MODERN MANNERS (Offering a Woman a Seat Is 'Creepy,' According to GQ)

New York Post ^ | August 18, 2006 | Liz Smith

[nickcarraway]

'WOMEN ARE equals now. They can fend for themselves. To offer a perfectly healthy woman a seat simply because she is a woman, however well-intentioned, is creepy. At best, she'll think you're from another country; at worst she'll feel old, or overweight enough to be perceived as pregnant."

And that is a lesson in modern manners, according to the new issue of GQ (with Clive Owen on the cover). Glenn O'Brien and other GQ scribes weigh in on e-mails, cellphones, gym etiquette, dressing for travel, how to handle chatty seatmates, sleeping with your friend's ex, online dating, wedding gifts and how to treat gay people: "Gay people don't want to freshen up the world, they just want to be a part of it." (So don't ask for makeovers and fashion tips.)

Oh, but you certainly should open doors for women: "Why? To be nice, you mannerless ape!"

[BenLurkin]

Only in the increasingly barbaric urban areas would this common courtesy be considered "creepy".

[Peach]

This is absolute BS. All the women I know love it when men act like gentlemen and stand when they enter a room, pull out their chair, open their doors, etc.

I've never known a woman alive who thinks that good maners is creepy.

[JimSEA]

I'm elderly, they'll just think I am senile (likely correctly).

[BenLurkin]

As for holding doors -- I do that for everyone.

[apackof2]

On the other hand.....

[gridlock]

As long as you're not offering her a seat on your lap, I think you're in the clear...

[pbear8]

Not offering a lady a seat is creepy - PBear

[rockabyebaby]

What a crock O'crap!

[AnotherUnixGeek]

All the women I know love it when men act like gentlemen and stand when they enter a room, pull out their chair, open their doors, etc.

The problem, of course, is that you can't tell what the women you don't know think about these things. Until they figure it out and let the rest of the world know, I'll limit my trivial chivalry to holding doors open that I enter first - just as I'd do for any man or child.

[freepertoo]

This woman adores it when a man acts like a gentleman. It's a sign of respect...something in very short supply these days.

Stop the world, I want to get off.

[eyespysomething]

Or, like me, give the gemtleman a nice smile, say Thank You and graciously accept.

[SamAdams76]

I had my wife ask a gay neighbor for his opinion on drapes she was thinking about buying for the dining room and also his opinion on whether her purse went with her dress. Also, when I saw him the other day, I asked him if my T-shirt made me look too fat.

Hope this wasn't considered rude.

[-=SoylentSquirrel=-]

I thought I knew all the rules of common courtesy, but then I moved to Texas and found a concept I'd never been introduced to:

Upon exiting an elevator, allow the woman/women to exit first, no matter what their order of entry was into the elevator. If they are at the back of the elevator, stand to the side. Block the door open with your arm, if necessary.

I like the manners in Texas; it reminds me of California back in the '60s. The 1860s, that is.

[mockingbyrd]

I always thank a man who offers his seat or any other chivalrous act. I thank him for the courtesy offered to me and for his attempts to better society in general.

I was traveling last week with my three year old and one year old, and a gentleman offered to help me with my carry ons (back in the good old days) as we deplaned. I think it takes a lot of courage these days, I have heard women lash out or suggest that the man's motives were less than respectable. Pathetic.

[leda]

just an excuse for poor manners?

[Sam's Army]

"Gay people don't want to freshen up the world, they just want to be a part of it." (So don't ask for makeovers and fashion tips.)"

I can't remember the last time I honestly thought GQ was a "Man's" magazine. Prolly about the last time I watched SNL and thought it was funny.

[brytlea]

'WOMEN ARE equals now. They can fend for themselves. To offer a perfectly healthy woman a seat simply because she is a woman, however well-intentioned, is creepy. At best, she'll think you're from another country; at worst she'll feel old, or overweight enough to be perceived as pregnant."

I would like to see a poll. I doubt this is the case. I'm a prefectly healthy woman (ok, a little overweight and yeah, getting a little old) and I am not offended when a man offers me his seat. What I think is, "Wow, a guy who has good manners, he must have had a great Mom!" And, I will certainly offer my seat to someone if they look for any reason like they could use it better than I. susie

[ElkGroveDan]

To offer a perfectly healthy woman a seat simply because she is a woman, however well-intentioned, is creepy

But a man donning eye makeup and false breasts is trend-setting fashion.

Can we re-wind this world to about 1946 and start again?

[Paperdoll]

Few things glorify me as a woman more than when a man opens a door for me, stands up when I enter the room, or offers me his seat.