Posted on 04/03/2013 8:09:12 AM PDT by TSgt
Like me, millions of high-school seniors with sour grapes are asking themselves this week how they failed to get into the colleges of their dreams. It's simple: For years, theywewere lied to.
Colleges tell you, "Just be yourself." That is great advice, as long as yourself has nine extracurriculars, six leadership positions, three varsity sports, killer SAT scores and two moms. Then by all means, be yourself! If you work at a local pizza shop and are the slowest person on the cross-country team, consider taking your business elsewhere.
What could I have done differently over the past years?
For starters, had I known two years ago what I know now, I would have gladly worn a headdress to school. Show me to any closet, and I would've happily come out of it. "Diversity!" I offer about as much diversity as a saltine cracker. If it were up to me, I would've been any of the diversities: Navajo, Pacific Islander, anything. Sen. Elizabeth Warren, I salute you and your 1/32 Cherokee heritage.
I also probably should have started a fake charity. Providing veterinary services for homeless people's pets. Collecting donations for the underprivileged chimpanzees of the Congo. Raising awareness for Chapped-Lips-in-the-Winter Syndrome. Fun-runs, dance-a-thons, bake salesas long as you're using someone else's misfortunes to try to propel yourself into the Ivy League, you're golden.
...
Then there was summer camp. I should've done what I knew was bestgo to Africa, scoop up some suffering child, take a few pictures, and write my essays about how spending that afternoon with Kinto changed my life. Because everyone knows that if you don't have anything difficult going on in your own life, you should just hop on a plane so you're able to talk about what other people have to deal with.
(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...
I could not find it on Amazon, do you have a link? Thanks.
Some asked my why I still call them “manhole” covers. I told him that if he could show me a female (one that looked like a female, and not wearing a flannel shirt) go into one, I’d start calling them ‘personhole’ covers.
“There are people starving in Kentucky.”
People in Kentucky have the gospel available to them.
Sorry, her SAT score is too weak.
2120? Please girl, in my day you needed a near perfect score to get into Ivy League.
Ivy is a waste of money anyway and nearly everyone there has a haughty sense of entitlement.
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