1 posted on
03/10/2008 8:05:43 PM PDT by
South40
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To: South40
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
2 posted on
03/10/2008 8:09:10 PM PDT by
Perdogg
(Reagan would have never said "She's my girl")
To: South40
Did you know that Monsters check under their beds to make sure Chuck Norris isn't under it before they go to sleep?
3 posted on
03/10/2008 8:09:41 PM PDT by
txroadkill
(Liberals believe that the only oppressed people in Cuba are the terrorist in GitMo)
To: South40
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer.
Chuck Norris is always in control
4 posted on
03/10/2008 8:09:57 PM PDT by
mountn man
(The pleasure you get from life, is equal to the attitude you put into it.)
To: South40
Actually, Chuck Norris has been dead for the last ten years. It’s just that Death is still scared to come get him.
7 posted on
03/10/2008 8:14:10 PM PDT by
RichInOC
(...William Frank Buckley, Jr., November 24, 1925-February 27, 2008, R.I.P.)
To: South40
Chuck Norris stared down age. He is now 45.
10 posted on
03/10/2008 8:19:29 PM PDT by
irishtenor
(Check out my blog at http://boompa53.blogspot.com/)
To: South40
He looks like he’s in his 40’s to me.
11 posted on
03/10/2008 8:21:18 PM PDT by
Xenophon450
(I guess I'll never know, some things under the sun can never be understood...)
To: South40
“our nation’s greatest hero” ? For doing what? Selling Total Gyms? Supporting loser ex-Governors of Arkansas?
Who writes this dreck?
12 posted on
03/10/2008 8:22:08 PM PDT by
exit82
(People get the government they deserve. And they are about to get it--in spades.)
To: South40
My hero. He used to own a house just down the road from me, but I never got a glimpse of him.....too bad.
To: LongElegantLegs
14 posted on
03/10/2008 8:24:53 PM PDT by
r-q-tek86
(If you're not taking flak, you're not over the target.)
To: South40
Chuck Norris uses the total gym in order to give IT a real workout.
That nice juicy steak is what results when Chuck Norris tickles a raging bull.
Chuck Norris’ saliva is sold and marketed as “Jack Daniels”
16 posted on
03/10/2008 8:32:24 PM PDT by
ari-freedom
(McCain must pick a conservative VP if he wants conservative support)
To: South40
Every time Chuck celebrates a birthday, the rest of the world fears their death day
18 posted on
03/10/2008 8:33:40 PM PDT by
ari-freedom
(McCain must pick a conservative VP if he wants conservative support)
To: South40
To: South40
Chuck Norris was making love to a super model on a tractor. A drop of his semen landed on the tractor. The result was Optimus Prime.
22 posted on
03/10/2008 8:34:21 PM PDT by
Sergio
(If a tree fell on a mime in the forest, would he make a sound?)
To: South40
The only reason you’re conscious is that Chuck Norris doesn’t feel like carrying you.
23 posted on
03/10/2008 8:35:17 PM PDT by
John Jorsett
(scam never sleeps)
To: South40
68 is the new 48.
With Chuck Norris —— make that 38!
27 posted on
03/10/2008 8:37:50 PM PDT by
Exit148
(Founder of the Loose Change Club. Every nickle and dime counts!!)
To: South40
Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.
To: South40
Norris is pre-clinical-demential. Poor guy. He really screwed the pooch on the schmuckabee thing. Hate to see a hero evaporate into a drooling vegetable.
To: South40
To: South40
Chuck Norris doesn’t mow his lawn. He stares at the grass and dares it to grow.
If you google the words “Chuck Norris sucks”, the only result you will get are the words, “Run while you still can”.
36 posted on
03/10/2008 9:19:11 PM PDT by
lowbridge
("I can't wait to see what he stands for." - Susan Sarandon on her support of Barack Obama)
To: South40
Chuck Norris has been dead for years. Death is too scared sh*tless to come and make his claim.
38 posted on
03/10/2008 9:25:08 PM PDT by
FormerACLUmember
(When the past no longer illuminates the future, the spirit walks in darkness.)
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