Posted on 02/06/2008 8:15:09 PM PST by neverdem
If there is such a person as a “baby whisperer,” it is the pediatrician Dr. Harvey Karp, whose uncanny ability to quiet crying babies became the best-selling book “The Happiest Baby on the Block.”
Dr. Karp’s method, endorsed by child advocates and demonstrated in television appearances and a DVD version of his book, shows fussy babies who are quickly, almost eerily soothed by a combination of tight swaddling, loud shushing and swinging, which he says mimics the sensations of the womb.
Now Dr. Karp, assistant professor of pediatrics at the University of California, Los Angeles, has turned his attention to the toddler years...
--snip--
For instance, a toddler throwing a tantrum over a cookie might wail, “I want it. I want it. I want cookie now.”
Often, a parent will adopt a soothing tone saying, “No, honey, you have to wait until after dinner for a cookie.”
Such a response will, almost certainly, make matters worse. “It’s loving, logical and reasonable,” notes Dr. Karp. “And it’s infuriating to a toddler. Now they have to say it over harder and louder to get you to understand.”
Dr. Karp adopts a soothing, childlike voice to demonstrate how to respond to the toddler’s cookie demands.
“You want. You want. You want cookie. You say, ‘Cookie, now. Cookie now.’ ”
It’s hard to imagine an adult talking like this in a public place. But Dr. Karp notes that this same form of “active listening” is a method adults use all the time. The goal is not simply to repeat words but to make it clear that you hear someone’s complaint. “If you were upset and fuming mad, I might say, ‘I know. I know. I know. I get it. I’m really really sorry. I’m sorry.’ That sounds like gibberish out of context,” he says.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
ok then
The little Neanderthals have their own videos now:
I wonder if that would work to quiet liberals.
Actually I used a variation of this technique years ago when my kids were little.
It worked for me. Admittedly, some people thought I was nuts but what the heck....
It usually worked.
Utter Bull!
If you don't say "NO COOKIE" child has achieved control, and then child does not learn discipline, and child grows up to be a liberal socialist instead of a conservative.
YOU NO WANT COOKIE NOW!
I never had a problem using a firm voice, looking them in the eye and saying, "I know you want a cookie, but you cannot have one right now. No cookies before dinner."
But swaddling totally rocks!
OK kid, you want cookie, I want cookie.
Children are clever savages who are inherently expert at analyzing and exploiting the weakness of adults for their own perceived advantages. They are also possessed of the belief that what they want is the most important thing in the universe because they are the most important person of their universe. The purpose of parenting is to civilize them, to demonstrate to them that they are not the center of the universe and that the sooner they learn that they have to take others into account as having competing and ofttimes more valid claims, the better off they will be.
“The thing about toddlers is that they are uncivilized,” Dr. Karp says. “Our job is to civilize them, to teach them to say please and thank you, don’t spit and scratch and don’t pee anywhere you want. These are the jobs you have with a toddler.”
You sound like Dr. Karp.
Well, in this matter he is completely correct.
Dr. Karp’s ideas sound a little, well, never mind...
Gently whirling a newborn in a blanket used to be used to regularize irregular heartbeat.
I agree. I noticed my chilren could understand what was being said long, long, before they could speak, and a lot of their tantrums were annoyance and frustration over the fact that they could not express themselves well enough to be understood.
Really?
Then...can Popeye visualize whirled SweePeas?
Absolutely does.
Used to be the norm. I raised five and how I remember the 'receiving blankets' - put the baby in diagonally, fold up the bottom triangular edge, then bring in each of the sides, snuggly.
The well-wrapped little ones loved it. They felt safe because their movements were semi-restricted, like they were used to...there was a 'wall' of safety around them.
Ever see a new born without anything around them - push out their arms or legs and when they encounter nothing but air, they panic...they start to cry and shake.
"You want, you want trillions of dollars for worthless social programs". Somehow I can't see that kind of talk working on liberals. They'd only throw a bigger tantrum.
LOL!!! You may be on to something!
But did you give in and provide the cookie or did you just get the kid to better express his desire and then still deny it?
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