Posted on 11/10/2006 7:13:49 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
CHICAGO -- Some parents are writing their college-age children's resumes. Others are acting as their children's "representatives," hounding college career counselors, showing up at job fairs and sometimes going as far as calling employers to ask why their son or daughter didn't get a job.
It's the next phase in helicopter parenting, a term coined for those who have hovered over their children's lives from kindergarten to college. Now they are inserting themselves into their children's job searches -- and school officials and employers say it's a problem that may be hampering some young people's careers.
"It has now reached epidemic proportions," says Michael Ellis, director of career and life education at Delaware Valley College, a small private school in Doylestown, Pa.
At the school's annual job fair last year, he says, one father accompanied his daughter, handed out her resume and answered most of the questions the recruiters were asking the young woman. Even more often, Mr. Ellis receives calls from parents, only to find out later that their soon-to-be college grad was sitting next to the parent, quietly listening.
Jobs counselors at universities across the country say such experiences are commonplace.
"My main concern is the obvious need of the students to develop their independence and confidence," says Kate Brooks, director of the Liberal Arts Career Services at the University of Texas. "I think it's great that parents want to share their advice -- and even better that students of this age are willing to listen -- but I think the boundaries get crossed sometimes."
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtontimes.com ...
She wrote my resume, gave me career advice, and sat in on my job interviews but she wouldn't give me a Pepsi ... just one Pepsi ...
Another hellish condition allowed by the invention of the cell phone.
Recently, I have seen this creep in with graduate students I work with, especially the daughters. The ones whose parents get involved don't always have the best reputation as it is. I have wondered out loud what will happen when they get jobs. Now we know...
You can't blame the kids. They've been raised with mum or da making all their decisions supervising every aspect of their lives, they've never had an opportunity to become people. My wife works at a college, she deals with helicopter parents all the time, she looks the kid dead in the eye and includes the kid's name in a question and before the kid can even open their mouth the parent is answering. That's the environment these kids have been in all their lives, they've probably never had a chance to order their own food at a restaraunt, pick their own classes or extracurricular activies in school, decide on their own clothes. Their parents never shut their yaps long enough for the kid to advance past age 6 in maturity.
Cell phones aren't nearly close enough contact for helicopter parent, about the only thing these parents aren't right there in the room for is trips to the bathroom for opposite gendered kids, and that's only because they'd get arrested.
Just remember, all the perfect children of FR are competing against these dolts...means more $$$ and opportunities for them...
I have two sons 18 and 20. They both know I am there as emergency backup, but they are adults. They can ask my advice, and do, occasionally, but they are adults. It's there decision about school, work, where to live, what to wear, when to get their hair cut.
I'm supposed to hover? My youngest wouldn't have let me hover if I had wanted to...
"Hmmm ~ you gotta' understand that when the parents have $100,000 and up invested in the kid's degree, they have a serious interest."
Ya, Mom and Pop are the co-signer's on the loan. In addition they probably took a second morgate on the house to pay for college. They are going to be damn sure Junior gets a job.
Junior does have to stand on his own two feet though.
I'm not blaming the kids. I am saying they are what they are and I would not hire one.
ping
>>That's the environment these kids have been in all their lives, they've probably never had a chance to order their own food at a restaraunt, pick their own classes or extracurricular activies in school, decide on their own clothes. Their parents never shut their yaps long enough for the kid to advance past age 6 in maturity.<<
That's why I would not hire them - at least right out of school. They need their expectations changed with a serious paradigm shift. Once another employer or three has worked that out of them, I may want to look at their accomplishments to determine if they would be a good fit in my company.
OTOH, it is becoming quite common for companies to treat their employees like children.
No parental guidance at all or insanely too much now.
Sigh.
But, I don't think I'd ask them to come to the job interview with me. I think that I'd automatically DQ anyone who brought Mommy to any interview that I've conducted.
It's astonishing that parents place that much value in what undergraduate college their child attends. It doesn't really matter that much - it's amazing that 'adults' don't have a grasp of that.
pathetic adult children ping
We're in agreement regarding cellular telephones providing way too much ease-of-contact. When I was in college, twenty-five of us shared a payphone in the hallway and contact with home typically occurred on a weekly basis. People raced to answer the ringing phone because it was such a rare treat.
I'm an adult and I love and cherish my parents. I would run through fire for them. They were similarly wise enough to stay away from my job interviews!
~ Blue Jays ~
For pity sakes... my daughter is disabled and I don't hover like that! How the heck are these kids ever gonna grow into independent adults?
some of it comes from legacy schools, I went to X you must go to X.
or
from the 1950's mentality that college educations meant something. In this day and age, most college kids have to take remidial classes in their first year!
We have too many schools becasue schools are cheep to build and have the protection of student loans which can never be forgiven. (why do we have so many law schools?)
I agree entirely. Actually, when it comes to legacies, I would strongly discourage my child to go to my college! :-)
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