Posted on 04/01/2006 6:40:33 PM PST by twippo
SELMER, Tenn. - Mary Winkler was the quiet, unassuming wife of a small-town, by-the-Bible preacher, seemingly devoted to church and family. But now her husband, Matthew, is dead and she is charged with shooting him in the back with a shotgun.
Authorities won't discuss a motive, and church members say they didn't see any indication she was unhappy. But experts say preachers' wives often struggle with depression and isolation, expected to be exemplars of Christian virtue while bearing unique pressures on their private and public lives.
Gayle Haggard, author of "A Life Embraced: A Hopeful Guide for the Pastor's Wife," said ministers' wives can feel isolated because of a misconception about leadership, since they and their husbands are leaders of their congregations.
They can feel trapped, she said, by unrealistic expectations "to live a certain way, to dress a certain way, for their children to behave a certain way."
And ministers' wives often find themselves handling more jobs than they expected to take on, said Becky Hunter, current president of the Global Pastors Wives Network.
"You're not really hired, and yet there is some expectation in most church settings that the pastor's wife comes along in a package deal," Hunter said.
Too often, ministers and their wives are reluctant to seek emotional help from members of their congregations because they're looked up to as leaders, said Lois Evans, a former president of the Global Pastors Wives Network. They can become isolated, lonely and depressed.
"This family needed help," said Evans. "It seems like there was no place to turn to and no place to talk and it became an explosive situation."
Matthew Winkler, 31, was found dead in a bedroom at the couple's parsonage Wednesday night in Selmer, a town of 4,400 people about 80 miles east of Memphis. Mary Winkler, 32, and her three young daughters were found Thursday night leaving a restaurant in Orange Beach, Ala., about 340 miles from Selmer. Orange Beach Police Chief Billy Wilkins said she had rented a condo on the beach after the slaying.
She was charged with first-degree murder and ordered held without bail. Tennessee Bureau of Investigation agent John Mehr said authorities know the motive for the killing, but he would not disclose it.
Mary Winkler was working part-time as a substitute teacher and taking college courses to get a teaching certificate as well as raising her three children and serving the congregation as its preacher's wife.
"You know she was weighted down," said Jimmie Smith, a member of Matthew Winkler's Fourth Street Church of Christ congregation and a retired psychiatric nurse.
Defense lawyer Steve Farese refused to talk about the Winklers' private life or if they had personal troubles.
"I can't discuss anything she's told me," Farese said. "But I think you have to look at the entire picture. You can't look at the end of a story and determine what the beginning and middle were."
A wife, or anyone else should not submit if it means committing a sinful action, i.e. Ananais and Sapphira.
And it was God, and Christ, who told the Apostle Paul, and the apostle Peter what to say in the verses I cited above, that you have yet to answer. As Paul said in II Timothy 3:16, all scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.
So you see, it is I who trust Christ. I am adhereing to his word. I don't have to rely on song lyrics, or the words of man. I have come to my conclusion, based on my study of God's word, and not what my "pastor" says.
And in case you wish to argue that all scripture is not from Christ Jesus, Please read John 1: 1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. 4 In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. "The Word" refers to Christ Jesus, my Lord. So you see, it is Christ who I trust. He spoke the words of Romans, and Ephesians, and Colossians, and I Peter. He spoke them through those men, by giving them inspiration. So, I do trust Christ. Do you?
And I'm still waiting for you to tell me what word doesn't belong in I Peter 3.
Again, the thief on the cross died before Christ completed his ministry. Before Christ's sacrifice was complete. The thief died under the Law of Moses with it's mode of salvation. Christ changed that with his death, burial and resurrection.
Mea Culpa. I left my message at the end of the thread, and didn't notice this was addressed some pages earlier.
Well, David Libscomb University is NOT the church of Christ. It is a university. It is not governed by any congregation of the church of Christ. It does not have to answer to any church board or body. No church can tell David Libscomb university what to do or not do, or who to fire or not fire. So please, don't compare the two.
Babies are still innocent. I cannot speak for God but I believe that those who are innocent will have their reward in heaven.
Romans 4:3 For what saith the scripture? Abraham believed God, and it was counted unto him for righteousness.
Galatians 3:6 ¶Even as Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness.
Well, whether or not you were taught it, it is what the RCC believes. And to state what someone believes isn't beating up on anyone.
Man, how did you learn to read? That verse says it's a work of GOD, not of man. Get a grip, will ya?
John 6:29 Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.
Rusty is Church of Christ now. But how do you know what he was raised?
Then you are a liar because you have already stated that you trust your baptism for salvation.
I am adhereing to his word. I don't have to rely on song lyrics, or the words of man.
Who does?
I have come to my conclusion, based on my study of God's word, and not what my "pastor" says.
You would never in a million years be in a cult like church like the CoC if you hadn't of been born in or influenced by one of their pastors.
Only the CoC could drag one away from God's grace and then have the person dragged away brag about it.
Galatians 1:6 ¶I marvel that ye are so soon removed from him that called you into the grace of Christ unto another gospel...
You would never in a million years be in a cult like church like the CoC if you hadn't of been born in or influenced by one of their pastors. Only the CoC could drag one away from God's grace and then have the person dragged away brag about it.
What about the verses that tell us to be baptised? What do we do with those? Ignore them so that you can determine what is needed for salvation?
Why were they put in the Bible?
Why do you not want to be baptised? Are you too pure to need it?
Why was Christ baptised if it is for nothing?
A "Church of Christer" or anyone else for that matter here on Earth cannot tell you if you are going to Heaven or Hell. If you believe the Bible it tells us what to do to be saved. It's up to us to do those things, and God will be the judge of our destination.
Well all, look and see what happens when one cannot defend what they stand for. The have to resort to ad hominem attacks. Pretty sad Full Court.
Actually, I trust the Word of God, and the fact that he himself told me to be baptized. You have yet to show me proof that baptism isn't essential. You have yet to answer my question regarding I Pet 3. No, you have to degrade yourself and call me names. Is that the best you can do? I'm sure you are proud of yourself. I have tried my best to carry on a civil, courteous, loving discussion with you, but yet you continue to call me names and tell me I'm going to hell. Not once have I said I thought you were going to hell.
The church of Christ didn't drag me anywhere. No one influenced me except my Lord and Savior Christ and his Father, my Father, Jehovah God.
I worked out my salvation with fear and trembling after study of God's word. At least I can defend my belief that baptism is essential. I wish I could say the same for you. But all you can do is make ad hominem attacks.
I have read with interest all of your unkind and demeaning rhetoric regarding baptism. You are obviously trained by a "Pastor" to give stock answers to biblical doctrine. I challenge you to give me and the other readers one instance in the new testament which indicates that after the church was established on Pentecost day anyone who was saved without being baptized. You will not be able to give us a single person who ever ate a bite, drank a drop or slept a wink after learning what to do to be saved before being baptized for the remission of their sins.
Please show some humility, (required by our Lord) in your answer, simply give me the scripture and I will be convinced.
Then they all need to shut up and stop proclaiming that they do know you will go to Hell if you are not baptized.
You are quite obviously a liar. Carry on.
"Now if Timotheus come, see that he may be with you without fear: for he worketh the work of the Lord, as I also do." -- I Corinthians 16:10.
Clearly, something being the work of the Lord does not preclude the involvement of human beings in doing that work (in this case, Timotheus and Paul).
She is the one who has committed mortal sins. He may be partly responsible for the terror inflicted on the children (and no doubt a monster in his own right from all indications) but she is the one who dragged those angels into the abyss.
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