIM".)
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To: JennysCool
> I’m amazed at the people on this thread who apparently don’t get that this is fantastic satire. <

How much did the Israelis pay you to say that?


13 posted on 02/13/2019 7:30:19 PM PST by Leaning Right (I have already previewed or do not wish to preview this composition.)
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To: Rummyfan

Just one question: How does a person like this get elected to office in democratic America?


14 posted on 02/13/2019 7:30:45 PM PST by mikeIII
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To: Rummyfan

the people that elected her ALL think like her and the bulk of them came from the same country as her


15 posted on 02/13/2019 7:32:32 PM PST by cableguymn (We need a redneck in the white house....)
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To: JennysCool

Lol, I was really starting to wonder if I was the only one that got the humor!


16 posted on 02/13/2019 7:33:57 PM PST by gibsosa
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To: Rummyfan

What will it take for Ilhan Omar to be censured?


17 posted on 02/13/2019 7:34:18 PM PST by PBRCat
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To: mikeIII

“Just one question: How does a person like this get elected to office in democratic America?”


Who knows?

You have to admit,though,that this article is very funny!

.


18 posted on 02/13/2019 7:34:27 PM PST by Mears
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To: mikeIII

From a district gerrymandered to be 99% Somali, that’s how.

And since the typical Somali IQ is 65, go figure.


19 posted on 02/13/2019 7:34:37 PM PST by elcid1970 (My gun safe is saying, "Room for one more, honey!")
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To: Rummyfan

Aha! The Zionist entity has tricked us all!/s


20 posted on 02/13/2019 7:40:15 PM PST by QBFimi (It is not your responsibility to finish the work of perfecting the world... Tarfon)
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