Vanity, We've all decided; You're not allowed to Smoke!

Less than a month ago, Congress planned to ram through a tobacco tax that would have all but killed the cigar industry. The outrageousness of the tax they intended to levee on tobacco products was intended to be crippling. Cigarettes as well, were to sustain a .50 to $1.50 per pack increase. Ostensibly, this tax was to fund a health care package for children. The link between socialized health care for kids and tobacco smokers has not yet been made clear, not so for the intentions of Congress.

Recently, rumor has it that Mike Huckabee who has billed himself as the great hope of the Christians or Evangelicals or Right wing nuts or whatever label the press has assigned them this week, has publicly called for a ban on smoking in all public areas. While the merits of tobacco smoking are completely arguable, the term “freedom” is not nearly so nebulas.

While the Democratic Congress has made no secret of their intent to loose the war in Iraq, support the candidacy of Hillary Clinton and explode the concept or religion of global warming as an immediate threat, they have not been nearly as accountable for doing their jobs. So far, they have passed several non-binding resolutions regarding Iraq, surpassed prediction of the wildest, most obscene package of earmarks of any Congress etc. The problem is that, to date, they have yet to deliver the budget items to the President or secure the peoples business. It seems that anything beyond their pale of responsibility is plausible yet those things for which they are responsible are left to languish and take second place to party politics. Now, Congress seems to have focused their attention on smokers.

After re-reading the Constitution, there were no hidden clauses or sub-texts found that allude to Congress taking a position, one way or the other, regarding smoking. Since smokers have not united and claimed victim or minority status, the individuals who do smoke are simply individuals and as such, subject to Congressional steamrolling. Today, smokers are feeling the hot, foul and corrupt breath of Congress as it breaths down the back of their necks. Who will feel it tomorrow? There is a very unhealthy trend here. The unhealthiness of it is far more lethal than any tobacco product could ever be.

At some point the American people are going to either be content to be spoon fed by the government or reclaim their God given rights to their heritage. Certainly, the freedom to smoke should not be a contentious issue. The concept of the typical American who chooses to indulge in tobacco products, having to bow to economic pressure inflicted on them by their own government, is diametrically opposed to the concept of freedom. We should not forget the price hike of the mid 90’s where the price of cigarettes doubled. Who won the proceeds of that event? The attorneys who brought the suit! Those dollars were billed as going to some worthwhile charity at that time as well. Congress is supposed to be responsible TO THE PEOPLE, not the other way around! A choice needs to be made. With the technological advances being made today in personal surveillance and personal information retrieval, a line must be drawn somewhere before American’s become robotic extensions of Congressional will.

The Country’s In The Very Best Of Hands
by
Johnny Mercer

them city folks and friends
are pretty much alike
though they ain’t used to living in the sticks
we don’t like stone or cement
but we is in agreement
when we get started talking politics

the country’s in the very best of hands
the best of hands
the best of hands

the treasury says the national debt
is climbing to the sky
and government expenditures
have never been so high
it makes a fellow get a
gleam of pride when they decide
to see how our economy expands
the country’s in the very best of hands

the country’s in the very best of hands
the best of hands
the best of hands

you oughtta hear the senate
when their drawing up a bill
where asses and dimwits are crowded in each conisil (sp.)
such legal terminology
would give your heart a thrill
there’s phrases there that no one understands
the country’s in the very best of hands

the building boom, they say
is getting bigger every day
and when i asked a feller
how could everybody pay
he come up with an answer
that made everything okay
supplies are getting greater than demands
the country’s in the very best of hands

don’t you believe them congressmen
and senators are dumb
when they run into problems
that is tough to overcome
they just declare something
they call the moritorium
the upper and the lower house dismans
the country’s in the very best of hands

fox motors is connected to the nominee
the nominee’s connected to the treasury
when he ain’t connected to the treasury
he sits around on his thigh bone

he sits around in his fancy car
this big congressional parking lot
just sits around on the you know what
‘cause there they calls it their thigh bone

them bones, them bones
gonna rise again
gonna excercise a franchise again
gonna tax us up to our eyes again
when he gets them off of their thigh bone

the country’s in the very best of hands
the best of hands
the best of hands

the farm bill should be
eight-nine percent paroty
and all their fellow recommends
it should be mound at three
but eighty, ninety-five percent who cares about decree
it’s paroty that no one understands
the county’s in the very best of hands

them gop’s and democrats
each hates the other one
they’s always criticizing
how the country should be run
but neither tell the public
what the others gone and done
as long as no one knows
where no one stands
the country’s in the very best of hands

they sits around and just place their ass
where folks in congress has always sat
just sits around on their excess bag
up there they calls it their thigh bone

they sits around till they starts to snore
jumps up and hollers
i has the floor
then sits right down where they sats before
up there they calls it their thigh bone

them bones, them bones
gonna cross again
so dignified and so wise again
while the budget doubles in size again
when it gets them off of their thigh bone

the country’s in the very best of hands
the best of hands
the best of hands

the money that they taxes us
that’s known as revenues
they compound up collaterals
subtracts the residue

don’t worry about the principal
and interest it encrues
they’re shipping all that stuff to foreign lands
the country’s in the very best of hands

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