Psst, psst, its Pluto.
Hillary is, at this moment, discussing plans to send a tax bill to this planet via rocket.
Keep an eye on it for evidence of global warming.
New babies to adopt!
Ah, now I see a use for the detainees at Gitmo. Drop ‘em off there, see if they live.
Let’s strip mine it and really piss off the libs.
All enviromentalists and liberals please line up at Gate #1 for your flight to Eden.
Any lakefront property available?
We could be simply looking at ourselves through time.
Can we send Rosie O’Fruitcake right now?
Udry and colleagues discovered the planet using the European Southern Observatory's 3.6-metre telescope in Chile. They monitored a small, dim "red dwarf" star called Gliese 581, which lies 20.5 light years away, and is already known to have a Neptune-class planet.
I bet Richard Branson is already selling tickets to see the Fabulous Reverse Brothers...
There are a lot of ifs here: the only thing they know is its approximate mass, and approximate orbital distance. That said, the odds do favor it being rocky and it probably has an atmosphere. Another article I read earlier today notes that if it does have an atmosphere the surface temperature could easily be much hotter. It’s also quite likely that the planet has been despun, and the same side is always facing its star. But it has a chance of liquid water, and therefore life. And that makes it a milestone discovery, regardless of all the unsureities.
So I can expect to live to around the ripe old age of 2,106.
Someone had to say it.
It’s planet P4C 970, DON’T GO THERE.
1909 – Meeting of The Carnegie Endowment for International Peace, quoted from the minutes of the meeting. “The trustees of the Foundation brought up a single question. If it is desirable to alter the life of a single people, is there any means more efficient than war…. They discussed this question…… for a year and came up with an answer: There are no known means more efficient than war, assuming the objective is altering the life of an entire people. That leads them to a question: How do we involve the United States in a war?
[Written by former U.S. Congressman Norman Dodd, testified that he was invited to study the minutes of the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace: Report from Iron Mountain, New York, Dell Pub., 1967].
Iron Mountain Report (1967), layed out the strategy to control people in addition to provoking wars, listed the following:
The report was not intended for public release but one of the members felt that it was too important to conceal and released a copy to Dial Press, which published it in 1967.
The report’s basic conclusion was that lasting peace was probably unattainable and even if it could be achieved, it would not be in the best interests of a stable society to achieve it.
This 108-page report is mind-boggling, Among its startling recommendations are the following:
Create environmental hoaxes to keep people worried about ecology.
Spend massive sums on space exploration programs.
Spend massive sums on arms-control inspection programs.
Create UFO scares of invasions by extraterrestrial enemies.
Encourage ``blood games’’ for ``social purification’’.
Please note that all of these recommendations have been implemented, which tends to confirm the authenticity of the report.”
All and more are in effect...............................
The following are word for word as substitutes for war. Note, rest assured that the claims by the government and author that the report was a hoax, is not considered true by many. If it were a hoax, then why are all of the recommendations in full effect and then “some”....
Substitutes for the Functions of War: Models
The following substitute institutions, among others, have been proposed for consideration as replacements for the nonmilitary functions of war. That they may not have been originally set forth for that purpose does not preclude or invalidate their possible application here.
1. Economic. a) A comprehensive social-welfare program, directed toward maximum improvement of general conditions of human life. b) A giant open-end space research program, aimed at unreachable targets. c) A permanent, ritualized, ultra-elaborate disarmament inspection system, and variants of such a system.
2. Political. a) An omnipresent, virtually omnipotent international police force. b) An established and recognized extraterrestrial menace. c) Massive global environmental pollution. d) Fictitious alternate enemies.
3. Sociological: Control function. a) Programs generally derived from the Peace Corps model. b) A modern, sophisticated form of slavery. Motivational function. a) Intensified environmental pollution. b) New religious or other mythologies. c) Socially oriented blood games. d) Combination forms.
4. Ecological. A comprehensive program of applied eugenics.
5. Cultural. No replacement institution offered. Scientific. The secondary requirements of the space research, social welfare, and/or eugenics programs.
Wagons Ho!
Just so you all know, the planet is mine. I plan on selling it on Ebay.