Police investigate whether man's legs severed to fit in coffin

CNN Online ^ | 4/2/09 | Divina Mims

[Non-Sequitur]

Police in Allendale, South Carolina, are investigating whether a funeral home fit a 6-foot, 5-inch man into his coffin by severing his legs.

The wife of James Hines reportedly said the funeral home told her that her husband's coffin was long enough.

A former Cave Funeral Services employee has alleged since James Hines' death from skin cancer in 2004 that Hines was too tall for his coffin and that the funeral home took extreme measures to make him fit, Allendale County Coroner Hayzen Black told CNN.

[Non-Sequitur]

Ick.

[End Times Sentinel]

Wouldn't it have been easier to just fold his legs back? Or maybe cross them up indian style?

“How do you feel about the lotus position, Jimbo?”

[DTogo]

Not much else for the cops to do in Allendale?

[driftdiver]

Next thing ya know they’ll allow decomposition to set in.

[Vaquero]

that’s thinking with your dipstick, jimmy.

[a fool in paradise]

McCain is seeking a pardon for Jack Johnson (deceased boxer from the turn of the 19th/20th century).

There are Quixotic investigations while there is rampant Democrat corruption throughout our government institutions.

[a fool in paradise]

Not if he name was Lenin.

[Edgar3]

My hometown. How about that.

[Sax]

[seatrout]

—Police in Allendale, South Carolina, are investigating whether a funeral home fit a 6-foot, 5-inch man into his coffin by severing his legs. —

Didn’t they do SOMETHING like that with Milton Berle when he passed away? </jk>

[Dumpster Baby]

"If Jimmy fit you must acquit"

[KarlInOhio]

Don’t funeral homes usually just tell the grieving family that the coffin doesn’t fit and that they’ll need to cough up another couple thousand dollars for the extra long coffin for the body to rest comfortably?

[Joe 6-pack]

The funeral home’s public relations folks had best get quick a handle on these allegations...cut ‘em off at the knees, so to speak.

[swain_forkbeard]

Isn’t there a tasteless joke somewhere in there about a court case and a leg to stand on? Or being cut off at the knees? Or dead on arrival?

[IYAS9YAS]

I'm seriously thinking about stipulating in my will that my body be cremated and my ashes distributed into the ventilation systems of PETA, The Sierra Club, and The Brady Center...

I will then mail them a letter stating that every time they breath in through their mouths, they'll literally be kissing my ash.

[2 Kool 2 Be 4-Gotten]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Procrustes

[IYAS9YAS]

I will then mail them a letter

Hard to do once cremated.

How about: "I will also have a letter mailed to them..."

[reagan_fanatic]

Well, it’s not like he’s ever gonna use them again!

[cyclotic]

My father in law dies a few weeks ago. While chatting witht he funeral director, I asked him what they did for guys that were too tall. My exact words were “do you make him shorter?”

He told me they have to get oversized caskets and vaults.

[cyclotic]

dies=died