Posted on 06/25/2007 11:25:30 AM PDT by swarthyguy
Al Qaeda in Iraq (AQI) had tarnished its name here by publicly attacking and murdering children, videotaping beheadings, all while imposing harsh punishments on Iraqi civilians found guilty of violating morality laws prohibiting activities like smoking. The AQI installed Sharia court had sanctioned the amputation of the two “smoking fingers” for those who violated anti-smoking laws. In part because local sentiment was shifting against it, AQI synthesized with other groups and undertook an image makeover, christening itself “The Islamic State of Iraq.” But the new name was just lipstick on a pig here.
On the evening of the 24th I spoke with a local Iraqi official, Colonel Faik, who said the Muftis would order the severance of the two fingers used to hold a cigarette for any Iraqis caught smoking. Other reports, from here in Diyala and also in Anbar, allege that smokers are murdered by AQI. Most Iraqis smoke and this particular prohibition appeared to have earned the ire of many locals. After an American unit cleared an apartment complex on the 23rd, LTC Smiley, the battalion commander, reported that residents didn’t ask for food and water, but cigarettes. In other parts of Baqubah, people have been celebrating the routing of AQI by lighting up and smoking cigarettes.
Other AQI edicts included beatings for men who refused to grow beards, and corporal punishments for obscene sexual suggestiveness, defined by such “loose” behavior as carrying tomatoes and cucumbers in the same bag. These fatwas were not eagerly embraced by most Iraqis, and the taint traveled back to the Muftis who sat in supreme judgment. Locals, who are increasingly helpful in pointing out and celebrating the downfall of AQI here, said that during the initial Arrowhead Ripper attack the morning of the 19th, AQI murdered five men. Townsend’s men found the buried corpses behind an AQI prison, exactly where they’d been told to look for the group grave. Locals also directed Townsend’s men to a torture house. Peering through a window, American soldiers saw knives, swords, bindings and drills. AQI is well-known for its macabre eagerness to drill into kneecaps, elbows, ribs, skulls, and other parts of victims.
One local Mufti who was said to have always worn a hood and sunglasses—and to have somehow disguised his voice—was pointed out to the Iraqi Army this weekend, who promptly captured him. Iraqi officials said today that although they did not previously know that this man was a Mufti, his name had been on their target list. The Mufti is being questioned and his name has not been released.
I walk within a few feet of generators all the time with a lit cigarette...right past big signs that say "No Smoking Within 50 Feet." Heck, everyone does it.
Tomorrow, I'm really going to tempt fate and carry some cucumbers and tomatoes out of the chow hall... in the same bag.
You are carrying the sarcasm a little far.
It would NOT be effective in promoting a smoke free america, the gunsmoke would be a LOT thicker than any cigarette smoke you would EVER be subjected too, experimental rats included.
>>Jasone and rose prtals are a damned sight sexier than cucumbers or tomotoes.
You getting turned on? You’re misspelling passionately.
You’re no jihadi hottie, whadda you have against sexy vegetables? Ever check out those knobbly English cucumbers?
Oddly enough, I was on a site selling some of the more traditional Arab dress - including a model in a burqa who HAD to be a man, strying to stand hipshot and err...sexy, while leaning against a building.
A smoker. WITH a window open.
We've suspected for years that the PC crowd was getting it's ideas from the Wahhabi Lobby.
>>the gunsmoke would be a LOT thicker
- secondhand gunsmoke.
I’m calling Pelosi.
It won't be long. There is already a strong lobby advocating killing the "useless eaters"
You should hear my cure for manmade global warming. Good thing, otherwise that impending ice age we kept hearing about in the 70’s would have frozen us out by now.
It’ll help rejuvenate the fishing stocks too.
Rent a boat; get naked, stand on the edge and blow your brains out ensuring you fall into the ocean.
Chum. It’s what’s for dinner.
No wood for coffins, no energy or wood costs for cremation. Carbon offset ratio excellent, apart from gas for boat and bullet casing.
If the male AQs find cucumbers to be unbearably erotic, just imagine how they’d react to a nice, big stick of summer sausage.
I sure did butcher that sentence. I must need some more caffeine. What the heck, it’s early yet...
Did I ever tell you that as an artist I have an extremely vivid imagination? OUCH!
AH, but THAT would upset the chemical balance and make the water too rich, resulting in an explosion of plankton which would cause mass die offs of cetaceans...not to mention the possibilities for killing off all marine life with our exotic diseases...it would result on catastrophe! !! err....!!!!!
They check their feces for lumps with their unclean hand!
That’s taking virgin birth to new(genetically modified) heights. In fact, putting wombs in men has been set forth as something viable in the near future by some UK scientists, IIRC.
As for nature, I believe only the sea horse male is capable of pregnancy.
At first I was wanting to try whatever they were smoking but then I realized that smoking started all this.
Magic brownies maybe?
I've heard that it can make you psychotic. If so that'd explain a lot about these fellas.
Sitting here in the office thinking of those lucky Irakis liberated and free to smoke over there.....
So I’m bumping myself. Hope I don’t go blind.
I’m the wrong gender, but I hear that making sure you don’t share lotion and only using a well trusted brand can minimize vision problems. Or hairy palms...or something. I forget now.
Oh man, that’s funny! Well deserved swift kick.
“How bout this, you ignorant sh1t, some of our soldiers happen to be scumbag smokers themselves!”
I'm not one of THEM. I will fight for personal freedom and for that of others.
You'd be surprised how poorly I fit into the PC croud.
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