Posted on 07/25/2008 11:02:59 AM PDT by Areopagus
From Blazing Saddles (1974)
Taggart: I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots.
“No, I’M Dave!”
“How’m I driving?”
His writing does resemble the style of Justice Breyer's opinions.
Stick it to the perp LOL
From: Blazing Saddles
Hedley Lamarr: My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Is there a point to this post?
It was from one of the rant creator tools the troll used to create the original post and the response.
Leni
Sir—Thank YOU for your service and for “getting” my little ditty.
The left is an internal enemy as far as I’m concerned and I believe the poster is a leftist trying to be clever. I could be wrong because the post was not easy to follow and its readability was a strain. But I am pretty sure I’m right.
They are entrenched.
They are still liars though no matter how poetic they attempt to use the language.
OMG!!!! That’s TOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!
Here’s MINE!
My complaint about Mr. Barak H. Obama
I pride myself on my exactitude. As you’ll see from this letter, I provide copious detail and try to be as precise as possible when describing the ways in which Mr. Barak H. Obama has been a bad apple for as long as I can remember. Let me cut to the chase: Barak has never satisfactorily proved his assertion that truth is merely a social construct. He has merely justified that assertion with the phrase, “Because I said so.” I don’t want to overstate this point, but I can reword my point as follows. Barak has little respect for laws or for any behavior that most people would consider requisite for a sustainable information economy. What, then, does “electrophysiologically” mean? It means considerably more than any dictionary is likely to say.
Barak sees people like you and me as the perfect drones for his future globalist regime. In view of that, it is not surprising that I call upon Barak to stop his oppression, lies, immorality, and debauchery. I call upon him to be a man of manners, principles, honour, and purity. And finally, I call upon him to forgo his desire to carve out space in the mainstream for brown-nosing politics. The first response to this from his vicegerents is perhaps that parasitism is a be-all, end-all system that should be forcefully imposed upon us. Wrong. Just glance at the facts: There is no excuse for the innumerable errors of fact, the slovenly and philistine artistic judgments, the historical ineptitude, the internal contradictions, and the various half-truths, untruths, and gussied-up truths that litter every one of his essays from the first word to the last.
Barak has already begun turning spielers loose against us good citizens. I wish I were joking but I’m not. What’s more, just the other day, some of Barak’s beastly proxies forced a prospectus into my hands as I walked past. The prospectus described Barak’s blueprint for a world in which fascism-oriented pissants are free to transform our little community into a global crucible of terror and gore. As I dropped the prospectus onto an overflowing wastebasket I reflected upon the way that Barak’s cabal appears to be growing in number. I pray that this is analogous to the flare-up of a candle just before extinction yet I keep reminding myself that “Barak” has now become part of my vocabulary. Whenever I see someone feature simplistic answers to complex problems, I tell him or her to stop “Barak-ing”.
There is a format Barak should follow for his next literary endeavor. It involves a topic sentence and supporting facts. He might have been in a lethargic state of autointoxication when he said that he is the most recent incarnation of the Buddha. More likely, perhaps, is that someone just showed me a memo supposedly written by Barak. The memo spells out his plans to change the course of history. If this memo is authentic, it tells us that all Barak really wants is to hang onto the perks he’s getting from the system. That’s all he really cares about.
Those of us who are still sane, those of us who still have a firm grip on reality, those of us who still insist that it is important to realize that Barak is unable to remove his mental shackles, have an obligation to do more than just observe what Barak is doing from a safe distance. We have an obligation to promote peace, prosperity, and quality of life, both here and abroad. We have an obligation to examine the warp and woof of his ballyhoos. And we have an obligation to get my message about Barak out to the world. If it were true, as he claims, that he is entitled to generate alienation and withdrawal, then I wouldn’t be saying that if Barak is going to talk about higher standards then he needs to live by those higher standards. Even though he gives flattering titles to his natural distempers, he has been trying hard to protect what has become a lucrative racket for him. Unfortunately, that lucrative racket has a hard-to-overlook consequence: it will provoke terrible, total, universal, and merciless destruction any day now. I, hardheaded cynic that I am, would like to go on, but I do have to keep this letter short. So I’ll wrap it up by saying that Mr. Barak H. Obama’s squibs serve no purpose other than to play the blame game.
(Mind you now, I could have written that without the aid of a computer or for that matter, without the aid of the internet and actually used a pen, pencil and paper... but it wouldn’t have been as fast!)
The sad part is, I see posts like this all over the internet and from trolls here.
Oh Thank-g-d I thought I might be the only one who didn’t get what he/she was saying!
Hmmm. That’s strange. Your rant makes perfect sense while Aeroflot’s rant is pure gibberish. The rant generator must be able to electromagnetically draw directly from the user’s intellectual capacities.
“Golldarnit, Mr. Lamarr. You use your tongue purtier’n a $20 whore.”
Welcome to Free Republic!
You might want to look up the word prolix.
Another good word is succinct.
You might want to adjust your writing to conform with the spirit of the later word rather than the former one.
STE=Q
In before the well-deserved ZOT
Your message board incompetence is an inspiration to botched lobotomy patients everywhere. Your post is an orgy of stultifying cacophonous verbal depravity; an exercise in literary impotence, and an offense to all of good taste and decency.
I don’t know what makes you such a worthless poster, but it really works! Clearly, the full area of your ignorance is not yet mapped. We are presently only exploring the fringes of that vast expanse. You’ve got a big hole in your head, now shut it. When you are at a loss for words, your loss is our gain. How true is Stanislaw J. Lec’s famous remark: “Every now and then you meet someone whose ignorance is encyclopedic.”
You are a bore, and a very dull one at that. Looking at you, Darwin would NOT be pleased to see how inefficiently evolution sometimes works. Maybe you wouldn’t be such a Jerk-In-The-Box if that pimple on your ass hadn’t turned out to be a brain tumor; if your weren’t so fat that buildings bounce when you haul your Sumo Wrestler mass down the street, or if you didn’t have a face that people rub tree branches on to make ugly sticks. Nah, of course you would.
English is your second language, isn’t it? You don’t have a first. Clearly, you spend way too much time in darkened rooms in front of your seven-year-old computer turning a whiter shade of pale. Go outside once in a while and breathe, before your brain starts to rot from all that festering stagnation and cognitive dysfunction.
I notice that you never let an idea interrupt the flow of your posts. Wouldn’t clues have more room to fit in your head if you got rid of some of the gobbledygook in there? A long period of non-posting would be most welcome on your part. As Abba Eban so aptly said: “His ignorance is encyclopedic.”
You are about as entertaining as watching grass grow in a windowbox. What do you do for a living? You are living, aren’t you? Why don’t you close your mouth before someone sticks an apple in it? Maybe you wouldn’t be such a Jerk-In-The-Box if your brain cells weren’t on the Endangered Species list; if your weren’t so fat that when you stand on the Speaking Scale, it screams, or if you didn’t have a face like a boiled Octopus. Nah, of course you would.
In future, if you have something to say, just shut up. Sorry, I don’t speak retardese. Can you get someone to translate into meaningful English before you post, please? I suggest you hone your writing skills before applying borrowed glories as a mere typist.
If your brain matter was axle grease, there wouldn’t be enough in your head to grease the dynamo on a lightening bug’s ass. Are you always this ignorant, or are you making a special effort today? However, I’ll consider letting you have the last word if you guarantee it will be your last. As Ellen Glasgow once remarked: “He knows so little and knows it so fluently.”
You are about as entertaining as a child’s inflatable punching toy. You bop it, it springs back, you bop it again and you forget it ever existed. It slowly deflates in an unused corner, then one day you throw it away. You are like watching Amputee Field Hockey: pathetic, and very quickly disgusting. Maybe you wouldn’t come across as such a jellyfish-sucking mental midget if you weren’t so dense that light bends around you; if your weren’t so fat that you look like The Michelin Man man on steroids, or if you didn’t have a face so ugly that your Psychiatrist makes you lie face down. No, come to think of it, you would.
I figured that it would be a major waste of time to craft an intelligible, coherent, literate response to your inane rantings, so instead of wasting my time, I just went to the insult generator, instead. I could copy’n’paste more from the insult generator, but it would still be a waste of time, just as trying read your stoopid, leftard drivel was. You are a prime example of what people mean when they say “educated idiot”. No matter how much education, you will still be a clueless idiot.
“Intelligence is distributed on the bell curve. At any point in time, 50% of the people walking past you are idiots.” —Gallagher
You, sir, haven’t even attempted to start the climb of the left hand side of the curve.
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