A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day....03-1-06....Housecleaning Avoidus

The school of Hard Knocks | March 1, 2006 | Dolly Howard

[DollyCali]

A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day

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~ Billie, Dutchess, DollyCali, Mama_Bear, GodBlessUSA ~

Ah the joys of cleaning a house…Let me count the ways…../sarcasm

To what shall I compare it? A root canal? A major sunburn on your whole body when you fell asleep for two hours in the tanning table w/o timer? A huge zit on your nose for your senior prom? Liver for your birthday dinner? Looking at pictures of x42? Of sKerry? Or Sheenhan?

I recall the white glove inspections when I was in the Navy. Now a yardstick is the guideline. If you don’t understand this, you are to be commended. There is Housework Avoidus… and the chronic condition: Housework Avoiditis. It is really NOT a bad/deadly condition - just a frustrating one.

Now Free Republic has given a new purpose to life & PRIORITIES, hasn’t it? Should we put off friendship & being informed & getting involved for ….for Housework ?

I think not.

Free Republic has given so much perspective to me with my homemaking chores. How many days can you go without doing dishes? Then when dishes are gone, dig out the paper plates… when they are gone having take-out? And then when money for take-out is gone, deciding to fast a day or two?

How many pots & pans can you burn up as you forget about the “whatever” on the stove as you get into one of Howlin’s live threads, the Tony Snow daily thread? The fun troll thread complete with 35,000 keywords awaits along with Monkey Face, Irish_Thatcherite, & darksheare! Or save toons from Pookie18’s daily offerings? At ATRW you get the latest weather & political essay from the Chair & keep up with all the news of your buddies…Of course the Dose must be checked & pictures saved - ohioWfan, Snugs, MJY1288 and others work VERY hard to give us these offerings. HOW INSULTING TO THEM TO PUT vacuuming before them!. At a word of the Day you find the latest poetry from our own Nicknamed Bob.. And of course always a cute kitty pix along the way. PLUS it is educational. Where else will you find a word to use that 95% of the people you know will not know? And of course the one stop place for news is Gucho’s Operation Phantom Fury… ah, I am salivating now thinking of all the fun awaiting. Clean? Ridiculous!




I personally have destroyed beyond use 9 pans in calendar year 2005. And I am talking about Farberware & GOOD pans…not the el cheapos. I kept them in a box in garage to maybe “clean up” - eventually. Feb 3 they all went into the garbage. Most had a layer of carbon so thick I could not chisel it off. Remnants of spaghetti sauce, homemade soup, linguine, sautéed onions …. Just a few of the treasures lost forever in the pans innards. Feb 8 they were replaced by a brand new set of gorgeous ,expensive (for me) pans from Sam’s club. Thus far NON are burned up. Well, that is because thus far NONE have been used.

Even though I have a virus check & many spy ware programs, I am convinced there is some “code” in my computer that will not allow me to leave even when I try. Rather like a magnet that affixes to my blood stream? I am hoping to solve this & perhaps win a Nobel prize.

Ah to be like The Raven, dog, Paul_Denton, pcottraux and many others - too busy with bachelorhood joys…. single life of fun & games of checking out the gals, in addition to looking for a house, burying dead fish, drawing cartoons --- why on earth clean?… At least THEY have a good excuse.

Pets add another dimension to this task called Housework. Taking the dogs out for potty & then major walks surely is more important than a clean house. The litter & potty centers for cats must be attended to.. Or else. What is “or else? “ From experience. The potty location will change from the litter area to your closet, bathtub, bed, sofa, linen closet, shoes left out (do they ever get put away?).
You can have every dish in the house dirty & Mount Laundry(penned from Iowa Granny ) up to the ceiling but heaven help you…CLEAN THE CAT BOX

Some Freepers like Lysie & Hair of the Dog also have horses! My what opportunities they provide (I am guessing) to avoid housework. Need to ride them, groom them, get feed, straw/hay(what do you get) for them. Clean the stalls? Think I would rather do dishes personally.




For those happy home makers & stay at home mom’s how many excuses can you have for not having a meal ready?

Headaches -- For 9 weeks?

Broken stove -- unplug it or throw the circuit breaker

cut hand? -- until someone demands to see what is under the Band-Aid!

Devoted day to prayer & meditation… might work.

How many excuses can you have for no clean underwear & towels for your gang?

Headaches? See above

Broken washer/drier? See above

Allergy to soaps… you can milk this one with practice.

Students like Tuliptree76, ilovew; apackof2; jemian;s terror.. School work MUST come before cleaning forgoodnesssakes.


Vacuuming & dusting are some interesting tasks.. Boring as all get out & disgusting but interesting. How so ? Well, the challenges are mammoth in the DollyCali household. In the garage now are 9 vacuum cleaners all NOT working. ALL FAIRLY NEW.. What is wrong? Who knows.

Stuff that can be fixed - sometimes easily & sometimes not: STUCK items in various portions of the mechanism, broken rubber “thingie”, full bag/container.

Yes. It would be good to take the vacuum back.. BUT you need the receipt. HA! And of course you never sent in the warranty.. THIS ONE FOR SURE WONT BREAK.

A few of the broken sweepers are the result of me taking them apart to fix them. Of course when I put them together they have extra parts. So the sweeper & extra parts go in a box.

With this many sweepers you would NOT believe the accessories collection I have. Have not a clue what goes to what. They are all in one of these mammoth plastic bins. All perspective husbands (called dates) are asked if they can fix a vacuum sweeper. Answers are noted.

Housework interruptus - now this is when you are really into shoveling a path and some doggone thing stops you. Like the sound from your computer when you get a ping or Freepmail. Well, while you are there, you might as well check latest articles, latest posts & email. Well then maybe check into your blog and then back to your favorite daily threads.

Or the phone rings.. Of course you did sign up for the do not call list but you would much rather chat with the nice telemarketer than clean. Oh.. And then there is the going to mail box, for newspaper etc.. on the way you pull a few weeds. Three hours later you are hungry & sore & tired. Hungry.. No dishes, go out to eat.. While out,. find other diversions. There is always tomorrow donchaknow.

Anyone have a “Repair Container“. Now this is the little(or big) box, bin, container that you put things that need a button, hem repair, seam redo.. Etc. You get the idea. Mine is pretty big as I have kept it since I was married in 1968. (and not repaired anything) . Now & then it gets weeded away. ALL the socks & underwear eventually went to the dust bin (you know that one that you use to dust).. My dust rag container however never gets touched. That is what cats are for! Dusting!

January 4 of this year.. I was in a clean up mood. I didn’t clean house but threw away most of the dust rags & the major contents of the repair box. Actually lined boxes in garage for feral cats with them. Used a few weeks & then tossed & replaced with more. Golly, why didn’t I think of this sooner.

Interesting fact is the NEXT day - January 5 - I got my first cold in years (decades) .. The blessed thing lasted 3 weeks! Think I am going to succumb to a clean up mood again? Fergettaboutit.

Housework disappearus - I am still working on this one.. But my best ideas is to move into a perfect home & then live in a hotel. Things that can help with this is to stop cooking, doing laundry, sell the kids, give away the pets & end all hobbies that involve more than reading a book. My favorite show in bygone years was “I Dream of Jeannie”… ah to wiggle my nose & have a clean house (not to mention LOOK like her!) Anyone with ideas along this line are welcome to contribute.

Well, it is now time for bed.. Now where is that bed anyway? Must be in this room somewhere..

12-28-05 ~ Hall of Fame #14	THIS WEEK'S THREADS 02-27-06 Military Monday 02-28-06 Ice Castles	Opinions by our own 'King of Ping' Every Thursday at the Finest The guy's good, folks!

[DollyCali]

wow on menu..

what is Orrechiette ?

My mom wishes you were her cook!

I need to hit the bathtub. I actually did leave all my clothes outdoors.. quite muddy. A hot bath will feel wonderful.. however since I have Josy, there is no longer a solo bath. As soon as I start the water she is in tub. I decided to just let her do it. I wash her down & rinse her & play a bit & then shoo her out so I can redo the tub with fresh, fur-less water & do a peaceful soak in salts, bubbles, oil etc.

[Kate of Spice Island]

I am doing well. The radical changes in temperature here in PHx is affecting me some, but otherwise, decent.

I mentioned to someone the other day that I will be getting married and thought I would share that again...not too sure about a vanity post...but debating...

[DollyCali]

oh crap.. sounds like you are getting one of those colds that have been going around! Take it easy.

[boxerblues]

Are both boys home now?

Both are stateside for now. Oldest is still recruiting for the Army and the youngest called over the weekend he re enlisted for 5 more years and is headed for Alaska in June...well I now know where this years vacation is going to be at

[DollyCali]

your tagline!

care to share? or is it a MYOB thing?

bathtime! will download & post pix later

[DollyCali]

check FReepmail..

and CONGRATULATIONS!

guess that means we wont be seeing you at Singles thread as often!

[Majie Purple]

"Chocolate Fudge Cake"
I thought for sure you'd say red velvet cake.

[Billie]

wow on menu..

what is Orrechiette ?

I have no idea, but it sounds pretty. :)

Am gone now - your thread is cute, Dolly. :)

[LadyX]

All righty, Missy - our resident Cruella DeVille - -

Talkin' 'bout housework,
and even threw in THIS,
to bring back those old nightmares:

"I recall the white glove inspections when I was in the Navy."

It was even wose when I was a Classroom Instructor for women recruits at Parris Island, having to be "Perfect" all the time...and later, finally in base quarters in Alaska and then on Myrtle Beach AFB, always "at the ready" in case something broke down and a repair person had to be summoned...dinna wanna speck of dust to be reported, and tossed out!!

In Alaska, we inherited living room carpeting that had many times been "initiated" by dogs of the previous occupant, classified as a 4 - at 5, it would be replaced, but I couldn't rest even with that fact.

Thus challenged (in true panic mode), I found a new pet stain remover called OUT! , and applied it so vigorously that when I left, they remarked the carpet at a Level 2..:)

Now, the dining room chairs were a beautiful white fabric...just lovely...UNTIL the plague called volcanic ash that prevailed in Fairbanks sifted in around the window frames and made them a nasty, pasty gray...
HA! OUT! again...passed Final Quarters White Glove Inspection with flying colors...

====================================

Fast forward to Myrtle Beach AFB quarters, and my husband a year later sent as AF Special Ops to Southeast Asia (Oct '67-Oct '68). Since Myrtle Beach was a small Tactical Fighter wing and had plenty of housing, my three children and I (and dog) were allowed to remain in it.

That was a true blessing, as I was teaching that year in the Base School 4 blocks away! The boys were in the 7th and 8th grades there, with all male teachers, so *control* was easy..:) Jennifer was in kindergarten, staying mornings with her little best friend and her mother, who fed them lunch and put them on the bus for the Base Kindergarten...she got home at 3:40, which is when I hit the door from work.

All went well until May of 1968...arriving home on 1 May, there was an "Official Letter" waiting for me...the military equivalent of a Dear John Letter..:(

I found it last week looking for something else, and quote from it the following, prompted by a response to the Pueblo Crisis in the Pacific:

"1. You have apparently been exposed to many rumors concerning the assisgnment of a reserve unit to this base. I have the unpleasant task of confirming this news to you and at the same time to advise that your present quarters will be required for an assigned member of the new unit.

2. When your husband was permitted to retain these quarters, it was with full understanding that should they would be required for an assigned member, a 30 day notice would be provided for you to vacate your government quarters. Unfortunately, I must require you to vacate and termnate yourquarters not later than 31 May 1968."

[snip] [Specific handling details of the extensive paperwork/etc. followed)

Mind you, I was just one of 300 such wives with husbands deployed to Southeast Asia dumped off base, and this was MYRTLE BEACH, SC - a popular RESORT AREA, where all available abodes/chicken coops/tents/etc. are nailed down a year or more in advance for The Summer Season;and at Preium Proces!!
Some lucky wives were able to "go home," but I had no such destination, my mother already deceased and Daddy in a two room apartment in Orlando.
Can you imagine how we scrambled to nail down "anything?!" The terrible handicap of the landlord knowing I would be leaving "it" in just 5 months when my husband would return and be reassigned elsewhere?

Furthermore, I was working full time, unlike some of the wives, and my forays were to some pretty - no, fully - rotten "affordable possibilities." Since a Marine does not get discouraged and tries until they drop dead, I finally went to the office of a trailer park immediately adjoining the base. (The owners owned and operated a HUGE nice Campground south of town on the ocean.)
God accompanied me there to apply for "anything," and it so happened she had *one* rental left...the trailer park was built around some old 30's duplex barebones units, and one was vacant - living/dining/kitchen area - 2 bedrooms & miniscule bath w/ shower only - no a/c, of course.

It turned out she and her husband were staunch Christians, she even conducting Sunday School for park children in her house there! She without hesitation showed it to and offered it to me.
The location was asolutely perfect, literally right outside the South Gate to the base, so no travel cost to the Commissary, base swimming pool, etc.!
The boys could go on their bicycles for simple errands for me.

Then was Crunch Time, working, arranging for a Moving Day (the base did the packing and delivery) - and preparing all by myself for the Dreaded White Glove Inspection - and it *IS* precisely that, two men with clipboards going over everything; even blinds slats, and nooks and crannies for any *sins*...!!

At the same time, I was futilely stirring Ancient Filth in the new place...hanging draperies and pictures on the walls..shifting linens, etc., carload by carload.

Yep - passed with flying colors the Inspection.
[Oh, yes - every night, still managed to type 14-20 page letters to send my husband in Southeast Asia...]

Bad Dolly, for dredging up The Dreaded....

[Kate of Spice Island]

My tagline is just keeping score. It is that old saying...suppose they gave a war and nobody showed up...

[DollyCali]

whoa,,,Alaska. John just returned a few months ago from duty three.. and Til was raised there.

Will you get to visit?

We need to plan NOW for the spring fling at your place for the Heritage group ... BJ needs time to schedule

Bath for sure...N-O-W

[Majie Purple]

Cool...You're getting married! Congrats...& sure post it! Especially if you know lots of folks here...Doesn't have to be too specific...Just a marriage announcement...I'd be happy for ya and want to know if you hadn't have already told me/us here!

[Majie Purple]

Feel better soon Billie!

[boxerblues]

Go enjoy your bath...got me thinking I sure could use a hot steamy tub full of bubbles when I get home from work.

#2 son wants me to go with him when he reports so I am checking into flights now...the prices on them dont look so good though, but Im going one way or another.

We may have to rethink a meeting at my house, hopefully I will make the next Heritage meeting and we can talk then

[LadyX]

Oh, no- "Preium Proces??!!"

Multitasking, trying to edit and cook beef stroganoff..:(

[boxerblues]

guess that means we wont be seeing you at Singles thread as often!

We have a Singles thread and nobody pinged me.....Im hurt lol

[Kate of Spice Island]

Hey, Dolly offered to help me with a vanity post, so I guess maybe later this week we can probably announce it.

I can do some html, but have been under the weather for a few days with this changing weather here in Phx, so I am not sure I have the patience to do it on my own right now. I can alwyas add wedding photos later...

Thanks,

Katie

[Darksheare]

EEEP!

[MEG33]

Johnny Jump Ups ;) I need to clean my mouse..BBL

[Majie Purple]

I went searching for house cleaning gifs and saw this one first and thought of you!