Posted on 03/30/2006 12:41:35 PM PST by twippo
Someone needs to sit our people down and have a healthy discussion about the names we as African Americans are giving our children. We are hurting our kids and putting their futures in peril from the moment they are born.
That’s right, I said it. We are KILLING our kids and crippling their futures with the names we give them. Don’t you want your kids to get JOBS someday? Good jobs, and serious careers? With a name like Jaquez Ja’Quan Diante’, you’re dooming your sons to a life of drug dealing on some seedy street corner.
Our Black men face enough challenges. I do not subscribe to the notion that we are giving our children names that “convey pride in their African Heritage”. We’re way off the mark. I’ve got dear friends from all over Africa, and their children have beautiful cultural names like Akos, Ama, and Fia.
Notice how neither of those names had a “quita” in it? Or an “eisha”? Or more than four syllables? That’s because even in the motherland, they don’t give their kids the crazy names that we do in Black America. Many Africans even RESENT the implication that these names stem from their culture. I’ve yet to meet anyone from any African nation named Shaquandiniquah Takei’sha, or any other of the ‘colorful’ monikers we’re pinning on brand new precious lives.
Parents, we are stacking the odds against our children from birth. We’ve been doing it for generations, but we get mighty cross when white and mainstream America laughs and mocks us. With a name like Quieshianiquita (I know, I can’t pronounce it either), you’re dooming your children to employment at no better than a dollar store or the nearest fast-food joint.
You are automatically relegated in the minds of many to second-class citizenry, because when they hear the name, they instantly categorize you as ignorant, ghetto, incompetent, uneducated, and not worthy of much respect or basic human considerations.
We hear so often about African American students who excel in school, etc. and “beat the odds.” Well, guess what? Often times, the “odds they have to beat” is the tough challenge of being taken seriously in America with the atrocious name you gave them...names like Jaqui’sheia Sha’qu’an Tai’isha. If they can get someone to look past the name (and quit laughing), there is remarkable talent there in that person.
Unfortunately though, much of mainstream America isn’t willing to find this out. Come in with the wrong name, and you are nothing more than fodder for stereotypical, distasteful jokes. We as African Americans face enough challenges as it is. Our kids deserve a better start and a way better shot than this.
You’re angry with me? I can live with that. Now answer this: when have you ever seen an IBM Executive or a fancy New York office with a fancy highrise office door nameplate that says “Quandaniquah Roshel-Shaquita, Chief Executive Officer”? When? You don’t, and you never have, because the reality is, corporate America and a huge chuck of mainstream doesn’t have a high regard for those names. Quite frankly, you won’t be taken seriously.
I’ve been behind many a closed door with white corporate America. Oddly enough, many of them still see the Negro in the room as ‘non-existent’ or invisible, so they talked like I wasn’t even in the room. I hear everything they say. When Nakia Shaniquah-Quashiqua fills out an application, they have a field day in the office. Once they get their fill of ghetto and ‘weave’ jokes and ripping you to pieces sight unseen, they usually toss the application, or it gets stuck in the ‘bottom of the pile’. If they do hire you, you’re relegated to some meaningless, inconsequential task behind the scenes so they won’t be embarrased by you.
I’ve learned the harsh truth that right or wrong, no quality mainstream company wants someone named (oh just pick a name) representing them in the forefront. We don’t hear that, though. We just want you to get the name right, and look at you funny if you don’t. I recall a time a young woman got really cross with me because her name was LaShi’quita and I forgot to capitalize the ‘S’ and left the little accent mark off the first ‘i’ - how was I supposed to know? But lawd ha’mercy...what did I do THAT for? She was mad, hostile, and ready to FIGHT! It was a BIG ridiculously overblown embarassing ordeal (for her), and that’s OUR fault, parents.
She wouldn’t have such a huge chip on her shoulder and be so defensive, confrontational and mean if we had just given her a name that the average person can pronounce or spell. No spell check in the world can help, so most of her existence is spent correcting the spelling of her name, and feeling disrespected because people can’t get it right. We set her up for this constant and unnecessary battle.
I do not advocate naming all our children Bobby and Susie. But let’s do our babies a favor and keep the syllables down to a minimum, leave out the suffixes “quita”, “sheika”,“eisha”, “niqua”, “quan”...anysuffix with the letter ‘Q’. I could go on, but you get where I'm headed.And if you want your child to have an authentic African or other ethnic name, do a little research. Don’t just make up a name and expect the world to be able to spell and pronounce it. You're not being original or cute. That child has to LIVE with that horrible name, and that's not funny...or cute.
Amen. Now pass the cornbread.
Kinda like my son's little league team: 3 kids names Logan, 3 named Dillon, 2 named Ryan. A team of 11 kids only has 6 names among them.
. . . I really DON'T want to start a religious war on this thread though . . . other than to say that Bible names are common in my family and we have some doozies - like all the guys named Nimrod . . . I have four cousins named Nimrod. The tradition in the family is to name the first child Nimrod if it's a boy. When we were pregnant for the first time, my husband was pretty adamant that "no son of mine is going to be named Nimrod!" -- fortunately she turned out to be a girl, so she was named after her two grandmothers and that was AOK.
I have also seen some young people change the spelling of their name to differentiate themselves from others with similar names.
These people invariable are insecure or egotistical.
His first name: J That's it, just J
I am Shekwan. ALT: ShaQwan.
Sokay, I, too, used to be less open minded about names until I started doing genealogical research and realised parents today have nothing on the generations before when it comes to odd names. These things go in cycles.
How about Regnad Kcin? A no-prize to the first one who figures it out.
How about Major Major from Catch-22? And if you want some strange names, look at the Senate and the Congress. John Kerry? Oh wait, that's a strange person, not a strange name.
Once on Howard Stern, he said he met a guy named Nosmo King. Said his mother saw it at the hospital. Never really knew if he was joking or not.
That's Nick Danger reading his name on the door of his office in Firesign Theaters "How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When Your Really No Where at All?"
"male patient named Didymus"
What is the sexual meaning in that? I know Didymus was one of the names of the biblical Thomas. There was Didymus the Blind.
www.newadvent.org/cathen/04784a.htm
You have won a no prize!
It is Kaden. Think cadence with a K. Or Dade County with a K. We always called him Kade.
And of course hubby and I have fun with the LAST names of NFL guys, like Thrasher, etc.
At that time, we were big Oakland Raiders fans. I haven't kept up with the NFL since then except to notice that some of the last names are so large that they seem to require a wrap around on their jerseys.
He is a wonderful man. Don't know if we can claim the credit for him. At some point, they grow up and chose their own path.
The daughter of Bill Lear, developer of the Lear Jet, really is named Shanda. She is a lovely lady and a beautiful singer.
This whole thread reminds me of the line in the movie "Coach Carter," when one pregnant high school girl, who was black, is chided by her friend when she ran down some names for her baby (such as Laquisha, etc.). The friend said, "Why don't you just name her Food Stamps?!"
He's an adult now.
I'm not going to post how it's spelled, I might get kicked off for talking dirty!
bump'Quita
Yes, in River Oaks. The home is on River Oaks Blvd. as a matter of fact.
She and my Dad were good friends.
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