Posted on 07/21/2008 8:48:56 AM PDT by LOC1
Further to his 100% hydrocarbon free electricity generation proposal, Al Gore has proposed a new government program, "Fart Recycling."
Methane gas in the atmosphere has increased 150% since the mid 1700's. (During the same time period, Carbon dioxide increased only 30%.) Methane gas has more than 25 times the greenhouse gas impact per gram as compared to carbon dioxide. As many know, flatulence, "farts," are almost entirely methane gas.
Therefore, Al Gore has developed a new program to combat this obviously increasing peril to our planet, and make a little money for himself at the same time.
Everyone will be required to wear a "fart meter," (Cost $75, available only from Al Gore) which will record and automatically transmit to a new government agency ( the Federal Automatic Recording Technology Department) the occasion of each fart and the volume thereof.
For an additional fee of $4,500, interested parties can purchase a fart capture mechanism (avaiable only from Al Gore). This 25 pound device can be conveniently worn under the special clothing available also from Al Gore in attractive shades of brown.
When full, the intrested consumer can present his fart capture device to Al Gore's recycling center, where for a fee of $0.10 per fart, the captured farts will be recycled into the US natural gas distribution system. Al Gore also will receive a modest fee of only $0.015 per fart for the energy content of the gas.
The interested consumer will also receive "fart credits" for the number of farts he recycles. These "fart credits" can be traded to other consumers, who elected not to purchase a fart capture mechanism, through Al Gore's Fart Trading Exchange. Al Gore will extract only a small commission of $0.01 per fart for each trade.
All Consumers will be required to be "fart neutral" by a "Cap and Trade" regulation, administered by the new Federal Automatice Recording Technology Department. Legislation is being developed as we speak, by the concerned Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, and her earstwhile compatriot in the Senate, Harry Reid.
Get ahead of the mandated stampede to control this growing threat to our planet. Get you fart capture mechanism now. Simply contact Al Gore and follow his instructions.
Let’s fart our way to Planet Gore!
No way of knowing I suppose..
A free renewable source of energy with a never ending supply! :)
Gore Says Climate Crisis Worse Than Terrorism
Former Vice President Al Gore (D) offered the opinion that global warming, not terrorism, is the biggest threat to America. The former VP said that it is imperative that the nation go “green” before it is too late.
“Terrorists may kill thousands,” Gore said. “Warming will kill billions and destroy civilization. If the government doesn’t take immediate action, the survival of the United States as we know it is at risk.”
Step one of Gore’s proposed plan of action calls for the federal government to establish a “carbon-offsets” reserve. The reserve, modeled on the “Strategic Petroleum Reserve,” would have the government purchase carbon-offset certificates from Generation Investment Management, a London-based company with offices in Washington, D.C., and store them in underground vaults for later use.
The former VP dismissed critics’ complaints that the plan is “self-serving” (Gore is the chairman of Generation Investment Management). “This is no time for finger pointing or arguing about the cost,” Gore insisted. “The American people must make sacrifices if I am to save the nation and the planet.”
Senator Obama praised Gore’s “vision,” promising to name him “Environmental Czar” and incorporate his proposal into a comprehensive energy/environmental plan once he is elected president.
read more
http://www.azconservative.org/Semmens1.htm
A 1200 lb cow produces 100-200 liters of methane a day, I wonder how much a dinosaur that weighed in at 130 - 150 tons produced?
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