Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

100 Women 2016: I am a 'surrendered wife’
BBC ^

Posted on 12/04/2016 1:25:39 PM PST by ameribbean expat

It was incredibly humbling to recognise that I had something to do with why my marriage was failing and perhaps even why my first marriage failed. But it was also empowering.

I didn't know I'd been disrespectful to my husband or even that I'd been controlling and critical.

(Excerpt) Read more at bbc.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: genderwars; marriage
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last
Culture is a pendulum...it swings back and forth...
1 posted on 12/04/2016 1:25:39 PM PST by ameribbean expat
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

Feminism has been much more dangerous to Western Culture than nuclear weapons.


2 posted on 12/04/2016 1:31:45 PM PST by gaijin
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

bookmark


3 posted on 12/04/2016 1:35:50 PM PST by papertyger (The semantics define how we think.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

Never in recorded history has “too much great sex” been cited as a reason for getting a divorce.

Draw your own conclusions.


4 posted on 12/04/2016 1:37:39 PM PST by RKBA Democrat (Right versus left is no longer as relevant as Nationalist versus globalist.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

I give her credit for figuring it out.

I hope the family lives in peace forward.


5 posted on 12/04/2016 1:37:45 PM PST by DoughtyOne (jcon40, "Are we be coming into the age of Sanity?")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: gaijin

Well, American girls grow up in an environment so steeped in anti-male doctrines it’s no surprise they reach the age of marriage with zero ability to respect their husbands - or even to comprehend why it might be beneficial to them to do so. Takes a lot of deprogramming.


6 posted on 12/04/2016 1:44:16 PM PST by Mr. Jeeves ([CTRL]-[GALT]-[DELETE])
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: gaijin
Put on the Drudge Report - FLASHING SIREN
7 posted on 12/04/2016 1:48:06 PM PST by keving (We get the government to vote)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

From the story, here are the six principles of being a “Surrendered Wife”:

1. Relinquishes inappropriate control of her husband
2. Respects her husband’s thinking
3. Receives his gifts graciously and expresses gratitude for him
4. Expresses what she wants without trying to control him
5. Relies on him to handle household finances
6. Focuses on her own self-care and fulfillment

1-4 seem reasonable to me. With respect to 5, I think the household finances should be handled together or by whichever partner has more of an aptitude for it. I’m not quite sure what 6 means.

I don’t care for the term “surrendered wife,” but the thrust of these principles seems to me to be “don’t be a control freak and treat your husband like an adult who has a brain.”

I have never been married, but I see a lot of guys who put up with some really controlling behavior from their wives. I wouldn’t tolerate that kind of crap from any man, nor would I respect a man would tolerate from me. I also would not treat any man I loved that way.


8 posted on 12/04/2016 1:50:11 PM PST by Huntress ("Politicians exploit economic illiteracy." --Walter Williams)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: gaijin

It’s what led to the women’s vote.

‘Nuff said.


9 posted on 12/04/2016 1:54:01 PM PST by Mariner (War Criminal #18)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: gaijin

Feminism is the outgrowth of envy. Much of it is the result of women competing with each other in the physical attraction game. For those who don’t have the physical appearance to win in the competition, envy causes them to attack the winners and the competition itself.


10 posted on 12/04/2016 1:54:03 PM PST by jonrick46 (The Left has a mental disorder: A totalitarian mindset..)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Mercat

Ping! What do you think? I’ve always thought it would nice if I could find myself a fellow my age like Mr. Mercat.


11 posted on 12/04/2016 1:54:26 PM PST by Huntress ("Politicians exploit economic illiteracy." --Walter Williams)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RKBA Democrat

Haha, Ya, I’ve never heard that being the reason either.


12 posted on 12/04/2016 1:55:09 PM PST by Bulwyf
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Huntress

Gifts?

Married women get gifts?


13 posted on 12/04/2016 1:57:50 PM PST by mom4melody
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: gaijin

I have been married for 58 years. My secret to a long and loving marriage is 1) marry your best friend and keep him your best friend, 2) respect him as the leader of the family, 3) use Christian principles in the marriage...God knows what will work, 4) Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”, and 5) never let romance disappear from your relationship. Probably there is more but it has become so much of my life I forget about it. :)


14 posted on 12/04/2016 2:00:49 PM PST by native texan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

Criticism kills love. If more couples understood that, there would be fewer divorces.


15 posted on 12/04/2016 2:01:48 PM PST by Maceman (Screw the Party. Save the Country.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

1. “Mankind is an invader, a VIRUS, feeding off of Victim Mother Earth.”

2. “Men PREDATE upon women; they are natural enemies.”

3. Wealthy people prosper owing to black magic and trickery, they do so at the EXPENSE of less wealthy people.

These are the three huge, powerful ideas that must be utterly destroyed.


16 posted on 12/04/2016 2:03:00 PM PST by gaijin
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Huntress

I have no problem with any of them except for #5.

I cannot imagine why men should handle finances.

My husband did it because I didn’t want to and he was good at it,but in many cases the situation is reversed.My father-in-law had my mother-in-law do everything——he just had some pocket cash (This was pre credit cards)

Rule #5 makes no sense.

.


17 posted on 12/04/2016 2:07:00 PM PST by Mears
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat
I didn't know I'd been disrespectful...

There's a big key right there.

LoveAndRespect.com has a lot of answers.
18 posted on 12/04/2016 2:08:42 PM PST by \/\/ayne (I regret that I have but one subscription cancellation notice to give to my local newspaper.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

The six principles of being a ‘Surrendered Wife’
Relinquishes inappropriate control of her husband
Respects her husband’s thinking
Receives his gifts graciously and expresses gratitude for him
Expresses what she wants without trying to control him
Relies on him to handle household finances
Focuses on her own self-care and fulfilment
Source: Laura Doyle, author of The Surrendered Wife
**************************************************

I’m not a “Surrendered Wife”. I married my best friend, something that I never imagined doing. My husband does all of the cooking, handles all of the finances, helps out with cleaning, laundry and yard work. He’s a better person than I am, and why he married me is a mystery, but I thank God that he did.


19 posted on 12/04/2016 2:08:49 PM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ameribbean expat

Mmkay....I’ve said this before on FR, and I’ll say it again (and I got this quote right here at FR): Keep his belly full, his ego boosted, and his balls empty, and he will worship the ground you walk on. Works for me. Together 33 years, married 24.


20 posted on 12/04/2016 2:15:20 PM PST by Mama Shawna
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson