Posted on 12/13/2013 9:51:23 AM PST by Impala64ssa
In a shocking display of heterosexuality and patent homophobia, President Obama kissed Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt of Denmark, but not Prime Minister David Cameron of Great Britain, a male.
"I was hoping for something a bit more intimate, really," said a chagrined Cameron, "but all I got was this rather anemic handshake." When a reporter for BBC asked if being included in the now world famous 'selfie' softened his feelings of rejection, Cameron responded, "It wasn't really the same thing. Perhaps he was trying to meet me halfway, but it seemed more like a half-hearted apology. I put the best face on it I could muster, but cried myself to sleep that night."
"What kind of message are we sending our children!?" said an outraged Jan van Dyke, president of the Rainbow Institute. "In an age of enlightenment when comic book super heroes are coming out left and right and admitting their true gay yearnings, we get a president kissing an attractive head of state of the opposite sex! It’s not only sickening, it’s a setback for all the progress we've made in gay rights since the 1950s. What’s more, it’s a slap in the face to all lesbian, gay, transgendered, queer, conflicted, and retransgendered that make up 97% of the population. While we demand an apology, we do applaud Michelle Obama for taking a stand by sitting down next to the Danish prime minister and symbolically representing us. We thought the president had 'evolved' on gay rights, and now he stabs us in the back with this despicable, and may I say, blatantly patriarchal act. What's next, a promise that if you like your partner you can keep your partner?"
"It was a bad move on the part of the president," said political analyst Dick Morris, "At a time when he's losing the Hispanic vote and even the Millennials have turned on him, he goes and pulls off a stunt like this? It was only a matter of time, and not much of that, either, before the gay community would turn on him also."
At an emergency press meeting at the White House, Art Carney told reporters, "This is an ongoing situation, and the president was frankly quite surprised to learn that he had kissed another head of state." Later the president himself appeared opening some prepared remarks with, "I didn't do that, somebody else made that happen."
Michelle Obama could not be reached for comment.
Shouldn’t that be heterophobic?
Satire.
The “Art Carney” is a nice touch!!
To the Moon Alice!
Hey, Ralphie BOY!! (whew, good thing Jackie Gleason was White or I’d be in real trouble ;))
Jay Carney really should start showing up at the Pressers wearing a white t-shirt and a black vest....unfortunately this Administration doesn’t have a sense of humor.
lol
Did Cameron really say that??? If so that's a *huge* putdown.And if he did I say "well done,sir"!
SATIRE...
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