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Michael Moore Statement on Canadian Election
Michael Moore ^ | January 20, 2006 | Michael Moore

Posted on 01/20/2006 5:33:30 PM PST by johnmecainrino

Michael Moore Statement on Canadian Election

Michael Moore is currently in production on his next movie. As an avid lover of all things Canadian, he has issued the following statement regarding Canada's upcoming election on Monday:

Oh, Canada -- you're not really going to elect a Conservative majority on Monday, are you? That's a joke, right? I know you have a great sense of humor, and certainly a well-developed sense of irony, but this is no longer funny. Maybe it's a new form of Canadian irony -- reverse irony! OK, now I get it. First, you have the courage to stand against the war in Iraq -- and then you elect a prime minister who's for it. You declare gay people have equal rights -- and then you elect a man who says they don't. You give your native peoples their own autonomy and their own territory -- and then you vote for a man who wants to cut aid to these poorest of your citizens. Wow, that is intense! Only Canadians could pull off a hat trick of humor like that. My hat's off to you.

Far be it from me, as an American, to suggest what you should do. You already have too many Americans telling you what to do. Well, actually, you've got just one American who keeps telling you to roll over and fetch and sit. I hope you don't feel this appeal of mine is too intrusive but I just couldn't sit by, as your friend, and say nothing. Yes, I agree, the Liberals have some 'splainin' to do. And yes, one party in power for more than a decade gets a little... long. But you have a parliamentary system (I'll bet you didn't know that -- see, that's why you need Americans telling you things!). There are ways at the polls to have your voices heard other than throwing the baby out with the bath water.

These are no ordinary times, and as you go to the polls on Monday, you do so while a man running the nation to the south of you is hoping you can lend him a hand by picking Stephen Harper because he's a man who shares his world view. Do you want to help George Bush by turning Canada into his latest conquest? Is that how you want millions of us down here to see you from now on? The next notch in the cowboy belt? C'mon, where's your Canadian pride? I mean, if you're going to reduce Canada to a cheap download of Bush & Co., then at least don't surrender so easily. Can't you wait until he threatens to bomb Regina? Make him work for it, for Pete's sake.

But seriously, I know you're not going to elect a guy who should really be running for governor of Utah. Whew! I knew it! You almost had me there. Very funny. Don't do that again. God, I love you, you crazy cold wonderful neighbors to my north. Don't ever change.

Michael Moore

(Mr. Moore is not available for interviews because he now needs to address the situation in Azerbaijan. But he could be talked into it for a couple of tickets to a Leaf's game.)


TOPICS: Canada; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: atkins; bluecorvette; butterplease; canadianelection; carbsuberalles; cheesecakebutt; cholesterolismybuddy; cookiedoughicecream; coolwhip; diet; dims; fat; flubber; fluffernutter; food; greenparty; herepiggypiggy; lard; looneyleft; looneylib; michaelmoore; onanysundae; poundsoff; rat; richardsimmons; sayvelveeta; socialist; southbeachdiet; statement; terrorsupporters; trimspafatso; ultraslimfast; weightwatchers; wideload
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To: Brilliant

lower slobbovia


21 posted on 01/20/2006 6:26:49 PM PST by mathurine (ua)
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To: johnmecainrino

Celsius 7/11

22 posted on 01/20/2006 6:30:57 PM PST by maikeru (40000 draft dodgers and 1 province have made this country what it is today...)
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To: SquirrelKing
Michael can't lose weight until he stops ingesting so much protein from his sexual addiction to gay men.He keeps a stable full of fifty gay guys at his home and he runs it like a dairy farm.
23 posted on 01/20/2006 6:34:25 PM PST by rdcorso (There Is No Such Thing As A Neutral Person During A War With Radical Islam.)
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To: rdcorso

Isn't more married or is it a Star Jones deal? You know, a beard.


24 posted on 01/20/2006 6:45:52 PM PST by outofhere2
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To: johnmecainrino
I just couldn't sit by, as your friend, and say nothing.

Granted it is difficult when shoveling half a raw steer down one's gullet.
25 posted on 01/20/2006 6:47:32 PM PST by Bars4Bill
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To: johnmecainrino

hmpff...HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAH , oh man, HHAHAHHAHHAHAHAAAAA * wipes snot from nose* ...

Like we give a phlying phoque what he thinks...LMAO


too funny


26 posted on 01/20/2006 6:50:50 PM PST by kajingawd (" happy with stone underhead, let Heaven and Earth go about their changes")
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To: johnmecainrino

The guy is a communist snake oil salesman. He's learned their is a group of moronic people that will pay money to listen to his lies and believe them all. He's comfort food for liberals. A fool and his money is soon parted.


The only thing I wish for Mike is to have a massive heart attack as soon as possible and do the world a favor.


27 posted on 01/20/2006 6:52:36 PM PST by Proud_USA_Republican (We're going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good. - Hillary Clinton)
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To: Celtjew Libertarian

I'm thinking he'd be a little too big for France.


28 posted on 01/20/2006 6:58:44 PM PST by Brilliant
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To: johnmecainrino

"Help" for the Grits and Paul Martin. As if they don't have enough problems!


29 posted on 01/20/2006 7:00:21 PM PST by You Dirty Rats (I Love Free Republic!)
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To: johnmecainrino
There's a reason it's called morbid obesity, but I'd like to see Moore prove it.
30 posted on 01/20/2006 7:20:18 PM PST by Wally_Kalbacken
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To: johnmecainrino

It aint over till the fat boy sings and he is squealing a high C


31 posted on 01/20/2006 7:21:09 PM PST by spanalot
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To: johnmecainrino

It aint over till the fat boy sings and he is squealing a high C


32 posted on 01/20/2006 7:21:11 PM PST by spanalot
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To: johnmecainrino

The only redeeming value of MM is that he is biodegradable.


33 posted on 01/20/2006 7:31:59 PM PST by allen08gop ("Woman is the most powerful magnet in the universe... and all men are cheap metal!")
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To: johnmecainrino
I wonder if he's going to write and produce another Brokeback Mountain, "The Royal Canadian Mounties".

Leni

34 posted on 01/20/2006 7:35:33 PM PST by MinuteGal (Ahoy there! - "FReeps Ahoy 4" will embark for the Caribbean. The cruise thread is up and running!)
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To: allen08gop

You guys haven't figured it out yet?

Have you ever seen Rove and Moore in the same room together??

Moore is Rove in a fat suit!!!!!!!!!

Who else could do so much damage to the liberals.


35 posted on 01/20/2006 7:36:47 PM PST by bannedfromdu
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