Posted on 07/23/2010 8:47:03 PM PDT by vbmoneyspender
In the old days, when someone wanted you to apologize it was for something you had done to them. And the way it worked was they would ask you for an apology and you would tell them to go screw themselves. But we live in a new age where apologies are done differently. Nowadays, the way apologies work is that you demand that someone you don't personally know apologize to someone else that you don't personally know. This is another form of modern outsourcing and, as such, has become quite the rage in the more technologically sophisticated areas of the United States.
As a result, in order to keep up with the times, I am creating this Apology Thread and starting it off with my own demands for apologies from people I have never met. First, I demand that George Lucas apologize to Star Wars fans for writing and directing Stars Wars Episodes 1, 2 and 3 and that he further apologize to movie fans in general for producing Howard the Duck. Second, I demand that Norm Coleman apologize to the good people of the state of Minnesota for losing to Al Franken in the 2008 senatorial race. And because this race had national implications, Norm Coleman may want to consider expanding his apology to include the citizens of all these United States. Third, I demand that Madonna apologize to Kabbalah worshippers for joining their religion and thereby making a mockery of it.
Now that I have issued my apology demands, I would like to invite my fellow freepers to issue their own apology demands to people they don't know.
And lastly, because I don't want this post to end on a purely negative note, I would like to personally thank Mitchell Mortaza for founding the Women's Lingerie Football League. Mitchell, if you are reading this, I just want to say "Never Give Up! Never Surender!"
You need to apologize.
I didn’t understand any of that.
Except, of course, the creepy part. (I get that a lot.)
No matter where you go ... there you are.
Sorry...I was being sarcastic...especially about the creepy part.
Isn’t this the official apology thread?
No matter where you go ... you still have to wipe your butt afterward.
LOL! Yer funny. ;o)
In keeping with the fact that this is the official apology thread...
I’m sorry, but you’re creepy. lol
I demand an apology from the prophet mohammed for ruining pork futures in the Middle East and North Africa (and for a few beheadings)
Can anyone deny that Al Gore owes an apology to the nation for his multiple personalities? He is everything from a record label rating activist to a serial rapist to a ranting preaching of global doom to a jet-setter toon. Maybe he should just apologize for existing.
And, I demand the Founders of the nation apologize for starting a revolution over paying 3 pence additional to the 1 shilling 9 pence cost for a pound of tea. 3 pence out of 22 pence is a measley 14% rate. How dare they set such a bad example for a people with total tax rates above 50%. Tea Partiers beware: by today’s standards, the original Tea Partiers were OVERLY SENSITIVE!
LOL. Well, *that* requires NO apology!
"I dont know what i did !but im sorry too"
I apologize for still being awake to notice that you are still awake.
I think you owe me an apology for that.
I apologize profusely for waking up a 0400h and clicking on this thread.
Okay. I have one last apology before I head out. I apologize for shopping at the “non-union” Super WalMart which is open 24/7! Very convenient and such a beautiful, clean store with wide aisles and great prices. It's even surrounded by Mom & Pop franchisees (I hope that's a word...it's late here) along with a couple of independent Mom & Pop retailers, so everyone’s happy and business is good.
You betcha! I most certainly owe you an apology for *that.* It happens too often.
Thank you God for answering my prayers.
And just who is going to apologize for this.
My wife is both questioning the ability of this to exist and my reasons for thinking I will need it.
She is some what...skeptical...already. And its only 1642 on Sat. afternoon. I ain't had time to get into mischief yet.
Duly deleted. Now apologize! LOL.
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