Posted on 11/26/2007 10:26:35 AM PST by Responsibility2nd
No, I think femi-nazism is mostly a meaningless buzzword used by weak and bitter men. I think a lot of people make dumb decisions in who they marry, in why they divorce, and in how they behave in divorce, but it's none of my business when they do. Adults making their own decisions in life, even decisions I wouldn't make, is just one of those side-effects of ~freedom~.
Divorce is a sacred institution between a man and a woman. The state should have as little to do with it as possible. The fact that you need a license to get married gives the state too much say already. Individuals shouldn’t have to justify themselves to the state regarding their marriage.
One potential problem: the no-fault rule was made so that folks could escape bad marriages. Applying this new idea would mean that, in such instances, the mistreated spouse have to choose between leaving his or her kids in the hands of an abuser, or staying in that bad situation for the children’s sake (thus robbing the no-fault rule of the sole decent benefit that it was written to provide).
Uh oh...the HTT’s will get ya for that...
You are wrong there. Kids who live with two fighting parents forced to stay together will be so emotionally scarred that they will probably NEVER marry....if they do not commit suicide that is.
Too bad!!
I’m not scared.
Well my eleven year old certainly wouldn’t have had a problem with it.
While I sympathize for the plight you have found yourself in and have no use for such women that have done to you what you describe, I can not let this particular statement stand without comment.
I am thankful there were no children involved in my first marriage, yet the ex tried everything in his arsenal to make me pay when I said no more and walked on him. I'm sorry, but men can be just as vindictive as women. Not only did he seek spousal support from me, he sought over $1,000 in legal expenses. I chose the no fault option as much to save him community humiliation as to save myself from it
Nearly 20 years later, with a strong marriage and a 9 year old child I can look back on it as comedy/tragedy, but at 27 it was far from comedic to me at the time. It was a devestating and demoralizing experience.
Thank you.
Femi-nazism may be a meaningless buzz word for you.
But no fault divorce is no buzz word. It’s a real serious social evil that is ripping apart the moral fabric of America.
I guess I’m just suprized that you and other FReepers (Hello JRBC) are in favor of NFD.
People tend to forget that the best thing a kid benefits from seeing is the healthy, loving interaction of two parents.
However, if the interaction isn’t loving or healthy, the jury’s out on whether or not that is better than divorce.
Moral Absolute ping.
I’m naive. I woulda thought that ending No Fault Divorce was a moral absolute that all FReepers would agree with.
Clearly I’m wrong. There seem to be plenty who think divorce should be easy come-easy go.
And to hell with the children.
I’m not ‘in favor’ of NFD. I don’t plan on doing it. But I don’t meddle in the personal affairs of other adults, unless they ask me.
You can't force them to stay together, just to stay legally married. My great grandfather abandoned his wife and children in the 1930's, but technically they were never legally divorced. The effects on my grandmother was still the same.
But no fault divorce is no buzz word. It’s a real serious social evil that is ripping apart the moral fabric of America.
I hear this a lot, but I just don't buy it.
It isn't exactly a breeze to get a divorce in New York State, and yet that doesn't stop a lot of people.
Of course, men can be just as bad. I guess the difference is that I’ve never been married to one. The central idea of the original post seemed to be that “no-fault” is not a problem in a case like yours was with no kids involved. I’m happy for you that your life has so greatly improved.
While NFD itself I have mixed feelings on, I also don’t believe that a person should be forced to stay in a marriage where they are continually abused, either by action, or INACTION (being ignored, unloved, etc) or cheated on.
ping
Because there are many situations where such an alternative is far superior than dragging dirty laundry out into public.
Concern for the children is foremost in my mind. Why should the children be subjected to more crapola that arises when abuse or adultery are the reason for the divorce. Do you think dragging those children into a courtroom to provide witness/testimony against one or the other parent is a good thing for them?
I have seen marriages end in divorce with children involved where the no-fault was a far superior wasy to go than the attempt of proving the abuse -- as there are other forms of abuse than just physical. I've also seen mariages continue that should not have because of the lack of no-fault divorce at the time.
I am against forcing people to stay together when they are miserable.
NFD may have its problems.....but not having it has problems too.
Yeah, they'll be much happier after being raped by Mommy's new boyfriend.
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