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Your post reminds us in a subtle way that in your mind women are lessers and merely fools or victims of the whims of their men. The men are not bovine providing services for free in your mind, the women are.

Not all women, and not all men. I look down on any woman who would submit to a sexual relationship without being married. I look down on any man who would be in a sexual relationship without being married. (I do however recognize common law marriages. If they have a strong and lasting (several years) committment to each other I count them as married)

Knowing what I do of male nature, the men in most of these situations would be using the women. Men want sex and women want security. However, only a cad would take advantage of a woman this way.

There may be a case (or even a few) of women taking advantage of the men for sexual favors but I've never seen one. Women just aren't wired that way.

it's up to the people involved to make the relationship work, or not work

This is true. But those who don't commit foer the long haul start at a great disadvantage

Not all women, and not all men. I look down on any woman who would submit to a sexual relationship without being married. I look down on any man who would be in a sexual relationship without being married.

You're free to 'look down on' anyone you wish. But you still think sex is something men 'do' and women 'submit to'. These are grownups John. Equal citizens. Both making choices and tryin' to live life best they can. And we have relationships entirely of our choosing. And neither one is a victim.

However, only a cad would take advantage of a woman this way.

I doubt there will ever be a shortage of cads.

From my middle class experience, most of the people I know, moved in together with the best of intentions (to eventually wed). Of those who split up after living together (I know several couples who went on and got married and are married to this day), one or the other decided marriage between them wouldn't work out. And indeed, some of them decided marriage wasn't necessary. And yes, I have heard of women who realized later, the man who they moved in with was never interested in marriage, or changed their minds after moving in with them.

Instead of phrasing it in the negative way you did, I would politely suggest to women, believing as you do, that it is unwise for women to move in with men to protect themselves from the type of male you mention.

It is interesting to me, that the men you know who were so wronged by their wives in divorce situations are always total victims in your mind. You never blame them for their choice of women to begin with. But you are quick to blame women first in any situation.

The truth is in divorce situations, the percentage of men and women who are wronged, approaches parity.