Posted on 07/15/2006 4:49:25 PM PDT by Pokey78
NEWLYWEDS in America are “meshing” their names in an attempt to banish the sexism that comes when a woman takes her husband’s surname. Much as the tabloid newspapers have christened film stars Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes “Tomkat”, couples are opting to mix and match elements of their names as a sign of togetherness.
Gary Ruderman, 43, a playwright and architect, got married last year to Jodi Wilgoren, a writer for The New York Times. The couple now go by the name of Rudoren. Ruderman’s wife-to-be first raised the subject, saying that she would love to share his name but on an egalitarian basis.
“I have a lot of respect for Jodi so I considered it,” he said. “Some clients couldn’t wrap their heads around it, but very few people I talked to said, ‘Oh that’s stupid’.”
One friend teased Ruderman that “married life has taken the ‘man’ out of you” but even his parents came around to the idea. “They felt it was a little bit unusual, but I think they were just happy that, at 42, I was getting married,” he said. “My mother has taken to introducing me as her son Gary Rudoren.”
Jodi Rudoren, 35, ruled out hyphenation when her nephew pointed out that “our name wouldn’t fit on the back of a sports shirt”.
One name-meshing pioneer is Antonio Villaraigosa, the mayor of Los Angeles, who combined his name of Villar with his wife’s name of Raigosa in 1988.
“I was planning to take his name,” his wife Corina recalled. “But he said, ‘Really? But Raigosa is your name’.
“He said, ‘I’ve been thinking about it and why don’t we combine our names to make one name? If you are willing to take my name, I should be willing to take yours’.”
Villaraigosa recalled that “guys made fun of me” but the voters of Los Angeles have long since forgotten it.
The feminist custom of retaining one’s maiden name is going out of fashion. According to Claudia Goldin, an economics professor at Harvard University, the number of college-educated women in Massachusetts who kept their original name at marriage dropped from 23% in 1990 to 17% in 2000.
“It’s gone the same way as feminism,” Goldin said. “There has been a shift even among liberals towards more family-oriented values.”
Those who begin by hyphenating their surnames often give up, Goldin added: “They have these long names and then they have problems with the school district or the plumber. It gets too hard.”
An example of the "New Castrotti".
Actually, I just know his name as the one I could never spell in a million years, and now I know why.
If he'd kept his old name, I would have had a fighting chance.
D
It makes as much sense as black people naming their kids names like Shithead (Sha-theed) and Asshole (Ashowlay) or Lemonjello (Lemon-jalow) or Orangejello (Oron-jalow). Believe it. It actually happens.
Not me, it is warning flag that I am dealing with a maroon.
That's no regular ugly fat broad! Why that's Janet Reno!!!
Do you know where that picture was taken, and when? Is there a larger picture in existance? Why? The least male looking character (in the middle) looks very much like an old buddy from high school.
How would any future generations be able to uncover their family trees - this is selfish if you ask me
You`re right...It seems she is at a restuarant to stuff her fat face and he is the waiter taking her order for buckets of lard.
I believe it is the same in the Philippines (due to the Spanish influence.) The wife takes the husband's surname, but their children adopt the mother's maiden name as their middle name.
Actually, in Spanish-speaking countries, the wife keeps her maiden surnames throughout her life.
When a child is born he has a "first surname....primer apellido" (that of his father) and then a "second surname.....segundo apellido" (that of his mother).
In Portugal, the custom is reversed with the father's surname coming last. "John Fitzgerald Kennedy" would be a Potuguese-style name with the mother's surname after the Christian name and the father's surname last.
The problem with the American custom is that the system kills off the maternal family heritage even while the grandparents are still alive. For example: Without Googling, does anybody know the name of the maternal grandfather of the Bush twins?
It's "Welch".
Under the Spanish system, the Bush twins would be known as "Barbara Bush Welch" and "Jenna Bush Welch".
If Jenna marries "John Smith Harrison" and has a son named George, her son would be "George Smith Bush".
The system is fantastic for genealogy as, with every name, you get both the paternal and maternal surname. Instead have having a Mr. and Mrs. John Smith who had a son named John Smith, Jr. who married Mrs. Mary Smith who then had Mr. John Smith III who married Mrs. Joan Smith all of which were related who knows how to various Tom, Dick and Harry Smiths, each Spanish generation has it's unique generational surname combination that tells you which Tom Smith was the brother and which Tom Smith was the uncle and what family each brother married into.
The generation of the children of the first John Smith would be the Smith Harrisons. The generation of the children of John Smith Harrison would be the Smith Wilsons. The generation of the children of John Smith Wilson would be the Smith Browns.
If your genealogy searches discovers discovers a "Tom Smith Harrison" and a "Tom Smith Brown". You know that Tom Smith Harrison was the uncle of Tom Smith Brown and the brother of John Smith Harrison.
With this system, it was possible for me to document maternal lines dating back to before Columbus. Yet, in the American system, we have to use Google to know the family name of the maternal grandfather of Jenna and Barbara Bush.
Given the choice between giving my surname to my wife or giving my surname to my daughter and her children for centuries to come, I would much rather choose the latter.
So if Doty Goodman married Truman Capote
her name would be Doty Capote?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Let me explain - my folks freaked out when I kept my middle name and lost the maiden name. But I didn't want my maiden name - I had 23 years of spelling my last name for everyone. I didn't want another 60 of spelling my middle name.
Um, not to nitpick, but if you're going to complain about lousy public schools and spelling, a point I agree with, you might want to rethink your spelling of "there" in your post. :>
If I got married, I'd be proud to take my husband's name. I don't see it as sexism at all.
First of all...much ado about nothing. I don't believe this is a wide spread thing. I don't understand conservatives sometimes. We go crazy over this? First of all the wacko actors that are doing this are doing it with their FIRST NAMES. I don't hear any with their last name. I bet this has been done with no more than 20 people in America. This is just another bs story to upset Religious conservatives and it looks like it is working. They are laughing at us. I can't stand there thinking, but I hate the media more for doing stories that are so ridiculous and do them like dangling a carrot in front of us!!!! Ugh!!!
Well said, Mrs. Coordinatorstudmuffin ;o)
lol.
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