Posted on 12/23/2006 5:15:33 PM PST by Dallas59
BANGKOK (AFP) - "I could not find anybody in the States. There was nothing in America for me. That's why I'm here," says the clean-cut 52-year-old bachelor, who bears a passing resemblance to Hollywood actor Michael Douglas.
Sullivan, an emergency nurse from Florida, is one of a growing number of foreign men seeking young and beautiful Thai brides via the Internet.
Speaking at the Bangkok office of Sweet Singles, a Thai bride-by-Internet company, Sullivan says he has decided to "go beyond boundaries" in his search for a wife after a futile quest in the United States.
"American women in my age are, basically, a wreck. They are physically and emotionally beaten up from relationships and life. They are untrusting," says the well-built Sullivan, sporting a pink shirt and white pants.
"I think the feminist movement in America in the 60s really trashed American feminism. American women lack a certain femininity about them that women of other countries have," he laughs.
Sullivan contacted Sweet Singles six months ago and was introduced to Yoshita Tongsalee, an attractive 27-year-old teacher of traditional Thai dancing.
After corresponding with her via e-mails for three weeks, Sullivan decided to meet her and flew to Bangkok in early December.
"Just from e-mails, I knew she was the one. I just knew," says the American, his emerald earring dazzling.
"I find Thai women in general to be less self-centered and more family-centered than I find in western women," he says. The couple plans to marry next year.
John, a 43-year-old Briton who got married to a Thai woman four years ago via an Internet bride agency, also has grievances about western women.
"English women are very demanding and they expect you to be good-looking and have plenty of money and give them lots of attention. They drink a lot and they smoke a lot and they eat a lot," says John, who declined to give his last name.
"I am not very good at getting women anyway. I'm not the best-looking guy in the world. I'm quite short and it's very hard for me to find an English woman who is shorter than me," he says on the telephone from London.
Before marrying his Thai bride, John dated six British women, but his relationships with them were anything but happy.
"I'm just fed up with British women. They are not so loyal," he says.
When he met six Thai ladies in Bangkok via the Internet, including a 32-year-old business woman who later became his wife, John says he was struck by their kindness and family-centered values.
"I think Thai women are more loyal to their husbands. They are not just 'take, take take.' Also they have old-fashioned family values, which we used to have in this country," he says. John and his wife now have two young boys.
John and Marc declined to say how much they paid to get their Thai wives. Sweet Singles says it can charge a foreign man up to 1,700 dollars for a three-year membership to meet Thai ladies.
Some 10,000 foreign men have signed up with Sweet Singles over the last decade, and nearly half of them were previously divorced, says Bee, the company's customer service manager.
Some 80 percent of them get married to Thai women through the agency.
Americans account for 60 percent of the company's male clients, with the rest mostly from Australia, Britain, Germany and Scandinavian countries. Their average age ranges from 55 to 60.
Some 20,000 Thai women have also joined Sweet Singles, with their ages ranging from 20 to 40. The company charges a Thai woman 700 baht (20 dollars) for membership.
Bee, a petite 40-something, says Thai woman often have a favorable impression of foreigners.
"Many Thai girls were disappointed by Thai men who are famous for womanizing, drinking and gambling. Thai woman believe Caucasian men are more responsible and sincere and not playing around with other women," she says.
Thanitchaya Buaban, a striking 26-year-old beauty from Thailand's northern tourist spot of Chiang Mai, says she used to have a Thai boyfriend but he cheated on her many times.
"I was heart-broken. After I joined Sweet Singles, I started meeting foreigners and they were very kind and polite," she says at the firm's office.
Thanitchaya says she now has many American suitors who are trying to win her love with diamond rings and necklaces.
"I'm going to choose the best one," she says with a big smile.
For Sullivan's fiancee Yoshita, her experiences with Thai men were more traumatic.
"I was planning to marry my first Thai boyfriend, but he did not show up on our wedding day. He embarrassed me and my family," Yoshita says. "My second boyfriend cheated on me and impregnated another woman."
But Yoshita, who wears a golden heart necklace, says she is looking forward to living in Florida with the man of her dreams -- even if she still refers to him by his last name.
"I believe Mr Sullivan is a gift from God. He is really a good man and respects me. Every day I pray and thank Buddha for giving me Mr Sullivan," she says.
Sullivan nodded and held her hand.
"I have to step outside my own culture to find someone with whom I am compatible. I am not narrow-minded in that regard," he smiles.
Drug use is how men are infected, accding to the most recent studies, but the incidence of infection in women has spiked due to their sexual contact with drug-abusing men--same is true here in the US. There are now more new cases of AIDS in women than in men.
This thread is a great example of the gender war. Unfortunately its all criticism with little constructive solutions. Women in the western world need to ask themselves where they went wrong and try to fix the problems that got them here.
I must tell you though many male ER nurses have mannerisms that leave you guessing, but then again it doesnt take a certain cheery type of disposition to work around that kind of death and pain everyday.
meant it does take a cheery type of personality, geez my typing is horrible.
Well, its not full of idiot expats, I assure you.
Its a 6 ft long bamboo bar, in an edge of a parking lot about a 3 minute walk in on Sukhumvit 11 on the left side. Has about 10 stools and all the beer is in an ice cooler (50 bht each). Its a fun little place to grab a beer, and if you are hungry there are 2 Indian resturants about 15 paces away, and a really crappy english pub about 40 paces away. I always stay in the hostel right there, $17 bucks gets me a private room, king size bed, an ensuite bathroom and free breakfast, plus free internet, tv and a great rooftop garden.
And that Jesus character!
Never working, always hanging out with those nasty fishermen, bringing home tax collectors and Pharisees for ME to cook for while they sit around talking about religion...
BORING!
I need to go to the Mall o' Jerusalem once in a while, ya know!
You've revealed yourself for the low class, brassy mouthed, miserable woman that you are. Congrats!
Funny, because I think you're probably the type of mistake I try to avoid as well. And interesting that I am coarse, but some of the males in this debate who have been my equal or better in "coarseness" do not arouse your ire. You will likely say that it isn't womanly to argue with a man in the way I have, using words that are perhaps past the boundary of good taste. But the alternative, at least in FR, is to allow swaggering posts and general denigration of women, and if my choice is to be coarse and disliked by some of the men on here, or to shut up and sit down like a good little feminine lady, I will choose the former.
I'm not bitter and I'm not angry -- until I see men like some on this thread denigrating American women. And then, yes, I get angry and I give back as good as I get. Please do not worry that I am "repulsing" men; I am well-taken care of in that department and have no concern about my relationships with men. The man I am with actually enjoys intellectual sparring with a woman and is proud of the fact that we are equals.
If you go back to the beginning of this thread, you'll see that this whole thing started because I thought Mr. Sullivan -- and others in the article about searching out Asian brides -- were perhaps less "masculine" than they should be. The last 300 posts have proven nothing to me except that there are many men on this site who aren't interested in women in any way other than a less-than-equal, as a possession.
What is interesting to me, although I am a lifelong conservative, is that whenever I get involved in any of these long arguments on FR, I start to question whether some of the folks on FR really represent the movement and whether I really belong as part of the movement; it seems "reactionary" is not an inappropriate word to describe some of the opinions here.
I don't know, 'tis a puzzlement for me. Thanks for your thoughts.
I don't doubt that, it's just that I honestly wasn't aware of it.
I did ask cammie, though, why a gay man would travel half way round the world to find a WOMAN. She never actually addressed that, but she did insult my reading skills and some other things.
Wimpy little men let it happen.
Of course she is going to spew bile over such a suggestion--so beneath a female attorney....
But, have you actually tried to darn a sock?
It's hard. There's a whole dying technology to it with 'darning eggs' to stretch the sock out; needles and thimbles and technique to getting the patch to hold, but not rub your foot. It takes time. In time value, it is now cheaper to buy a new pair--it's just another bit of household art that is going away.
I saw my Grandmother do it. Really, if you ever find a woman who is able and willing to darn your sock, keep her; she is a rare gem and worth a dozen female attorneys, writers, stockbrokers or professors!
I remember a male ER nurse who had a gun in one boot and a hunting knife in the other. But he'd never, never have an emerald in his ear.
Really I have no idea about AIDS in Thailand. My wife doesn't have it and neither do I so that is really all I need to know. It is not in the news much so I assume it is not a big problem here.
He doesn't know what 'begging the question' means either?
As its Christmas Eve here, Merry Christmas and best wishes to All.
Those can be fun also. :) Let me know next time you are in town and I will see if I can make it.
No. But I can knit, crochet, sew and cook. So I suppose, if a nuclear holocaust occurred, and I absolutely HAD TO mend socks, I could.
That said: don't buy expensive socks. Buy cheap socks, and then all socks with holes in them -- his, hers, whatever -- can get thrown out and replaced. This is what I do with that big salary people have been commenting on.
Because he is looking for one that used to be a man? ROTFLMAO.
Thank you.
You know what I'd like to do with my "female attorney" money? Buy you some damn therapy so you could get to the root of your problems.
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